Even With All My Faults
by JadeynKate
Summary: Eleanor has run into Narnia, literally, and she isn't sure what to do with herself. Making sense of the new life she has been thrown into is harder than she thought, especially with family left behind in her past and a young, dark-haired king who is just trying to give her some perspective. Set after Prince Caspian. Edmund/OC
1. An Introduction to the Miracle

Part 1

_And I hope you can see, I'm more than this, this heap at your feet. _

Richard Walters: Elephant in the Room

Eleanor

When I was very young, my mother told me the greatest ambition she had in her life was to witness a miracle. Because her work ethics influenced me more than a bunch, that became my greatest ambition as well. I didn't even know what it meant, witnessing a miracle, and when I asked her one day she explained witnessing a miracle is like witnessing a life become new again. Though this thought was confusing, I still prayed every night to whoever would listen. If my mother wanted to do it, so did I.

It became hard to believe in vain fantasies such as these after my parents and older brother, James, vanished in a fire that managed to destroy almost everything we had. Sophia, my younger sister, and I were sent away from our home on the coast to a redoubtable orphanage in northern London. The younger I was, the easier it was to pray to the stars and still wish this miracle would occur, and I would be there to witness it. But as I grew older, not only did that seem too far-fetched, but also remembering the life I had before me.

With the event of my sister being taken away to live with new family, far away from London, I forgot miracles. As far as I was concerned, they were nonexistent. Now sixteen, Sophia four years younger, my case has not changed.

"_Ma?" my nine year old self called to the kitchen._

_My mother appeared in the doorway, checking to make sure I was okay before answering me._

"_Yes, dear?"_

"_When do you know a miracle is coming?"_

_My mother smiled widely, and then took a seat next to me on the couch._

"_The problems with miracles," she began, taking a piece of my hair and sticking in behind my ear in its place, "is that they are unpredictable. That being said, trying to find a miracle is very frustrating. You can't really go looking for them. They come to you."_

_I scrunched my nose in confusion. "But if they're so miraculous, wouldn't you feel it coming?"_

"_I'm sure you would."_

"_So when is it going to come?" I asked curiously._

_My mother sighed and turned to me. There was something in her eyes that I could see made her sad, yet, her mouth smiled._

"_Probably when you least expect it."_

It's when things didn't go to plan that the first miracle began to unwind in front of me.

* * *

A lump was beginning to form in my throat, sweet like honey but sour like a lemon. Trying to down it, the combination of the two held the dominant taste, sour, which created its own. Something bittersweet. Maybe a better label would fit, but for right now 'bittersweet' seemed as accurate I would get. It's the same feeling I got before crying, or being unsure whether or not something bad would happen.

The lump grew larger and larger. At least, it felt that way. Maybe I was just imagining.

One thing, however, that was absolutely positively _real _is that I wasn't in London anymore, and perhaps I was going crazy.

The first indicator of my insanity was that I went from air-polluted, dark, London streets to a freshly-scented, light, forest in seconds. Unless there was a city forest, and I just hadn't come out on the other side yet, I didn't seem to be carrying the greatest amount of saneness. I wasn't completely entitled to try to believe the only exception, either.

The second indicator was, as I was running, I began to notice some trees moving. Why this even began to cross my vision as I ran rapidly through a forest, I wasn't sure of that either, and then there were whispers too. I couldn't tell if they had just appeared on their own, but after a while I began to hear them like I could heard the wind. They were subtle and quiet, but still very much alive.

The third indicator, probably the strongest, was as I was running, regarding the trees and wondering what had become of the world, I had met up with a pack of wolves. As a looked past the trees on my left side, I could see them through the low umbrage. And then one yelled,

"What do you think _you're_ doing here?"

I didn't have the time during that moment to try to process what I had just heard, so I did what I would have done if any large pack of wolves was in my radar.

Looking down now from the top branches of the tree I held onto for my life, the lump was still present in my throat. The wolves were at the bottom of the tree, circling.

Either I had gone mad, or the rest of the world had.

* * *

**Author's Note: I can't tell you how many times I have tried to write this story. Please review if you wished I would continue and tell me what you think!**


	2. The Vanishing Crown Conspiracy

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed my last chapter. I love you all. Now that school's over, expect around two-three updates each week. Enjoy!**

* * *

Edmund

"Edmund, have you seen my crown?"

Lucy's voice echoed through our sleeping quarters, and I hopped up from my chair without replying to go see if I could help.

"How do you misplace a crown, Lu?" I asked, peering into her clearly discombobulated bed chamber. As I stepped inside, I avoided tripping on the clothes that were strewn all over her floor.

Lucy's hair, which was in such disarray from her vigorous search, whirled through the air as she turned to me. "I don't even know! One moment, it's on top of my head, the next moment, it's gone!"

The search was continued, barely wasting any time as she did to talk to me. After a minute of observing her in her frantic state, I tried to help her think of places the crown could have been left.

"Did you leave it in the dining hall?" I started.

"Nope," she drawled, throwing her sheets down to the bottom of the bed.

"Susan's room?"

"Nope," she said again, but softer than before. I leaned up against the bed post and said light-heartily, "How about Lord Klarke's room from last night?"

She looked up with a very sullen gaze and frowned at me. "Ed. Don't even joke about that."

A smile tugged at my lips, but I held it in knowing it would only make her more agitated. "I'm assuming the waterworks won't be coming from you when he leaves, correct?"

"No way, he's awful," she said, picking up some loose clothes from a cushioned chair and inspecting the spot. "I've never met someone so incredibly flirtatious and barbaric all at once in my whole life."

"Say it any louder and maybe he'll hear you."

"Oh, what do I care?" she said exasperatedly, throwing her hands up. "There's no queen without her crown."

Her dramatization made me chuckle lightly. "You're being ridiculous, Lucy. Worse comes to worse, we'll just have to get a new one."

She glared at me as if my suggestion was the last thing she wanted to think about. "But I don't _want_ to get a new one, Edmund! Aslan gave me that crown at our coronation, and we haven't seen him since we chose to stay with Caspian. It's been five years!"

Beyond frustrated, she stepped outside and sat down on a chair that looked out to the ocean. I tried my best to comfort her as I followed her on the balcony, but all I managed to say was, "I'm sure we'll find it, Lu. It's been less than a day. I'll notify the staff and let know to keep their eyes out if you want."

She instantly stood up and sighed. With an anxious mood came not being able to stay still, I suppose. "I'm sure if my head was screwed wasn't screwed on I would leave that around carelessly, too," she noted dryly.

I couldn't help but release a small laugh as I saw her heading for the door. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Searching for my head, care to join me?"

* * *

Awhile later, I abandoned the search for the missing crown and went to find Peter. When I entered his study, I was met with the booming noises of him and Caspian yelling at each other. They both held their stances of his desk, in each other's faces, not even caring to regard me. Susan sat in a chair nearby, completely unmoved.

I sat down in a chair next to hers. "How long have they been like this?"

"Almost all day," she sighed, not looking up. "Both of them are too big-headed for their own good."

I watched as she spoke, my brother and a dear friend of ours, debating like old men in politics. I suppose that's just what they were. Susan looked out the window, appearing not interested in their banter anymore.

"That doesn't prove she's any less capable of being an assassin," I heard Caspian remark. Peter gave him the death glare as he answered.

"What exactly are they talking about?" I asked her as she turned back to me, blocking out the yells.

"One of the wolf packs picked up a girl they found in the woods a few days ago," she explained. "They have her down in the dungeons now."

"You think she's a spy?"

"That's what some people believe."

"Why haven't I heard about it?" I questioned, a bit angry I had been left out of the news. Susan just rolled her eyes at me. "Calm down, I don't need you to be angry as well as everyone else. It's been a rough few days; lot of controversy."

"Controversy on what?"

"What we should do with her," she told me. "She's human, but that's all I know."

"Why is it stirring up such a fight then? Surely one girl can't do much harm, that's saying if she is dangerous," I said.

Susan smirked. "Of course you think that. Ed, remember you're only seventeen."

I didn't really understand what she meant, but I didn't say anything because the yelling got louder. I was known as the voice of reason in the monarchy, especially to Peter. When he and Caspian got into a fight, there was no way to tell what would happen. Some days they would make up and then never speak about it again. Sometimes they would hold a grudge against each other for weeks. I was the only person Peter took serious enough to listen to while he was too riled up to think straight. As their voices got quieter, Peter slammed his hand down on his desk. "You know the fights are only becoming more and more frequent," I said.

She looked to me and said with a great deal of sadness in her tone, "Don't become serious like the rest of them, Ed. You and Lucy are the only ones left. I can't afford for that to happen," my sister turned to Peter and Caspian, their bickering now white noise in our conversation. "I don't know what's happened, but something has snapped. In both of them. They've never been this cross before."

"I would think you could prevent that just because Caspian still seems charmed by you."

"I tried," she said while laughing half-heartily, but I could tell how upset she was. After we decided to stay with Caspian, things never really hit it off between them. They seemed to be waiting for something to happen, but I grew less and less interested in whatever was going on between them over the years. "Believe me. But like I said, they're both big-headed and proud and overconfident."

"I know that."

She opened her mouth as if to say something, but then noticed the yelling had stopped. I turned my head and saw Peter and Caspian were sitting, scribbling furiously on their separate papers, absolutely silent.

"Have you compromised?" Susan asked calmly. The older kings heads popped up to meet her glare.

"Yes, we've agreed to question her," Peter looked at Caspian with a taunting look in his eyes before saying, "Caspian's decided that he isn't scared of one girl-"

"We agreed, didn't we?" Caspian seethed.

"OH, SHUT IT!"

Fury was laced in Susan's voice, and was present in her expression, now standing and gripping the sides of the chair with clenched fists. Steam was rolling of her sides, like all her anger had just exploded all over the both of them.

She stepped towards the desk. "Let's not forget that you two bigmouths aren't the only people who rule this country, okay?"

After she made her statement, she left the room, slamming the doors behind her. Peter and Caspian both looked dumbfounded, but I wasn't in the mood to talk to either one of them so I left as well.

Entering the hallway, the silhouette of Lucy with a crown atop her head came into my vision. As I got closer I remarked with a smile, "Found the vanishing crown, I see?"

"Turns out it was in Susan's room," she said sheepishly. "I guess I just have to get better at 'looking'."

I rolled my eyes and we continued walking together in no direction in particular. I debated whether or not I should tell her about the fight between Peter and Caspian, but I doubt she wanted to hear it so I decided to keep quiet.

"What's got Susan all riled up, by the way?" she asked suddenly. "I just saw her and she had an awfully angry look on her face. I tried to ask her what was wrong but she just ignored me."

Never mind, then. "Just Pete and Cas fighting again, nothing out of the ordinary."

"About what?"

I paused before saying, "Apparently some girl has been found and brought back to Cair Paravel and they couldn't decide-"

"With brown hair?"

Stopping, I noticed a particularly pleased look on my sister's face and furrowed my brows in confusion. "What?"

"With brown hair, and light brown-green…" she drifted off. "Was it brown? Yes. Big brown eyes. She had a bag with her too…"

"Wait-what? You knew about her?" I interjected. Lucy gave me a knowing smile.

"It was blatantly obvious Peter and Caspian would argue on the matter. They fight about what they want for breakfast for Aslan's sake! When Trumpkin told me what was going on a couple hours ago, I decided to take matters into my own hands."

Her mouth was now in a straight line and her demeanor completely firm as I stood dumbfounded. "So-so you talked to her?"

With an exasperated expression she said, "Yes. I talked to her. She explained her situation and I introduced her to Evangeline. Now she is upstairs, getting cleaned up. The poor girl was lovely but she smelled like bark and old shoes."

"What are you going to tell Peter and Caspian?" I said worriedly, wondering how they would handle the fact that their compromise was now completely extraneous.

"I'll let them find out on their own, stir things up a bit," she said daringly, and I couldn't help but smile as she stood there in all her glory, winning the battle between the two other kings without even being in it.

Suddenly a thought entered my mind, so I asked curiously, "So what did the girl say that made you let her go?"

Lucy released a quick chuckle. "I'm sure you'll find out eventually. Her name is Eleanor. She is from London, and she had no idea what a dryad was when I carefully introduced her to Evangeline and explained Narnia."

"From London? You think Aslan sent her?"

"Of course, but the real question is _Why_, I believe," she said surely as we turned a corner. We now stood in the entry hall of the castle, which was bustling with activity. Through all the creatures working, on the opposite end, I spotted Peter with a sour look on his face as he walked towards us. I suppose when he found out what had happened he went looking.

"But I don't think that's our biggest worry, right now, anyway," Lucy added softly to me, approaching her oldest brother. A sweet smile presented itself on her face as he made eye contact with her, and I knew Peter had lost the battle and it hadn't even started yet.

* * *

**Author's Note: I hope everybody will like this style. I have decided to write this story in multiple narratives to make in more interesting for both myself and the reader. I also changed the plot a bit. The Pevensie's stay with Caspian after PC, and I hope nobody gets especially mad about that. If anyone gets really upset, feel free to suggest ideas. I do have a back-up plan if this doesn't work out. Regardless, please tell me what you think of me changing it, good and bad. I take all opinions. Review if you'd like! Next update will be a lot quicker, I promise!**


	3. Telescopes and Tour Guides

Eleanor

I expected something like concrete, or grass, or even just plain dirt underneath me when I woke, but what I found was something completely different entirely.

Noting how the satin sheets slipped against the satin pillow covers as I lay on top of them was a complaint definitely relevant to the situation I currently found myself in, but I didn't have the mindset to even think about it due to the fact that earlier this morning I woke up in a cold, stoned floored cell that seemed to be in the darkest cavern of this magnificent castle.

I tried to remember relevance and importance were not synonyms, but it seemed I didn't have anything else to complain about. As I got up from bed after my brief nap, I recalled what had happened only in the past couple hours just to make sure it hadn't been a dream.

Somehow, the wolves had gotten me. This I don't know how, but whatever the way, it happened.

I woke up the next morning in a cell to be greeted quite pleasantly by a young queen who told me I was in Narnia. Narnia had talking animals and magical creatures that roamed around the castle, a part of _Cair Paravel._ I repeated this part to myself, though I don't think the idea would ever be understood entirely in my head.

_Talking animals and magical creatures._

_Talking animals and magical creatures._

_Talking animals and magical creatures._

A knock from the door on the wall adjacent to the bed bumped me out of my thoughts. As I opened it, I was met by the dryad, Evangeline, who had previously helped me get ready and find proper Narnian clothing to wear. For me, it was a dark green dress with a square neckline that came all the way past my ankles.

"Evangeline," I said with a small smile. "What brings you back?"

"The monarchs request your presence in High King Peter's study," she said quickly, making sure I was following her as she shut the door. "We don't want to be late."

As we headed down a long hallway with stone pillars on one side, I asked, "What are their names again? I know Queen Lucy mentioned it but I-"

"High King Peter the Magnificent, Queen Susan the Gentle, King Edmund the Just, Queen Lucy the Valiant," she said instantaneously. "They rule along with King Caspian X."

I repeated these names again in my head, because after seeing Evangeline's clear distress on being late, talking probably would not help. I had a million questions that ran through my mind, but I didn't want to cause her any more anxiety. Doing exactly this proved to be easier than I expected, because the beauty of the castle took my breath away along our short walk. Every single hallway was full of bravura decorations and doors running along the walls. As we veered a corner, I could see a giant chandelier in sight with little crystals hanging like raindrops from the ceiling. Another hallway had one side open to the outside world through large pillars that lined the wall. The ocean looked beautiful and made me feel so happy to be in a place as wonderful as this.

We came to a set of tall double doors at the end of a hallway. I stood behind Evangeline as she knocked lightly, and then slowly opened the doors. We entered a large room with bookshelves that lined all the walls, except for one which held a large window with long, red curtains hanging from it. There were a few stairs opposite the double doors, which Evangeline had shut, that lead up to another door which was closed as well. I could hear voices coming from the other room but Evangeline told me to sit so I watched as she knocked on the other door lightly.

She said something very softly against the door. After a few moments, there was an inaudible mutter that came from the room.

She turned to me. "Stay here until one of the monarchs comes to get you."

I nodded and then she left the room, shutting the double doors lightly.

It was a long time before anybody came out of that door, so I stood up and walked around the oval-shaped room, viewing the different items that were present on the shelves, some used as book ends and others used to hold things down. I spotted a telescope at the end of one of the shelves and picked it up gingerly, the lacquered wood appearing to shine as the light hit it. Stepping over to the large window, I opened it carefully and looked through it. There was Narnia, just as beautiful as I had seen it before.

A wave of sadness I had been expecting eventually rushed over me as I looked out of the telescope and then delicately put it back to where it belonged. _Sophia_. I hadn't seen her in years, but I still felt like if I had tried I could have found her. That's what I was trying to do before I came to Narnia.

I had jumped from the window on the second floor of the orphanage without breaking any bones, amazingly, and just ran for it. Some people mentioned Sophia had been taken someplace a few miles south of London, so that's where I planned to go. I at least wanted to get closer to wherever she was. Looking back on it, my plan had many faults, but I knew I had to leave before I was taken away too.

I instinctively put my hand to my neck where the key on the string chain hung loosely, one of the few things that had survived the fire. It had opened a box I had a long time ago that held a small amount of pictures and letters, maybe even sheet music, but none we in my possession anymore. It's the only thing I had now of my life before me.

I sat down, completely overwhelmed by everything that had happened today, and rested my eyes for a few moments before I heard the door up the stairs open.

A man with blond hair walked from the doorway down to me and I instantly stood up. He had a very kingly air to him as he walked, so it was easy to guess who he was. The crown on top of his head was also a clear giveaway.

"Eleanor, correct?" he said, before putting out his hand which I shook carefully and nodded. "I'm High King Peter, and I'm terribly sorry all the trouble you've been through since coming to Narnia. I hope you're comfortable with how things have been going since getting out of the dungeons."

He said his last statement with a small smile, so I tried to return it as I said, "Yes, everything's been wonderful. Thank you for letting me stay here."

"It's not a problem, there's more than enough room in this castle!" he smiled, and then motioned for me to follow him up the steps and through the door to the other room.

Once inside, the same type of decoration was present except in a smaller space, including a large desk at the opposite end. Four other people were in the room, one of whom sat in a chair in front of his desk I recognized to be Queen Lucy.

She gave me a smile, and it appeared she was going to say something but King Peter interjected, "This is Eleanor," he motioned to me and then added, "The Calormene spy everyone's been so worried about."

Another person in the room, I assumed King Edmund, stood by the desk and chuckled lightly before saying, "Caspian, no offense, but when Peter said you had it all wrong, you _really _had it all wrong."

"I'm-I'm sorry?" I said, giving him a confused look and then looking between him and King Peter.

"Caspian thought you could be a Calormene spy," King Peter explained as he sat down in his seat at the desk. "That is why you were sent down to the dungeons in the first place."

"I am very sorry," another king with an accent, and a much darker complexion, said to me. He turned to King Peter, "But after everything that's happened to Narnia, especially with invasions, a little caution couldn't hurt."

"I understand, and I forgive you," King Peter said with satisfaction in his tone.

"I wasn't asking for your forgiveness, Peter, I was asking for hers," King Caspian said eloquently, and it took me a moment for me to realize he wanted me to say something.

"It's fine, really," I said honestly. "I'm just a little confused."

"I'm sure it's something we could help with," Queen Susan, a very beautiful woman, said to me from her spot in the chair.

"_Obviously_," Queen Lucy drawled, and I had to hold back a smile as she asked, "What's confusing you?"

I wanted to say, _What isn't confusing me?_ Narnia is a whole other world, and everything is so different, but I wasn't that bold so I decided to start with, "What's a Calormene?"

King Peter chuckled before answering, "People from another country, Calormen, who we haven't always been on the best terms with."

I nodded, and after a moment of silence he asked, "Is that all, Eleanor?"

"Queen Lucy explained to me as much as I should know, I believe," I said simply, looking at her.

"What was that exactly?" King Edmund questioned, and Queen Lucy answered for me. "Just that Narnia is separate from our world, and we came from London as well, a long time ago. And it's full of magical creatures and talking animals that aren't on Earth. That seemed to be all she needed to know for the time."

King Edmund nodded, and as if dismissing this little meeting King Peter said hastily, "Alright well, if that's all, then I suppose we can all return to our normal duties."

He looked at me, as if wondering if I had anything else to ask, but I shook my head. All at once the other rulers left the study. On the way out, Queen Lucy grabbed my hands and said as if reading my mind, "I know it was probably intimidating to be in there, believe me, I feel the same way sometimes. Take a walk with me and I'll try to explain as much as I can."

I gave her an earnest smile as we walked down the hallway with the open view to the ocean on one side. "Queen Lucy, I do love this place, but I mean-" I trailed off for a bit, trying to find the right words. "I have a sister, when can I go back home?"

Her face dropped into a frown, as did my stomach. "I'm afraid I can't tell you that. Aslan, the lion who is the real ruler of Narnia, sends humans here from our world for reasons we can't be sure of."

I was silent for a while in disbelief. "Will I ever go back?"

All I got was a sympathetic smile. "I'm afraid we cannot know, but Aslan is great, and has His motives for doing these things."

Listening to her words, that lump that tasted bittersweet began to form in my throat again. _Don't cry. Don't cry._

"It's okay!" Queen Lucy consoled, putting an arm around my shoulder. I suppose my anguish had showed itself on my face. "It really is wonderful here. There's parties, and festivals, and you should _see _Susan shoot an arrow. She's fantastic."

I let out a small laugh before saying, "Thank you, Queen Lucy, I-"

"You can call me Lucy" she told me, letting her arm from my shoulder drop.

"Thank you, Lucy," I said softly, entering a very busy hall which was full of the creatures she had told me about. Other than Evangeline, I hadn't seen anything out of the ordinary, and now they were all out in one compact spot.

"Magical creatures," I noted, and Lucy held my arm.

"Are you okay?" she asked kindly, yet her voice was still laced with concern.

"I'm fine," I answered, though viewing a huge centaur I saw in fantasy books when I was younger right in front of me, I became a bit nauseous. "Trust me," Lucy solaced. "Narnia has a lot to offer, just give it a chance."

"I believe it," I told her, releasing a nervous laugh as Evangeline walked by me, giving me a brief smile and wave before returned to work.

Lucy continued to give me a tour of the castle, which once again proved to leave me wordless. The most glorious room was the dining hall, which had a long table down the center. Lucy said it is moved to the side during parties, and I pictured all the people dancing in the huge room before we went to our next destination.

She showed me the sleeping quarters I was staying, the guest quarters, which I failed to notice had a communal living space in the middle with all the other humans and creatures staying in the castle. It took up one side of an entire floor level, so I figured Narnia always had a lot of guests. The monarchs sleeping quarters was up a floor and she showed it to me quickly before she decided it was time to go outside.

At the stables outside, she introduced me to some talking horses, and then showed me the armory where the Kings prepare for practice. There was also an archery field, further down down a dirt path. There were both humans and animals walking and talking everywhere, but I seemed to be getting more used to it.

We didn't go down to the beach, but we did see it briefly on our walk back up to the castle. Once inside she showed me the library which was, just like everything else here, absolutely incredible. It was a huge room, and there were shelves that lined the walls and stood alone in the center so that I couldn't tell how big it actually was.

"And this concludes our tour!" she said happily. I smiled and thanked her for her help, and after I did she said, "I hope you'll be able to find something to do in here for now, I'm afraid that I must go to a council meeting."

"I think I'll be set," I told her, looking around at all the books. "And I thought King Peter had a lot of books in his study!"

She laughed and bid me farewell with a big smile on her face. I'm glad someone as optimistic and bright as Lucy was here in Narnia to help me out.

I turned back to all the shelves that were in this ginormous room and tried to find a place to start. I decided to sit in a soft, velvet chair towards the back, and I began looking at books that were in a stack next to the chair on the floor, most of which I found to be of history. I looked through one briefly before setting it aside for later and sat with my legs crossed on the ground.

I pulled out a book from the shelf and leaned my head up against the chair lightly, scanning through its pages. I didn't really know what it was about, but I started reading anyway.

I don't know how long I was in that library, it could have been a day for all I knew, but I found it very comforting to know that if my mind were ever to drift again to what _could _have happened, I could open a book and leave this whole world behind.

* * *

**That's chapter three, I hope you enjoyed it! If there are any mistakes or things that seem confusing, please review and let me know. I'm open to all forms of criticism, big and small! **


	4. Priorities

Susan

"High King Peter, the girl is here," Evangeline called through the door. Instinctively I, as well as Lucy, Caspian, and Edmund, looked to him for his answer as we sat in his study.

"I'll get her in a minute," he answered, with impatience lacing his tone. "You are dismissed, Evangeline."

The presence behind the door seemed to disappear, and after a moment I heard a small _click_ from outside.

"At the least she's not from the year 2000," I said half-heartily, trying to lighten the mood. Looking at my older brother, I still couldn't figure out why he let this endeavor _really _get to him. Normally he was capable of handling much worse things without letting them get under his skin.

"Didn't think you would be the one to crack the joke," Edmund noted quietly to me, and I rolled my eyes at him. I waited for somebody to say something else on the actual matter of the girl, but suddenly they all seemed unwillingly to talk. Peter was firm in his spot, two fingers pinching the sides of his nose in obvious hindrance. Lucy sat next to me, her head up as it always was, but quiet. Maybe she didn't want to upset him any more than she already had. Caspian stood off to the side, leaning against a book case, eyes on the floor. Edmund seemed to be like me, standing behind my chair, waiting for an answer.

"We're approaching this too literally," I said finally, and although Peter looked up and shot me a confused look, I continued. "This is Aslan we are talking about. There's nothing we can do. She's a human from our world, not some homeless bum from the street."

"I think they're mad their plans are ruined," Lucy stated pointedly at Peter and Caspian, both of their smug appearances still present on their faces. Briefly, Caspian and I locked eyes, but I looked away from his gaze instantly once they met.

"This isn't about that, Lucy," Peter argued, but I knew he was, at least, partially lying. "It's been worrying me, though, because whenever Aslan sends a human to our world, something changes. I mean, look at us," he said his last statement with exasperation in his tone. "Look what we've done. How can we look at this in any other way than how the facts lay out?"

"Did everything I just told you roll over your head?" I questioned, appearing unmoved from my seat in front of his desk.

"Sue, what are you talking about?"

His annoying demeaning compelled me to stand up and shake the foolishness off of him, or just simply tell him to stop acting like this wasn't affecting everyone, but I held my spot in the chair and decided glaring would suffice. "There's nothing we can do."

He met my gaze, letting his hand fall from his face. It was like telepathically I told him _Get a grip, you big idiot _as I watched him stand and walk towards the door.

"I'll get her," he said, running a hand through his hair. "What should I do?"

"Just shake her hand," Lucy said simply. "The last thing you should do is expect a curtsy."

For some reason, that comment made us all smile; even just for a moment, but then it was back to big, bad, arrogant Peter as he strolled out of his study looking like nothing more than a king. When he was gone, I gave Lucy a look of annoyance, and as she shook her head with wide eyes I couldn't help but smirk. Edmund gave me the same look. It seemed pretty clear we were on a completely different boat now.

* * *

I was walking down the east hallway of the third floor, looking to find Eleanor, when I turned and saw Lucy running up from behind me.

"Susan!" she gasped, almost out of breath. "Come quickly! There's a letter for you from Archenland."

I rolled my eyes. "You didn't have to run to get me, Lu. I would have to come eventually."

"You don't understand," she persisted, grabbing my arm and pulling me the other way. "Prince Solomon wants to ask for your hand in marriage!"

My eyes widened at the words she just spoke to me as my stomach dropped.

"That's what Peter told me, at least," she said more calmly. "It came yesterday morning."

"What?" I screeched, unable to control my anger towards him any further. "Peter knew about this for _a day?"_

Her face showered with concern at my sudden outburst, but after a moment she said, "That seems to be right."

"And he had time to read it, yet he didn't have time to tell me about it," I said incredulously, mostly to myself.

"I suppose so," she said quietly, disrupting my thought on the matter. "It's not really his fault though, Sue. I mean, a lot has been going on…"

"No, believe me. This is entirely his fault," I countered, holding my hand up as I headed in the direction of his study. Turning the next corner, I heard her call something after me, but I didn't bother to look back at her.

I came to his study door, which I opened roughly, and glared at the man who still had the authority to call himself High King.

"Sue…" he said, giving me a look of confusion. "What's going on?"

I stepped toward his desk and reached for the letter which was clearly displayed on top.

"What's this?" I said, picking up the letter and waving it lightly in his face, which softened as he spoke,

"See for yourself."

"Pete, this isn't about the letter," I seethed, placing it down on his desk where it was before. "This is about _you. _You are so wrapped up in your own situation that you forget that everyone else has something to say. Yes, you are High King, but you're also our brother. You can only go so far as king without us, so stop pretending like you're the only one in this battle."

I exhaled heavily, a slight weight lifting off of my shoulders as I watched him run a hand through his hair.

"Is that all?" he said, subtly avoiding my gaze as he brought his hand down.

"No," I decided, and then I picked up the letter again.

"I get what this means, Pete, but this was the last straw," I waved the letter close to his face. "The first was you and Caspian fighting all these years. I understand that sometimes there must be debate to get the best answer, but not _all the time._ Be a man and grow up."

He stood from his spot with wide eyes and clenched his teeth. I continued to speak anyway.

"The second was for what happened yesterday, because for the first time in your life things did not go the way the _Magnificent _High King wanted them to, so he throws a temper tantrum. The third was the letter, and putting your arrogant, kingly ass before everything else. Everything you do affects us all. You're not the only one with problems and this certainly is not the last one we will have to deal with."

"I only put my priorities before yours because I'm not as ignorant as the rest of you!" he yelled, slamming his hand on the desk.

"Then why do you have so many people ruling along your side?" I scoffed. "If you're so smart, then why doesn't Aslan have you rule on your own?"_  
_

To my complete surprise, Peter shot me a look which was full of concern. He slowly seated himself but I remained standing over the desk, the letter being creased in my hand.

"Sue..." he drifted off. "Aslan came to me a few months ago. He told the prophecy's changed. _Changed. _How does it just do that? I've been trying to keep it from you all but I didn't want to hurt you. I though I could handle it on my own as long as I made the decisions myself, and I'm sorry if it's frustrated you but believe me, I still care just as much as I did the first day I stepped in Narnia."

"Yeah. You were arrogant back then, too," I retorted, but succumbing to sitting in the chair. "Tell me what's going on."

"There's not much to tell," he said, in a way I could tell was earnest. "He came to me in a dream, and told me the prophecy has changed because of one thing that has happened. He didn't give me a lot to go off of."

"That is all?" I asked, thinking of everything he had just revealed to me.

"Yes, what else do you want?" he implored. I exhaled and looked him straight in the eye.

"Well, now that you've talked, I can tell when you're lying," I said slyly. He bit his lip and looked down.

"Aslan also told me one more thing," he said finally, meeting my heavy gaze.

"What was it?"

Peter took a breath, and then said reluctantly to me, "Because of this _change, _we stayed with Caspian in Narnia after we defeated Miraz."

I furrowed my brows in confusion, so he elaborated.

"If it wasn't for this change, we would be back in England. The old prophecy had it so we would go back to Earth after we helped Caspian. Just one thing, that's all it was, but I can't begin to even wonder what it could have been that affected our lives so drastically."

"We would be back in England?" I repeated in disbelief. "What could have possibly happened that changed everything?"

"I've been asking myself that question for weeks, and I still have no idea," he answered, dropping his head slightly. I turned my head to look out the window and noticed it was now raining, the water droplets hitting the glass constantly, one after another. How did I not hear that sound before?

"Anyway," he started, causing me to turn my head back to him. "I don't know if Aslan wanted you to know this, or just for us to be aware of it, but for the time being, do you think we could just keep it below radar?"

I nodded, just as I slight knock was on the door.

"Come in," Peter called, giving me a knowing look before seeing Lucy enter the room.

"Time to head down for dinner," she casually stated, looking between the two of us. Without a word, we both headed out of his study and into the hall with our younger sister.

At dinner, I felt a huge weight had lifted off my shoulders as I ate with my family, laughing at the jokes that were made. I could see how Peter felt the same way as well. _Talking_ certainly brought us a step closer to whatever the answer was.

I chuckled lightly to myself as I remembered about the letter, which I hadn't even gotten a chance to read, and made a note to look it over later. _Prince Solomon. _I hoped he was just as kind as his father.

As soon as I began thinking of this, a statement Lucy made about how she was getting to be better at archery than me caused me to interject.

"I'll believe it when I see it," I smiled. "Some things just never change."

"Yeah, well, I'll probably surprise you then," she countered jokingly, and I chuckled, turning to my younger brother who seemed very quiet during the meal.

"Ed, is something wrong?" I worried, noticing his concerned look.

"Yeah..." he drifted off, and then looked across the table. "Has anyone seen Eleanor in awhile?"

Oh, no. I remembered I was looking for her a couple hours ago. We all turned to Lucy for an answer, but she shook her head. "I haven't seen her since I brought her to the library this morning."

Peter and I exchanged a worried glance as Lucy put her napkin down.

"I'll go find her," she proposed. "I was the last to see her so it's my responsibility."

"No, I'll go, Lu," Peter insisted, standing up. "You've played babysitter enough for today."

"It isn't babysitting, I'm her friend," she countered, and I couldn't help but smile at what she said.

I watched as Peter just rolled his eyes as he backed away towards the door. "Well, whatever it was, I'll give you the rest of the day off."

* * *

**Author's Note: Hope all my readers are still enjoying this. A special thanks to "seclue" for being a huge support for my story. I love you all. Review/critique whatever you like! All ideas are appreciated! **


	5. One More Time

Peter

As soon as I stepped outside, the distant figure of Trumpkin became clear in my vision. He gave me a forced half-smile as I approached.

"Have you seen Eleanor lately, Trumpkin?

"Not since this morning, I'm afraid," he replied, shaking his head. "Why do you ask, Sire?"

"Just haven't seen her in a while, that's all," I answered. "It's nothing, really. Ed just noticed nobody's seen her for a few hours so I told them I'd go looking."

Trumpkin raised an eyebrow at me. "Are you sure?"

"Positive," I said confidently. "I'll find her. The last thing we need right now is a full-blown search for the girl."

Trumpkin returned my statement with a skeptical look, which I shook my head at, and then lightly proceeded down the hallway, keeping my eyes open. What mattered now was finding Eleanor as fast as possible.

This proved to be harder than I thought, I came to understand, because even after searching every cavern and catacomb of the castle, I still was no closer to discovering where she was than when I began talking to Trumkpin.

The idea had dawned on me that maybe Caspian had been right, and this thought alone made my skin crawl. One of the things I hated most was a big, fat _I told you so _from the man who hadn't even been ruling Narnia half the time I have. With that idea aside, it still was hard for me to believe she could be any sort of criminal or spy. The biggest lead I had that she wasn't was the fact that she knew of London. If there were people in this world who knew of Earth, _dangerous_ people, then what would happen to Narnia? Is this how Aslan wanted it to be?

I did have the space in my mind to think about all these questions anymore, because when I met Evangeline in the guest quarters while looking for the girl, she had a fit. Of course she meant well, and she did her job exceptionally, but after spending more than five minutes with the anxiety-prone dryad I found myself getting a headache.

"When did you last see her, again?" she said to me, following her question with a quick _Eleanor? _that echoed throughout the halls.

"I haven't seen her since in my study earlier today," I responded quickly. Evangeline let out a frustrated sigh next to me as we walked so I added, "But Lucy said she gave her a tour of the castle and left her in the library only a few hours ago," for her sake. Though that didn't do much, she seemed a hair more satisfied as she hurriedly asked, "You checked the library, if I am correct, your majesty."

"Yes, it was one of my first stops. I looked through. Nobody was there."

She nodded as we continued the search in silence, the only noise being the occasional _Eleanor? _that Evangeline thought was necessary.

"You don't think she ran away, do you?" she asked suddenly, passing by a stone column which she meticulously looked behind. I hadn't even thought of that, but it did seem to make more sense than a person from this world knowing of London, my siblings and myself aside.

"That's definitely a possibility," I said, thinking realistically now that she was nowhere to be found, even after all this searching.

"What a shame," Evangeline said sadly, shaking her head slightly. "She was a nice girl, very respectful towards everyone. She even insisted she do everything herself, but I told her I was here to help."

I nodded my head thoughtfully, realizing Evangeline probably knew the girl better than anyone even though they had spent a modicum of time together.

"That seems to make more sense than a spy running back to Calormen," I said dryly. She turned to show me a just as sad look, if not more, but hastily went make into anxiety mode.

"Where to next?"

"I don't know," I said honestly. "I checked everywhere. It was hard enough having her here because none of us knew _why_, but if she ran away, what do you think would happen to her?"

"If she was alone, she wouldn't make it, but if she found somebody she could trust, then I'm sure she would be alright for the time being," she answered logically.

"But what about after that?" I asked, and she gave me a confused look so I added, " After _for the time being."_

"Creatures start asking."

"Asking what?"

"Asking _who you are, what do you want, where have you come from_," she looked straight forward as she spoke. "The only humans from this 'Earth' are you and your siblings, so if another one came along, the rest of Narnia would think it's a conspiracy."

"But more humans from this world have come to Narnia since the beginning of our reign with Caspian. _And, _it would be easier to blend in," I added.

"Yes, but how many creatures do you know would allow some strange girl to board in their home if she refuses to say anything?"

"She could lie," I retorted as we turned a corner, heading back to the dining hall.

"If she lies, she will be found out," Evangeline stated with confidence lacing her tone. "I may have spent very little time with her, your majesty, but she is humble, and timid. At least, that is how she acted around me. If she's like that _out there_," she pointed out towards the ocean which showed itself through the stone columns on one side of the hallway, "She will be found out, that is with saying, she lies."

"So unless she does everything right, she's a goner."

"Exactly," Evangeline replied, and suddenly all my thoughts of feeling empathy for her sadness were gone. It seems our conversation took the path of making her feel more betrayal than sorrow.

I looked at the dryad next to me who was still searching, like she had one small hope left that was telling her everything we just said was completely incorrect, but it seemed that light was dying out as we came closer and closer to the dining hall without the girl who was taken out of the dungeons only just like morning.

Only a moment later it seemed, we entered the two, tall double doors of the dining hall and met the anxious eyes of everyone else.

"We've been waiting," Lucy said as she stood up, noticing the absence of the girl. "You didn't find her."

I shook my head and met Caspian's glare, who sat at almost the very far end of the table. Even across the room, I could see the anger burning in his eyes. A brief _I told you so _flashed through them as well, it appeared. I ignored him.

"What should we do?" Edmund asked, following Lucy who began walking towards Evangeline and myself. "You looked everywhere?"

"Everywhere," we said monotonously.

"Should we try again?" Lucy asked hopefully. Once she saw my reluctant gaze she quickly added, "She just doesn't seem like that kind of person-"

"You barely knew her, Lucy," Susan interrupted, looking at my youngest sister. I could see the mix in the gaze she held on her sister, a mix of sadness, betrayal, and hope. Each feeling for each possible outcome of the situation. What an odd combination.

"Yes, I know, but humans _are _humans, and I could tell how she handled things, even in the little time I was with her."

"You know, they say first impressions are often entirely wrong," I remarked. Lucy's eyes dropped. "I'm sorry, Lu. Of course we didn't want this to happen, but it did. There is nothing we can do about it now."

She looked me straight in the eye and gave me the look that got her everything she wanted. "Please, Pete? Can we just look one more time?"

I turned to Caspian, who was still the farthest away from the conversation, and made my next move based on the look her gave me.

"One more time."

My sister smiled brightly, and then quickly one after another, we exited in the great hall, the amount of hope varying in each one of us.

* * *

**Author's Note: I know this story may seem slow paced because we've only passed less than one day through five chapters, but I promise it will pick up soon. I didn't want to start each chapter with, "A week later...", and I'm pretty bad at varying the transition statements anyway****. I haven't gotten any reviews in a while, and although I'm no complainer, it really does help to see at least what some of you feel about the story. If you want to have a say in what I write, then tell me! Constructive criticism is lovely, and I would be so happy to know what my readers think of my work! :) **


	6. What a Mistake to Make

**Sorry! This wait was longer than I expected! I jammed my finger in a door, so now I'm wearing a splint, which you can imagine does not make typing any easier! Anyway, enjoy!**

* * *

Edmund

As I left the library with only Caspian trailing closely behind me, I couldn't help but feel like this whole search was in vain. I don't understand why Lucy left Eleanor alone in the first place, because she could have more easily than not gotten lost in the castle. For us, it was easy to walk around; heck, I could probably make my way around here with my eyes closed, just that way of traveling was not the most convenient for indoors. She had only just gotten here, and as I walked further and further from the dining room doors in amazed me even more how all of this had only taken place over one day.

Caspian caught up to me as I was heading down to the library, away from everyone else.

"What are you thinking?" I asked, seeing the clear anger present in his demeanor.

"This is ridiculous," he said, clenching his teeth hard as he spoke. "We should be rounding up the troops, not walking around the castle casually hoping we'll run into here."

We continued walking and after a moment I said under my breath, "Do you think she's some sort of spy?"

After I asked this, he subtly checked the surroundings and then pulled me into the library.

"She's got access to everything, Ed," he seethed, shutting the door quietly as he spoke. "All the guards know who she is, but they also know that we think she's innocent. If she were to pass one by, she could simply say she was looking for Lucy or Evangeline. They would let her go."

I let his words sink in.

He elaborated. "Just think of it that way. Lucy showed her where everything is."

"She could be lost."

"I don't think she would be able to, with all the guards around."

"So you're saying this is Lucy's fault?" I said, defensively.

"I never said that," he answered, though something different was shown in his face. "It's everyone's fault equally."

"More you and Peter's," I muttered under my breath. Caspian frowned at me.

"Your brother-"

"Is just as arrogant as you," I finished, receiving a very hard glare from him as she sighed.

I was about to say something to him again, telling him to calm down or something, but my thoughts suddenly drifted as I realized we weren't the only people in the library. Only about twenty feet away, hidden partially from view by a cushioned chair was she. Eleanor. She was leaning up against the chairs twin, a stack of books by her side as she read. She sat, squished in between the books and the shelf next to her, with her legs stretched and crossed out in front of her. She either didn't even acknowledge our presence, or didn't realize we had entered the library at all. Caspian's gaze fell on where I was looking as she flipped a page of the book nonchalantly.

"Go find the rest of them," I said to Caspian softy, not taking my eyes off her. In my peripheral vision I saw him nod slowly and back towards the door, letting it close with a loud thud.

She didn't even notice.

I began walking closer to her, but still the creaks the floorboards made did not disturb her in the slightest. Now I stood right behind the chair she sat across from on the floor, and still she did not look up. The binding of the book was covered by her hand, so I could not tell what she was reading.

"Is it really that riveting?" I said very loudly, so I was sure she heard me. She abruptly looked up with wide eyes and I realized my fault. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"No, it's alright," she said breathlessly, standing up from her spot on the floor. "I just figured I'd learn more about Narnia since it appears I'll be staying here for a while."

I nodded knowingly, remembering how adjusting to Narnian life did not come easily as well. "History has always been a favorite of mine. You like reading?"

"I love it," she said instantly, putting down the book, smiling slightly. "It seems you wouldn't have to read any history books, King Edmund. You did live them."

"That is true," I said with a smile, and walked over to the wall behind her, reaching for a book a little higher than my height.

"When you finish history," I said, turning back to her and handing her the book. "This is a good one."

Her smile grew as she looked at the book I handed her and placed it on top of the stack at her feet. "Thank you."

As I was about to return her thanks, the opening of the library doors reverted my attention. Caspian waltzed into the room with Peter, Evangeline, Susan, and Lucy on his tail.

"I forgot to mention," I said under my breath to her, "We've been looking for you."

Eleanor turned back to the rest of them as Evangeline approached, throwing her arms up as she came closer.

"Don't ever do that again!" Evangeline yelled exasperatedly, holding Eleanor's face. "You've been here all this time?"

"Where else would I be?" she answered with wide eyes, looking to everyone else as the nervous dryad stepped away from her.

"Peter, I thought you said you checked the library," Susan said irritably, looking to our oldest brother.

"I did!" he said, appearing stunned. "I didn't even notice he was here. I called, but there was no answer."

"Well, she did seem very interested in that book," Caspian remarked as confusion sprung onto her face. "You say you were here _the whole time_?"

Caspian glanced at me, to which I saw a look of unease in his eyes. All Eleanor did was look around at the lot of us, meeting my eyes for a brief moment, her mouth slightly open. It seemed some sort of realization had hit her. "I-I never left. I promise. I'm very sorry to have caused any trouble, I really am. But I can assure you I have not left this room since Queen Lucy dropped me off hours ago."

"No, it's my fault," Peter said, swatting away her statement. "I should have looked better."

I'm sure Pete was embarrassed about his mistake, so it seemed he didn't want to argue on the subject any further. It also seemed after that some were either too stunned or irritated to stay any longer, so as Eleanor stood in the same spot, speechless, Peter, Caspian, Susan, and Evangeline left the library in their own fits of conversation.

Lucy turned to Eleanor, her mouth still slightly open from the past events.

"Are you alright?" Lucy asked carefully, stepping closer to us.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," she replied, her eyes fixed on something right above Lucy's head.

After a moment, she didn't say anything, so Lucy said half-heartily. "Alright, well, why do we take a walk outside? It's really nice out, and I assume you've had enough of this room for the day."

"Yeah," she said with a small smile, though I could tell by the way she looked back at the books on the floor that she wouldn't mind staying in here for weeks.

"C'mon, Ed!" Lucy called, almost to the door with Eleanor right behind her. I straightened up from where I leaned against a wall and headed outside with them.  
Once on the beach, Lucy and I began talking about how nice the weather had been, which is has, but I noticed that Eleanor remained especially quiet during the conversation. As there was a break in the conversation, she finally piped up by saying,

"Queen Lucy, King Edmund, I couldn't help but notice the books in the library aren't alphabetized."

I exchanged a very confused look with my sister, before she chose to respond first.

"Eleanor, I barely know you," she started, looking to the girl who stood on the other side of me, "But what would make you think of that, _now_?"

Eleanor laughed slightly as she responded. "I've just been thinking about all the things I could do here," she looked between Lucy and me, "And I wanted to thank all of you for letting me stay."

"You don't need to do anything for us, Eleanor," Lucy said, waving her hand. "Just enjoy your time here, that's all we want you to do."

"But what exactly am I going to do to fill that time? I may as well may use of myself."

A moment passed.

"That…would…actually be helpful," Lucy said slowly, looking to me. I could tell in her expression that she realized it wasn't worth fighting for anymore. "We've haven't been able to keep those books organized since we restored Cair Paravel a couple years ago.

Eleanor nodded, a small smile forming on her face.

"You really love books, don't you?" I said jokingly, trying to put away any tension that was left. They both laughed, but after only a few seconds I noticed the smile had run away from Eleanor's face. Although I was king, and I was entitled to ask her whatever I wanted, I was slightly hesitant when I turned my head in her direction and said, "That's not all that's bothering you, is it?"

She met my gaze, shrugged, and then took a deep breath. "It seems like some of the monarchs don't trust me."

"Well, no offense, but we did just meet you," Lucy said blatantly. Eleanor's head jerked quickly over to my sister.

"I know, and I understand that's how you feel," she shook her head and looked down, like she couldn't find the right words to say.

"I would never take advantage of a situation like this," she said finally, perking up, looking at us both. "And I know that you don't know me, and I know that whatever I say right now could be total bull to you, but I just want to let you know that's not who I am and I'm not the kind of person who would do something like that. I still barely even _know _what Calormen is."

We both managed to smile at her last statement, but seemed uneasy at what the right thing to say was.

"I'm sure you'll understand all of it, eventually," Lucy said, surprisingly happy after what Eleanor had just said, and turned to us both. "We should probably head back up to the castle. It's getting late."

She turned and waltzed back to the pathway, leaving Eleanor and I looking out to the sun which both of us had just realized was setting.

"It's very beautiful," she said, almost as if in a dream. I nodded.

"I'm sure you'll find Narnia is very much so. The very end of spring is always a wonderful time to see."

She nodded as well, and looked back at Lucy, who had already made it halfway up the path to the castle.

"You're sister is very different," she said to me, and quickly added, "But in a good way. She's great to be around."

I chuckled, turned my heel and started walking back. Eleanor did the same. "She's always been like that. She's the closest with Aslan, you see. She's got the most faith out of us all."

"Who's Aslan, again?" she asked casually.

"The real ruler of Narnia. A great lion. He's the reason humans have come to this place."

She nodded thoughtfully, and we continued our walk back in silence. Not an awkward silence, though, a silence that held us both in the fact we were content on not saying a word at all. It was strange, but it was fine. She seemed like the type of person who was better at talking than listening, unlike Lucy, who could become best friends with a brick wall.

"It's been a lovely walk, King Edmund," Eleanor said, once back at the castle doors. "But I'm afraid now that if I don't head back soon, Evangeline will get worried."

"I understand," I responded, thinking of how anxious Evangeline could get sometimes. "It has been a pleasure. I'm sure I'll see you soon."

"I'm sure," she said, smiling and walking into the castle, and then quickly before I realized, out of my sight.

As I began walking down another corridor myself, going nowhere in particular, I found Lucy walking into the dining hall.

"Hey! Where'd you go?" I said, running up to her. She stopped in the doorway.

"Just around."

"Yeah, but you just left."

"I didn't even notice," she said sheepishly. "I suppose only the sunset held me at that point."

"Guess so," I said pointedly, causing her to laugh. "Oh Ed, was she really that boring?"

My eyes widened. "No. I was just wondering where you went."

"Okay, then," she drawled, giving me a weird look before entering the dining hall. I swear some days I thought I had finally mastered the ways of the opposite gender, and others I fell into complete oblivion. What an odd thing for her to say.

* * *

**I realize a lot of my reviewers are anons, and I feel bad because I can't reply to any of you, so here's an idea: I will put all replies in the author's note with that person's name labeling it. What does everyone think?**


	7. What's in a Name?

**The purpose of this chapter is character development, especially in the way that Eleanor is growing closer to Lucy and Evangeline and further away from the other monarchs because of their differences, so sorry if it's a drag. Please let me know what you think. I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Eleanor

As I reached for some books on the top shelf of the library, leaning slightly over the swinging ladder on which I stood, the whereabouts of Sophia randomly entered my mind.

It was hard balance; between moving on and getting over it, but still holding her in my memory for the sake of where I've come from. How could I keep a hold on her when it caused me so much sorrow, and when I knew I would probably never see her again? It was like a double-edged sword, because when I did think, I wished I didn't, but when I didn't, I felt guilty. I loved her. She kept me sane while we were together without anyone else, and she was free. Somewhere, deep down, I knew that if she saw the predicament I found myself in right now she would say something like _Get a grip, El. You've got to let go._

Without realizing why, I released a small smile. That is _exactly _what she would say.

"Are you sure you're up for this, Eleanor?" Evangeline asked, clearly nervous I would hurt myself being so far up. She and Lucy sat below me on the ground in matching chairs, positioned around a small table. I'm assuming the monarchs decided I should never be left alone anymore.

Not that I minded that much, especially with these two. "I'm fine, Evangeline, but thanks." I grabbed the books I needed and began descending the ladder.

"How exactly do you plan on doing all of this?" Lucy asked curiously, looking around the huge library as she spoke.

I stepped down from the ladder and made my way over to a large table and stacked the books, like I had been this whole morning, in order by the authors last name.

"I just have to go through all of them," I answered. "I don't imagine it to be strenuous on me, but it sure will take a long time."

"Yeah," Lucy said, as if in disbelief that I was still interested in completing this task, and then perked up. "We could play some sort of game to pass the time."

"That's a good idea, but what sort of game could we play?" asked Evangeline, leaning her elbow on the side table.

"We could play a word game," I said, climbing up the ladder once more. "The one-word story game. We go around and each say a word to make a story."

"That sounds fun," Lucy said, as I continued climbing to the top. "Can you hear us from up there?"

"Yeah!" I called back, and explained, "The sound bounces around with the high ceilings."

I imagined Lucy nodding before she said, "Okay. I'll start," she paused. "Once."

"Upon," Evangeline said.

"A," I said especially loud as I climbed another step.

"Time."

"There."

"Lived."

"A."

Evangeline stuttered, "D-dog."

"Named."

There was another pause. I predicted this would happen a lot. "Scruffy."

"Scruffy?" I asked incredulously, looking to Lucy who just smiled. "What's wrong with Scruffy?"

"It's just...I don't know... a _typical_ dog name," I answered, climbing another step. I heard the young queen scoff melodramatically as Evangeline continued. "Scruffy.

"Loved."

"To."

"Eat."

I paused, my foot hitched in the air between two steps. "Dragons," I decided, inspired by the cover of a nearby book.

"Must be a big dog," Evangeline noted, and we all laughed.

"Scruffy."

"Also."

"Loved," I drawled.

"To."

"Play."

"With."

"Badgers."

"Who."

"Could."

"Fly."

"Because."

"They," I added as I grabbed the last set of book on this wall, beginning my descent.

"Ate."

"Magical."

"Oh, I get a good one," I said happily, then decided with, "Chocolates."

I saw a smile pull itself at Lucy's lip. "The."

"Chocolates," Evangeline breathed out along with a laugh, obviously realizing how ridiculous this story was becoming.

"Had."

"Powers."

"Because."

"They."

"Were."

"Made."

"By."

"Trumpkin," Lucy said with a big smile, earning a laugh from Evangeline and myself. I had only met Trumpkin once but by his demeanor it seemed the last profession he would take up would be chocolate making.

"Trumpkin."

"Secretly."

"Works."

"For."

"The."

"Service," she chuckled, and we all were teetering on the edge of hysterics for a very bizarre reason. I realized now I held the books to my chest as I leaned against the ladder, across from Lucy and Evangeline who sat, so I made my way over to the table to sort the books with a wide-toothed smile on my face.

"Trumpkin."

"Is."

"Upset," Lucy said again. I turned to her with my finger sticking out. "You're turning this into gossip."

"It isn't gossip," Lucy said, but she smirked. "At least I hope it isn't."

As she spoke those words I couldn't help but release a full laugh, which sent my arm out in front of me, knocking a pile of books over. I heard Evangeline and Lucy laugh as well as they saw me being a goof.

"Oh, you girls are silly," Evangeline said, sitting up. "Where were we?"

"Trumpking was upset," Lucy said instantly. "And I hoping to go for something like he was upset because somebody stole his magical chocolate recipe."

I shook my head in disbelief at the queen, standing up from the ground and putting the book back where I had them. "You know, you lied Lucy, because this isn't helping me getting the job done quicker at all."

She just laughed. "But it is funny. There once was a dog named Scruffy who played with badgers who could fly because they ate magical chocolates that Trumpkin made in his undercover job at the service."

"That doesn't even make sense!" I shrieked, but with a big smile, throwing my hands down. "What's the service?"

"I don't know, like an undercover spy group or something," Lucy answered, and as if that wasn't enough to make me laugh, Evangeline also added, "Your forgot! Scruffy also ate dragons!"

There was a moment of silence, a very distinct moment of silence, before we all began laughing hysterically, in free fall. I'm sure if I looked back at what had just happened, I wouldn't find it that funny, but none of that mattered. I hadn't had a good, earnest laugh like this in a long, long time.

Once we composed ourselves, Evangeline stood up. "You've got one wall done today, Eleanor. I think it's time we get out of the room before we loose all of our sanity."

I nodded. "What shall we do?"

Lucy huffed and leaned her head back against the chair, looking up at the ceiling. "I've got one of those blasted council meetings soon, so I suppose I should be heading over."

"What's so bad about that?" I asked her, genuinely curious.

She stood up next to Evangeline as she spoke in a rush. "It's all the same, and it's not like I have much of a say, being the baby of the group."

"But your words do count," Evangeline said optimistically. "Why, you certainly put King Peter and King Caspian in their places a few days ago."

She smiled at her, but I furrowed my brows in confusion. "What happened? If you don't mind me asking..."

"It had to do with you," Lucy said, and I suddenly became much more interested. "They were arguing, wasting time away, so I decided to let you go myself."

We were now heading towards the door, and I thought of what had happened as all those moments of yesterday flooded through my mind. "Well, thank you," was all I managed to say.

"It's nothing, really," she said, pushing the door open. We all stepped out into the hallway, heading in different directions. "I'll see you later!"

"Bye, Lucy!" I waved, and a sudden realization hit me that I dropped the formalities instinctively.

"Evangeline," I said, turning to the dryad as we began walking the other way. "Is it alright that I just called Lucy, well, 'Lucy'?"

"Oh, I'm sure," she said with a smile. "Lucy thinks of you as a friend now."

"She does?"

"Of course! For what reason does she have not to be?" she questioned, almost in disbelief that I would think in any other way. It just seemed weird, I hadn't made a friend in very long time and if someone had told me, back in the dungeons, that the young queen who freed me would become my friend...I wouldn't really have had the understanding to even consider believing that idea.

"I guess, nothing," I answered, turning to Evangeline.

She smiled back earnestly, though it seemed she didn't pick up on the debate I just had with myself inside my head. I didn't expect her to.

"Alright, well, we could go outside to the stables, or walk on the beach, or get an early lunch..." she drifted off. I knew I was completely ungrateful for thinking this, but I almost wanted some time to myself. All the commotion from the castle was a big step from barely talking to anybody at all.

"We could just keep walking and talking," I said, not particularly sided on anything else.

"Sure, sure," Evangeline said, and I suddenly seemed bizarre to me that we had been laughing together hysterically only a few minutes ago. A fear grew inside my stomach that it would only turn out to be a one-time thing.

"Evangeline, how did you make it to Narnia?" I asked suddenly, surprisingly myself a bit. The question just popped into my head.

She answered, "I've always been in Narnia. Dryads are the spirits of trees, you see."

"How did you make it to castle?"

"Cair Paravel?" she asked, and I nodded. "Well, normally we stay hidden in the forests. That's where my family lies. But Narnia made me curious, especially humans, and all the animals living just like them."

"What do you mean?"

"Humans are timekeepers," she said with a certain air of passion around her. "Before the monarchs came back, there were animals and spirits, but it was like we were locked away. The usurper Miraz caused great oppression, so most didn't keep track of the days," a sad look appeared on her face. "It wasn't worth it. What was important was survival. Most dryads didn't even show themselves during that time."

"So what happened when it was over?"

"We were awakened," Evangeline replied, her gaze fixed on something in front of us. "And like I said, humans are timekeepers. Once the Sons of Adam and Daughters of Eve came, time was easier to keep track of. And with time, you realize that nothings lasts forever, and you can't keep waiting one day for your whole life to change."

"Huh," I said softly. "But one day something did happen, for you, when the monarchs came."

"Yes, and I'm very grateful," she told me. "And once that happened, and I realized I had all these opportunities, I figured that I had to act soon, because its only a matter of _time_ before things change."

"Do you think things will ever go back to the way they were?"

"I hope not, because I like being around all these creatures. It makes me anxious," she said sheepishly, earning a laugh from me, "But I've found something worth living for."

"That's lovely," I answered. "The way you said that."

"Said what?"

"Just everything about time and discovering what you want to become," I said, thinking of how I spent my whole life waiting. "I was stuck, and now I'm not, so I suppose I should be grateful, too."

She smiled.

"Though, I think I'm destined to shelve books, and you are destined to follow me around wherever I go. Sorry about that," I replied jokingly.

She laughed. "It's quite alright, maybe something better will come up."

"Like dishes..."

"I don't think _dishes _is better, Eleanor."

I shrugged and turned my gaze to her. She smiled, and I smiled back, and as this happened I could feel that fear inside my stomach slowly melt away.

"You know, they write books about things like you where I'm from," I laughed. "I can remember being little and reading books like that all the time."

"You always liked reading?"

I scrunched my nose for a moment. "Yes, but back then it was for enjoyment. Now, it's to escape."

"I see," she nodded curtly, looking forward. "Well, I told you all about me, now it's your turn."

My head jerked itself towards her in surprise. "You didn't tell me _everything _about you."

"You know what I mean," she said, a smile forming on her face. "But nobody wants to know _everything _about someone."

"Touche," I answered slyly, making her smile. She gave me a pressing look once her eyes fixed themselves on me once again, so I continued. "I lived on the coast when I was very young, a very small town in England which I don't remember the name of anymore. I had just turned ten, and my parents and brother disappeared in a fire that destroyed our home. My sister and I went to live in London, and around the time she was ten she got relocated to live with a foster family. One night, I decided to go looking for her, so I just ran for it."

"So you just ran into Narnia?" Evangeline asked, and I nodded. "I'm not really sure how it happened, it just did. And I've heard people saying it has to do with this Aslan character, but I'm not even sure of that either."

Evangeline nodded at me, and then spoke with a surprising amount of sorrow in her tone. "You're very vague, Eleanor."

I turned to her. "Sorry?"

She then shook her head and looked down. After a moment, she met my eyes and spoke again. "Isn't it true that humans from that world have two names?"

"Yes, why?"

"Well, the monarchs, meaning Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy, have the name Pevensie. Why didn't you tell anyone yours?"

"Nobody wondered, so I didn't bother to say," I answered truthfully. "And when I found out most of the beings here only had one name, like yourself, I thought it would be easier to explain."

She nodded. "So what's yours?"

My breath hitched. I hadn't actually said it in years, and I was ashamed of the fact it took me a moment to remember. Finally I managed to say, "Eleanor Jane Astley."

"Three names?" Evangeline said in disbelief.

"Yes, most people have middle names as well," I explained, but she gave me a confused look. "It isn't that complicated. Middle names are only really used for important documents."

"I see," she said, but in way in which I wasn't sure whether or not she was speaking the truth. "Well, it's nice to meet you, Eleanor Jane Astley."

"It's nice to meet you too, Evangeline," I said, laughing slightly.

"My name doesn't sound as regal as yours," she said half-heartily.

"Regal?"

"Yes, regal. It's nice and long. Sounds official."

"Evangeline is a lovely name, though," I told her. She raised an eyebrow at me.

"I'm telling the truth!" I said, objecting her skepticism.

She laughed, and it was then I noticed that we had made it to the very edge of a balcony on one of the floors, the ocean right out in front of us. I could hear it. It was almost as if I reached my hand out into the air, I would feel small water droplets touch my skin, despite the wonderful weather.

"What's in a name, anyway?" I wondered, mostly to myself, but she answered.

"I'm not really sure. Apparently my name means "bearer of good news". What an odd reason for a name? Certainly all news can't be good, and it's nothing reflecting my character. I try to be optimistic, but I think you can tell how I get sometimes."

I grinned at her small tangent. "I have no idea what my name means, I think my parents just liked it."

"Well I would hope so!" she grinned, and we both turned to face the ocean.

"But I understand what you mean," she said after a moment, and I turned my head to meet her gaze. "_What's in a name? _It doesn't show anything about who you are."

"I like talking to you, Evangeline," I said suddenly. She cocked her head, and I elaborated. "You make me think, make me see different sides of things. It's different than what I'm used to."

"Well, I'm glad you enjoy _thinking_," she joked, turning back to the ocean.

"You never seemed like the type who would crack a joke when I first met you," I said, adding a quick, "No offense."

"None taken," she laughed. "I completely understand. I'm very anxiety-prone. I think the hustle and bustle of the castle just gets to me, sometimes."

"You still do like it, don't you?" I asked quickly, slightly concerned.

"Of course I do! I'm just constantly growing out and in of things, that's all. It's how we all work."

"You're very wise," I noted.

"Thanks," she smiled. "I've only been around for a couple thousand years."

* * *

**Review, review, review! Please? Twenty seconds of your time will make my entire day!**


	8. Nothing Important

Edmund

The familiar sound of voices was erupting from the dining hall as I entered one morning. Everyone was seated at the table for breakfast, even Eleanor, and I quickly sat myself as well before the servants began to prepare to serve the food. To my right, Peter and Susan were talking from across the table to each other in hushed whispers, and I couldn't help but notice how nobody else had bothered to ask them what they were talking about. On the other side of me, Eleanor and Lucy were making small talk with Caspian.

"Yes, but what does it mean?" I heard Peter whisper. I couldn't help but intrude.

"What does what mean?" I asked curiously.

They both turned to stare at me, with wide eyes, and Susan's mouth opened slightly as if she planned on replying. It quickly shut, however, because all our attention was put on the food that has just been served for breakfast. Both of their gazes turned away from me. They got lucky this time.

Breakfast went by quickly, with only small topics of conversation being touched upon between mouths of food. Eleanor seemed to be leading the conversation, which was a bit odd because of the inconvenience her arrival had caused. I had nothing against her, but I could tell the tension hadn't been totally diffused between her, Peter, Susan, and Caspian. I suppose she was growing on them though, because I noticed the first couple times she ate with us they could barely even look at her. Now as she spoke, the words rolling off her tongue she had been waiting to speak them, Caspian saw her. Probably for the first time, and more than just a fragile little damsel in distress sent from Earth, how he had perceived her. At least I hoped this, because it seemed that we would be stuck with her for a long time. We may as well tolerate it.

After the meal was complete and everyone's plates were empty, I stayed behind with Lucy and Eleanor as the others had decided to leave early. I couldn't help but hear something Eleanor said that instantaneously triggered a memory of mine from a long time ago.

"What's in a name?" I repeated, taking a sip of juice and then swallowing. "Isn't that from _Romeo and Juliet_?"

Both girls gave me a quizzical look, but Eleanor quickly replied, "I'm not sure. Evangeline and I were talking about names yesterday, and that's what I wondered. I didn't know it was from anything."

"I didn't ever read that in school, but I remember hearing about it vaguely," Lucy added. "Did you ever read it Eleanor?"

She shook her head. "I haven't read any books from Earth in a long time."

"Well, basically, that line is from _Romeo and Juliet," _I explained, looking to Eleanor who held my gaze. "Juliet is standing on the balcony when she says this, realizing how unlucky her predicament is because she has fallen in love with the only son of her family's great enemy. As she thinks about this, she begins to understand that even if Romeo didn't have that name, she would still like him. A rose by a different name would still smell as sweet."

Eleanor gave me an earnest smile. "That sounded lovely, King Edmund, but I'm afraid I don't really understand anything you just said."

Lucy released a short laugh as she stood up and pushed her chair in. "Why don't you tell her more about that, Ed? Since she missed out on it…" she looked between Eleanor and me. "I'd love to come, but I think Susan said I'm having dresses fitted for next week."

"Oh, well, see you later, Lucy," Eleanor said, smiling, as she stood up. Lucy turned and left the dining hall, and as I watched her go Eleanor asked, "What's next week?"

"No idea," I answered, still looking away from her as I stood as well. "Do you really want me to tell you all about it?"

"Of course," she said instantly, walking past me and heading towards the door. "If you don't mind…"

"I don't at all," I said, maybe a little too quickly. She turned back to me and grinned, her brown eyes gleaming in the sunlight, and I couldn't help but smile as well.

* * *

"Did Lucy not already tell you to call us by our first names?" I inquired, sitting in a plaid-printed chair of the library as Eleanor shelved some books nearby.

"Possibly, but I only took that for her," she answered, not turning to face me as she spoke. I felt bad, just watching her as she worked, but what else could I do?

"You promised you explained the books Edmund, remember?" she called, knocking me out of my thoughts.

"_I _never said you could call me by my first name, Eleanor," I countered jokingly. This time she turned to face me as she retorted.

"That's just what I assumed you were trying to get to," she said as she looked me straight in the eye. I leaned forward and answered, "You were correct. Now what is it you want me to tell you?"

"You covered _Romeo and Juliet_," she stated, turning back to the shelf. "Tell me about Shakespeare. Did every one of his stories end in death?"

"He did write a lot of tragedies, and there was lots of death," I acknowledged, straightening up. Eleanor finished shelving those books and crossed the room to grab another stack as I stood. "Let me help you with that."

"Edmund, I'm the one who volunteered to do this, not you," she insisted defiantly, holding the books firmly at her side.

"I could just them as you shelf them," I offered. "It's awkward for me to just sit and watch as work."

She rolled her eyes. "Alright, well, for the sake of your _awkwardness," _she managed a smile as she complied, handing me the books. I was lead over to the shelf where she had just stood before and stayed on the ground as she climbed the ladder a few steps, grabbing a book I held along the way. "Is that all her wrote?"

"Tragedies? No…" I drifted off as she met eyes to get another book and put it away. "He also wrote comedies and romances."

"Sounds like a pretty normal author."

"I guess you could say he was profound."

"Why could I say that?"

"He was just really, really good at what I did, I suppose," I vouched. "And he was one of the first."

"Hmm," was all she said. I could tell I was boring her.

"Sorry, I didn't really do much research on him. Plus I don't remember much," I disclosed.

"It's fine. Tell me about the stuff you do remember," Eleanor suggested, looking right over my head. She stepped down off the ladder and then over to the table. Once she reached it, she turned to me and mimicked my motions, both hands stuck out, holding nothing at all.

"Sorry," I said, walking over to her and realized all the books had been shelved. "I drifted off for a moment there."

All she did was smile as she placed another stack of books in my arms, and then we repeated the same routine as before. This time I explained the book _The Adventures of Tom Sawyer_, which seemed to hold her attention better than Shakespeare in a nutshell. Sometimes I would catch her standing on the ladder above me, listening to my words as I spoke, completely still as I still held books in my hand. I continued with _The Hobbit, Great Expectations, _and even _Treasure Island_, and with each story I spoke of from back home, I could tell she was getting more and more lost in them. Shelving took longer, but she was a good listener.

For the fourth time that day, she stepped down of that ladder and waltzed over to the table. "Does Narnia have any profound pieces of literature?" she asked me with her back turned.

"A lot of it is history, but Cair Paravel only just got restored. All the books have only just been brought back, so it's hard to tell right now," I explained, and she nodded thoughtfully. "How did you get so interested in books, if you don't mind me asking?" I asked. Eleanor turned to me with a small shrug.

"My mother loved the arts and books," she explained, leaning against the table. "Reading was one of her favorite things to do."

"So you are a lot like her," I noted as she looked away from me. I recognized that look she had. It was one I noticed a lot, particularly in Susan and Lucy, when they wanted to say something but couldn't find the words.

"I hope so," she mumbled softly, jostling me out my thoughts. Her eyes met mine again. I gave her a sympathetic smile and dared to ask, "What happened?"

Her eyes glassed over in despondence, which made me feel guilty for even asking, but after a moment she straightened up and managed to say, "There was a fire."

"I'm sorry," I replied quickly, looking down.

"It's alright. It's only a bad memory now," she answered, almost brushing away the conversation entirely as she handed me the books. "You have the right to be curious. I basically just ran into this world and caused a burden for all of you."

"You're not a burden," I said earnestly. "As rulers we just have to take the appropriate measures when foreigners _run _into our country."

She smiled slightly as I emphasized what she had said before, and turned to the doorway as Caspian and Susan walked by. Something entirely different washed over in her eyes.

"Are they a thing?_" _she asked curiously, walking over to the shelf and then turning to me.

"I have no idea," I answered truthfully, giving her an exasperated look. "I honestly don't know what goes on between those two."

She nodded. "What makes you wonder that?" I asked suddenly. She shrugged and then replied sheepishly, "They just kept making eye contact at meals. I didn't want to gossip, just sometimes it seemed like they were mad at each other for looking."

"You're fine," I consoled, stepping towards her. "Don't worry about it. I haven't kept track of things like that since staying in Narnia with Caspian."

Eleanor set the books on a nearby shelf and sat on the ladder. "Can you tell me the whole story?"

I saw her eyes, completely covered in curiosity now, and replied, "Okay," while sitting in that plaid chair I sat in at the beginning of the day.

So I began, all the way back to the beginning when we were off to the Professor's, and Lucy found Narnia in a wardrobe. We soon all followed, and then our story in Narnia began; how we defeated the White Witch who claimed to be queen, and I became a ruler alongside my siblings. Many years later, we were taken back to Earth and then brought back to Narnia only a year later to help Caspian defeat the usurper Miraz. Once we were successful, Aslan said we could stay, and then He was gone. Cair Paravel was restored, and we've been ruling alongside Caspian ever since. Not much has changed.

I just didn't mention my betrayal against Narnia and Aslan's sacrifice for me. I didn't want to scare her like that. I've found out the hard way that when you just openly talk to people about it. That's all they think of you. _  
_

"So tell me your story," I said finally, clapping my hands together and sitting up. Eleanor cocked her head. "Excuse me?"

"I just told you my life story, basically," I said. "Tell me yours."

She instantly shook her head and grabbed the books that had been abandoned for these past minutes. "Maybe another time, but not now."

"That's very daring for you to say," I noted, standing. "Didn't you just say it's only a bad memory?"

"Yes, but that's only as long as I try not to remember," she told me, and I nodded thoughtfully and decided not to speak of it any more. Maybe another time, like she said.

"You're so lucky," she said suddenly, taking a book from the pile I held and shelving it.

"How so?" I asked, cocking my head in wonder.

She looked to me. "You got to read all those books. Adventures…" she sighed, "And you got to live them, too. Doesn't it excite you that you created the stories?"

"I didn't really ask for it," I said blatantly and looking down. "But that's not how I looked at it. I didn't think back when I was doing it that I would make history_, _really. I had learned that wasn't what it was about, whatever I happened to be doing. There were these creatures and they had been oppressed. They all had these lives. They needed a voice."

I exhaled for a moment, and when Eleanor didn't answer I got nervous. I looked up her, and to my surprise, to see her smiling slightly at me.

"What?" I asked at her look. Her eyes smiled as she moved her gaze past me. "That was a very kingly thing to say."

"Hey, I am king," I joked. "Just because you've got the privilege of being on a first name basis doesn't mean you're allowed to forget that."

"Oh, _sor-ry_," she said before laughing. I could help but notice how her eyes crinkled slightly when she did that.

She stepped down from the ladder and released a happy sigh, moving to the table to get more books.

"Why'd you start laughing?" I questioned. She stood still for a moment, and then turned to me with the crinkly smile still present on her face.

"It's nothing actually, um-," she paused for a moment and ran her hand through her hair. "Remember when you gave me a book for when I finished history?"

"Yes, but did you ever actually read history?"

"I did. I just thought it would be interesting to hear from somebody who actually lived it," she replied as I grinned. "Anyway, do you have any other suggestions for me?"

"I'm sure I could find something-" I said, but trailed of when a figure appeared in the open doorway of the library.

"Council meeting, Ed," Peter called from the frame, crossing his arms as I met his firm gaze.

I looked back at Eleanor and began walking towards my brother. "Duty calls. Maybe next time."

"Now that I actually think about it, I'm sure I'll manage," she said jokingly, looking around the colossal-sized library where hundreds could be found to interest her. I smiled quickly as a farewell before turning to Peter and heading to that blasted meeting.

* * *

**Author's Note: I would just like to go ahead and thank those who have favorited my story: 19shohop and Hufflepuff Hex, those who have added my story to their alerts: 1WarriorQueen, 2featherbraids, Alicehime-sama, Daisybooks, Digimon hero ll, EternalDayDreams, LittleKid13, ShadowKaida, ShatterMyHeart710, melsol, prydain, seclue, and thejobester, and those who have reviewed my story: seclue AND ALL THE ANONS! I love you all, and I apologize to the anon Alex for forgetting Georgie Henley's birthday. It must have slipped my mind...**

**WOOOH! Now that I got all that ^^ off my chest I'd just like to apologize for not updating in a while. I'm sure you've heard an author apologize for this before (I certainly have)... but I just would like to tell you all that I will keep writing. I don't just do it for the reviews and the hits but I have been very busy. I thought summer wouldn't be this crazy but I guess I should have expected a few surprises! :p**

**Anyway... if you're reading this... please contribute by reviewing and telling me what you think! Good and bad! Nothing makes me happier on this site than seeing criticism being received well... I WANT TO IMPROVE SO I CAN MAKE A KICK-ASS STORY FOR YOU GUYS. Maybe not exactly kick-ass... but I think you get my drift... **


	9. The Adventure Initiator

Lucy

"Oh, come on, Eleanor! Please…"

I drifted off as I began pulling lightly on the arm of the older girl from where she sat in the library, a book stuck right before her nose as always. Eleanor was lovely, but dear Aslan she could be stubborn as well. I had only just suggested the idea of her coming to the practice grounds, but she had already beaten it down and insisted she stay where she was most comfortable.

"Lucy, I already told you. I'm not going to handle a sword. I will only make a fool out of myself and there's no use for me to even try."

"Of course there's good use in it!" I replied, stepping away from the chair. "Do you think I use a sword all the time? _No. _But it's still nice to learn. I'm afraid you're going to turn as pale as a ghost if you never go outside in the sun. You spend so much time in this stuffy room…"

"It's not stuffy," she contended with a small voice, though even this comment was impractical for her standpoint.

"Oh just come outside!" I shrieked. "It's lovely out. You spend too much time in books reading all these stories. Don't you want to experience actual adventures?"

She finally moved the book down slightly so her gaze now landed on me. Looking up to the ceiling and releasing a deep breath, she reluctantly complied. I grinned happily and then pulled her up from the chair, guiding her to the exit.

"Nobody better be watching," she warned as we approached the doors that led outside.

"Of course not," I answered earnestly. "Who would want to watch anyway?"

I laughed as she shoved me lightly, but I still earned a smile from her. Once we got outside, she squinted her eyes slightly and that erupted another laugh from within me.

"That is what happens when you constantly put yourself in the darkness-"

"Oh hush, Lucy," she interrupted irritably, though I could tell she wasn't actually serious. "I'm sorry I love reading and I don't enjoy making myself look like an idiot."

"That's the problem!" I revealed, and then swung my arm around her loosely as we headed to the armory. "Have a sense of adventure."

She rolled her eyes at me, but I stood my ground as we approached the equipment. The armory building was very large, but this made sense because it held everything the Narnian soldiers should need to practice and for battles. I picked up some light gear from the wall of fresh equipment and handed them to Eleanor.

"Put these on," I said. "Then we can get you a sword."

She took the equipment slowly from my hands and plopped herself down on a bench as she managed to get it on. "Should I change my shoes?" she asked. I nodded as the flats she was wearing seemed very unfit for dueling practice.

"There's some boots over there," I motioned to another room and watched her leave through the doorway. I approached a wall with swords, and decided to bring two wooden swords as well as two real ones, ones that Edmund would use with training recruits. The place I had in mind for practicing was pretty isolated to save Eleanor from any embarrassment she could possibly have so I didn't want to have to make the trek back to the armory until we were ready to retire for the day.

"Where are we going exactly?" Eleanor wondered as we jogged lightly down the path which declined on a hill.

"Just an isolated training field, for people like you who don't know how to handle a sword," I teased. She huffed in mock-annoyance but didn't say a word as we continued down the path.

Once we reached the training area, in a small grassy field with some coverage from trees, I put down the swords and lead her in a stretch. I extended my arms and crossed them over my torso and then rolled my neck while shaking out my legs. Eleanor followed, and then I walked over to the side of the drawn dirt circle and picked up the wooden swords.

"Here, we'll start with these," I tossed her a sword. "I'll teach you the basics first."

"I'd be happy just to master that, Lucy," she replied wistfully. I smiled and began instructing her on what to do.

After realizing Eleanor couldn't very well initiate the blocks, I decided to back track and go to the very basics of the basics; how to move, where to place your feet, and how exactly to know where to aim first. After about an hour or so, I began to understand that if all Eleanor had to do in a duel was block attacks until she came to the very edge of the world, she could do it. She had great reflexes, and was rarely caught off guard, but she would already be considered dead on the offensive end.

"See?" she said suddenly, right after blocking another attempted attack. "I wish I had also mentioned before that I can hardly do a push-up. Maybe you would have let out of this nonsense, then."

I laughed. "You're not bad on the defensive side, but honestly, Eleanor, I was more interested in getting you out of the library."

I relaxed my arm after one last swing and decided to give it a rest. She followed my motions but seemed very more pleased than me to be taking a break.

"We could try archery," I suggested hopefully, watching her take a sip of water. She nearly spat out the drink.

"Yeah, or we could go fold some laundry," she teased, earning a disapproving look from me.

"C'mon! It's not as physical demanding as this stuff," I said as I motioned to the equipment. We didn't even make it past wooden swords. "Just try it. It's a very different feel."

She rolled her neck slowly and exhaled. "Only for you, Lucy. Let's get this over with."

I gave her a sympathetic grin and then we returned to the armory to put back our gear. I was actually much more thankful than I showed because we didn't have to wear heavy gear while shooting an arrow.

At the archery fields it was a lot more crowed but Eleanor didn't say anything. I picked a spot in the middle where the crowds weren't as large as I began instructing her on how to hold the bow.

"Now exhale," I told her as I watched the arrow fall into place, aiming towards the target. "And release."

There was a whooshing sound that went past me before my eyes set themselves on the arrow, right inside the third border of the target.

"That was good!" I said gleefully. "Especially for your first shot."

Eleanor smiled slightly, obvious more pleased at her performance in this game. She shot a few more, all hitting around the same area, but it wasn't until the arrow hit a tree behind the target that she began to laugh.

"I think I've gotten worse!" she gasped as I laughed with her. "Maybe we should stop now."

"If you wish, I'm just glad you tried," I murmured, my head following a crowd of people who had jogging up to a training spot.

"Hold on, this should be good," I said happily, making sure Eleanor was behind me as I followed the crowd of people.

We approached the training area and managed to work our way through the crowd to see what was going on. Edmund and a trainee were at it, and everyone in the crowd was whooping and cheering with each blow between the two.

"So this is a real fight, right?" Eleanor had to yell so I could hear. I smiled but my eyes didn't leave the boys as they fought. A thought dawned over me as I watched Edmund attack that poor trainee who didn't stand a chance.

"Okay, so if you're not that good sports and physical stuff, I'm assuming…" I trailed off as I watched Eleanor scoff jokingly at my comment.

"Let me finish!" I shrieked. "If that is true, that must mean you are amazing at music and art and thinking, right?"

I watched as Eleanor's laugh died down. "Some people aren't that good at anything, Lucy."

"Are you one of those people?"

Her eyes met mine as she managed a small smile. "Here's what I see. Some people are born amazing at something. Others dedicate their lives to become amazing at something, and the rest, which just happens to be the majority unfortunately, half-ass a bunch of things so they aren't recognized for being stellar at anything at all."

I didn't look away from her stare as I thought about this. What an interesting way to think…

"Ugh! What is that smell?" I gasped, being reverted to the duel again. The crowd had died down some, I'm assuming because Edmund had been declared winner or had decided to give the trainee a break. I realized it was the trainer himself who reeked so horribly as he approached Eleanor and I.

Eleanor subtly looked moved her nose away from his direction and he laughed. "Sorry girls, this is what you get for trying to supply the best protection for Narnia."

"That's despicable," I muttered, refusing to look at him in all his sweaty glory.

"Hey, you came over to watch," he pointed out defensively. I shook my head at him and turned to look at Eleanor.

"We should probably leave before _it_ bleeds onto us," I teased him. He shot me a daring look as I grabbed Eleanor and walked in the other direction, but I avoided him to no avail as he started trotted right next to us.

"Lucy, what are we having for dinner tonight?" he asked innocently. I began walking faster.

"Edmund, if you don't stop before we get inside the whole castle will smell!" I warned sternly. He rolled his eyes before turning and walking away. I imagined him thinking of how proud Peter would be of him for that.

"Is it always that bad?" Eleanor piped up quietly once he was gone. I looked back to Edmund who had now already started fighting another trainee.

"Only when they are especially confident," I answered. She scrunched her nose in reply as I opened the door to the castle, a place that seemed to be beckoning her back inside the safety of its walls.

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**Author's Note: I had to update quickly to make up for the break! Review? :***


	10. Making Connections

Caspian

My day seemed to be going pretty well, but as I was walking down the hallway later in the morning I could feel a migraine coming. I blamed Peter first, but the most likely reason was probably all those meetings with the council…

And Evangeline.

"King Caspian! King Caspian!" she called very loudly to me as she came from the opposite end of the hallway, running.

"What's going on, Evangeline?" I asked as I got closer to her. She halted to a stop and her breath was ragged as she spoke.

"Have you seen Lady Eleanor anywhere? I'm afraid I've forgotten to tell her about the ball tonight…"

"You haven't seen her all day?" I said in disbelief.

"Not yet, but I'm just worried because all the guests will be arriving soon and she will be caught in the midst of oblivion," she replied between deep breaths.

"I'm sure you'll find her, Evangeline. I keep my eyes peeled," I consoled, and then we parted. Things like this happened more often than not with Eleanor, so it didn't even worry me that much anymore. Lots of times everyone seemed to forget where she spent her time the most.

"There you are," I drawled as I entered the library. Eleanor was perched on the ladder, a stack of books in her hand, and Edmund was reading in a chair closely nearby.

I released a small laugh as I approached the two. Edmund looked up from the story he was reading and shot me a confused look.

"Guilty as charged," I said, looking at him. "You know about the ball. She doesn't."

He scrunched his nose and rolled his head back as Eleanor looked between the two of us.

"What ball?"

"Evangeline's been looking for you. There's a ball tonight and she forgot to mention it," I explained as I turned to her. Eleanor's face turned to stone. "I have to go to a ball…"

"I'm afraid so," Edmund said dismally, standing up. Eleanor stepped from the ladder, evidently not particularly thrilled about going, either.

I clapped a hand on Edmund's back as we heading towards the door. "Oh c'mon on, all the ladies _love you_…"

"Oh, shut it," he interjected quickly. Eleanor smiled slightly before bidding us farewell.

"I better go," she said. "If Evangeline's looking for me she's probably having a fit. Thanks for letting me know," she looked between myself and the floor, and then turned her back to us as she left the library, "I'll see you later!"

We watched her go, and once she was gone, I turned to Edmund. "Friendly with Eleanor now, are we?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" he asked earnestly. It seemed he didn't get what I actually meant.

"Never mind," I brushed it off and he didn't say anything, so we walked in silence to the exit of the library. As we entered the hallway outside, both heading towards our bed chambers, I asked carefully, "So what's she like?"

"She's like any other girl, really," he simply replied. "But she likes reading, like, _a_ _lot."_

"That's a bad thing?" I wondered.

"No, not at all," he said hastily. "Though Lucy thinks it is. She thinks she spends too much time in books but not enough time outside. I don't mind, though."

"Huh."

"Yep," he said a bit awkwardly, and then looked at me quizzically. "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious," I replied. Edmund looked down and shook his head. "You're wondering if we made the right decision, aren't you?"

I shot him an empathetic look as we turned a corner. "Sorry, Ed, but I do have to know. Has she said anything out of the ordinary?"

"No," he said quickly, making me raise my eyebrows in skepticism.

"She's just any other girl from Earth, Caspian…"

"That's not true," I said, maybe a bit too harshly. "As far as we know, she's the only human who has been sent here since you and your siblings."

He looked away from my gaze, seemingly uncomfortable with what I was saying.

"I know you like her, and you're friends at all…" I continued, seeing his expression get more and more solemn. "I'm just saying, you have to remember there's a reason why she's here. If we are going to find out, I've got to understand what her motives are."

"Motives?" he repeated with doubt. His face glazed over in disbelief. "Whatever, Caspian. I'll see you later."

And with that, he turned a different corner than I to get to his chambers. I feared for him. If he got too close to her… I just couldn't picture any scenario where he didn't get hurt. Where is Aslan in all of this, anyway? I suddenly wondered about that as well. With summer beginning, and the girl being here for over a month, nothing had changed. She was still here, for reason that made itself disclosed, and He was not.

My thoughts rushed out of me as I collided with a figure that I hadn't seen as I was only feet from the entrance of my chambers. A flustered Susan looked up to me.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Susan. I didn't see you there…"

"It's fine," she managed a small smile, and I couldn't help but stare at her for a moment. I still thought of her as beautiful, but I didn't hold the kind of feelings I had for her all those years ago. It's like I had grown out of them, and I don't know if that was for better or worse.

"Well, I better go," she said and awkwardly stepped out of my path.

"Yeah, sure. I'll see you later," I turned to say to her, but she was already gone.

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**Author's Note: Thank you to aviyah for adding my story to their alerts! I hope you all liked this chapter! Review? **


	11. Trigger

Eleanor

When I finally managed to find Evangeline after Caspian had told me about the ball, up near the royals' bed chambers, I became surprised by the fact that he hadn't come running in flustered by how anxious she was. Maybe since he last saw her she had gotten worse, but it was pretty bad. When I approached her, I had to tell her to calm down, but I was quickly hushed as she swept me away to my chambers to get cleaned.

I was in the bathroom, rinsing my hair out in the shower, when Evangeline knocked on the door.

"Are you almost done, Eleanor?"

"I'll be out in a minute!" I called, and quickly shut the water off only a couple moments later. As I stepped out onto the glossy tile floors with wet feet, I grabbed the towel by the sink and wrapped it around my torso.

"Come outside when you're done," I heard Evangeline say. "I've got some dresses here you can pick from."

I wrapped another towel in my hair to avoid ruining the wooden floors of the bedroom and meekly stepped out to meet Evangeline. She didn't even seem that bothered by the fact that I was almost naked.

As if reading my thoughts she said, "I used to work in the infirmary a long time ago. I've seen worse. Believe me."

I managed a small laugh as she she moved to the side and presented each one of the dresses. Seeing them alone made me realize even more how different this life was than the one I had previously been living in.

"You never take that off, do you?" she said suddenly, with a small smile.

I gave her a quizzical look. "Take off what?"

"Your necklace, milady."

I instinctively looked down and that's when I remembered. It was something I rarely thought about, even in England. It was the only thing I had left from the fire. A silver key necklace, what an odd metaphor that could be.

"My parents gave it to me," I said, looking up to her while holding the necklace in between my fingers.

"It's lovely, really," she complimented. "Does it open something?"

I stared at her for a moment with my mouth agape, unsure of what to say, before I managed, "I gave the box to my sister before she got taken away to another family. We lived in an orphanage. I had told her I would never open it again, so she should have it."

"What was inside?" Evangeline asked curiously.

I swallowed, and a bittersweet taste began forming in my throat. To change the subject, I waltzed over closer to the bed and looked at the dresses.

"Where did you find these?" I questioned. She seemed to have let it go.

"Susan helped me get some. Remember when I had you fitted last week?"

"Oh right..." I had barely even made the connection between the two. I had been overtaken by their beauty. "They're all so big!"

"Well, this ball is a bit more formal than the rest," she explained, looking at me as I observed them all.

"How many balls do they have?" I asked.

"A handful each year. The seasonal balls always remain the same, but depending on what ages the monarchs are turning, more could be added. The end of spring ball is always very formal. Creatures from all over visit for it. That's the same with the Christmas Ball, in late December. The rest don't require this type of garb. Some of the others even could be considered festivals," she explained, running her hand along one of the dresses.

"They're all so beautiful. I don't know which to chose," I murmured, and then looked up to the dryad. "Could you pick, Evangeline?"

She smiled widely. "Sure."

The one she ended up picking was not the one I had in mind, but as I put in on behind a changing screen Evangeline told me it suited my fair complexion. The dress was very dark blue, sheer-sleeved, and had silver embroidery on the torso and along the ends of the dress which covered me all the way down to my feet. I walked out from behind the screen and watched as Evangeline smiled and brought a hand to her mouth.

"You look wonderful, miss," she said, approaching me and picked up one of the layers of her dress and examining it. "The new recruits will be all over you, I'm sure of it."

A blush rose up to my cheeks as I tried to ignore her comment, and went behind the screen to change out of the dress so she could do my hair and make-up.

"You're very talented at a lot of things," I said to her in the mirror of the vanity from where I sat, watching her braid my hair in the back and then twist it to one side and let its natural wave fall over one of my shoulders.

"I've got to be the best for the best," she smiled, taking a pin that was stuck between her teeth and sticking it my head. When she was finished, she spun me around and put on some light mascara and lipstick. When she turned me back around to look in the mirror, the girl who had lived in filthy London was gone. All that was left was a girl who had been born and raised by royalty. Evangeline looked pleased, but at that moment, _seeing _myself right there a completely different person, I couldn't tell whether it was apprehension or appreciation that finally got the bittersweet taste that had been in my throat to disappear. Even my necklace matched the beading of the dress.

"The monarchs will be so pleased," she smiled, proud of the creation she had made.

I turned and looked up to her. "Evangeline, will you be there tonight?"

She gave me a regretful look. "I'll be serving dinner."

"But you're a friend now," I said. "Surely you could dance if you wanted to."

She shook her head. "Doesn't matter. My job in Narnia must get done."

"I can see why they kept you," I murmured, turning back to my reflection in the mirror.

She smiled slightly, before her face turned to stone as she looked at me. "Oh, no..."

"What's wrong?" I asked worriedly, looking at her.

She gingerly leaned over and placed a hand around my ear. "You don't have your ears pierced."

She turned my head back to the mirror as I looked in horror, "No... I'm not doing that."

"Why not?" she said stubbornly, placing her hands at her hips.

"I don't like needles," I admitted, earning myself a 'whatever' look from her. "Why do I have to get them pierced anyway?"

"Queen Susan had the nicest pair you could borrow..." she drifted off, biting her lip.

"I really would prefer not to do that, Evangeline," I reminded her. After a minute or so of watching her pace, she calmed.

"I will give you this time," she warned. "But between now and the next ball it must be done. Promise?"

"Alright, I promise," I drawled, looking back into the mirror. My hand went up and traced lightly over my ear as I thought. "Does it really make that much of a difference?"

"Oh no, Eleanor, I'm sure it wasn't the earrings they'd all be looking at anyway," she joked, watching the blush come back to my face once again. She was lucky I held myself back from kicking her in the shins with these shoes. They did not add a terrible amount of height, but I'm sure they would hurt all the same.

"It's almost three o'clock," Evangeline noted from behind me, picking up some things around the room. "Can you manage to come down in one hour or shall I stay with you?"

"If duty calls, then go. I'm sure I'll manage," I said. She straightened up and smiled at me in the mirror, and then she was gone.

I stood up and walked across the room, the heels of the shoes making a clicking sound along the floor. My thoughts reverted back to Sophia, and now, that box. All it held were pictures, and music, and letters. Most of which would not be considered important, but nevertheless, they still were a part of me. Even in Narnia, how could I think of things such as those when in such a place as this?

_They weren't important_, I repeated to myself, pacing around the room, saying those three words in my head so many times that I began to wonder who had come up with the pronunciation for each.

I found myself feeling hot, so I stepped outside in the hallway and started walking. I didn't know exactly where I was going, but my body found itself craving fresh air so much that I just went with where my legs began taking me. After walking up a set of stairs and down another few hallways, I had found what I had been looking for.

From the entrance of a large wooden door with a small window on it to see the outside world, I found myself in a beautiful garden nearly the size of the armory. I discovered a great amount of different types of flowers as I wandered, the clicking of my heels much quieter on the open cobblestone pathways. In one corner, a swing hung from a large oak tree, and in other, a set of benches and a table. I continued walking, further and further, seeing how this garden looped itself around one side of the castle, before I was met at the end by a large stone wall. I turned on my heel and began walking back the other way, back to where I had come, taking deep breaths along the way.

I came back to the pathway that came right off the entrance and stood for a moment in the freshness of this garden and looked out at Narnia beyond the stone barriers, too beautiful for words to ever try describe.

"Susan, I'm glad you're ready now," a voice called from behind me. Instinctively, I turned, to meet the gaze of King Peter, now surprised to see I hadn't been the person he had been looking for.

"Eleanor?" he asked almost in disbelief. I nodded, but suddenly realized my fault.

"I'm sorry to intrude on this place if you didn't want me here, I just needed to some fresh air," I said hastily, and began heading towards the door. "I'll go now if you want..."

"No, it's fine," he said, placing a hand on my arm reassuringly. "I suppose it doesn't matter. It just caught me off guard that's all. You do like very nice, though."

"Thank you, King Peter, and I do apologize again. I should be going anyway, Evangeline said I should be going down soon," I gave him a quick smile before exiting, and then continued to berate myself as I walked downstairs for the ball. The first floor of the castle was much more crowded now, filled with lots of creatures in royal garb, all ready for the ball. I suddenly got nervous, realizing that with Evangeline working, and the monarchs getting their own special entrance, I was alone.

I slipped into the dining hall, now also a ballroom it seemed, with the long table for all the guests to eat on one side and an open dance floor on the other. Another thought plagued me. _Dancing. _

I walking further inside, away from the crowd which had accumulated at the door, and observed the thrones at the end of the room, perched on their own stage. Five. Five monarchs. A chair for each.

A little while later, as I made my way back over to the crowd in hopes to make it not blatantly obvious that I was the black sheep, a fanfare sounded and the clusters of people parted to made a pathway by the doors. One man stood up at a podium and began announcing special guests from both foreign lands and in Narnia. As he spoke, the creatures of the crowds still buzzed with chatter. It was only when the Kings and Queens of Narnia began being called, and that chatter died down, did I notice that the small orchestra of many different instruments and creatures had been playing.

_I present, Queen Lucy the Valiant of Narnia._

I watched my friend enter the hall, followed my a crowd of soft cheers, in a very elegant looking dress colored ivory. She was very composed with the presence of other Narnians, and even for her age it was easy to tell by her demeanor that she held the title of queen.

_I present, King Edmund the Just of Narnia._

Edmund walked in with the same regal air around him as his sister, dressed in what looked like very Narnian-styled clothed, colored blue. As I watched some of the ladies in the crowd, I realized Caspian was right about their drooling all over him, and I couldn't help but chuckle lightly to myself.

_I present, Queen Susan the Gentle of Narnia._

The cheers skyrocketed for as she entered, most of which came from new soldier recruits, and I was happy she handled the attention very well, smiling and waving but making no eye contact. Her dress was dark purple and shimmered as she moved down towards the end of the room.

_I present, High King Peter the Magnificent of Narnia._

Some girls swooned.

_I present, King Caspian X of Narnia._

And then some more.

Once everyone had entered, it was announced that the festivities would begin. For the first couple of dances, the monarchs stayed in their thrones, observing all their guests. I had stayed around the beverage table, wondering what to do with myself, when a middle-aged man and woman approached me with small talk. I had found out they were from Archenland, and I myself told them I was staying as a guest in the castle for a few weeks but after I had revealed that, they had walked away in a small fit of laughter. I remained still.

Dinner was announced after about an hour of breezy dancing, and I made my way over to the table, all of us "guests" waiting for King Peter to make a toast before we all sat and began eating.

"Are you Lady Eleanor, miss?" a dwarf in dark green next to me asked. I met his eyes and answered him after swallowing some type of delicious food which I didn't know the name of.

"I am," I replied. "May I ask who you are?"

"I'm Trumpkin, a friend of the kings and queens," he said. "I've heard a lot about you from them."

"And you the same," I said, giving him a small smile. He soon began talking about all the work he has been doing with the kings and queens since the beginning of King Caspian's reign in Narnia, which fascinated me more than I expected. He helped Edmund with the recruits, a soldier himself, and he held lots of interesting tales to tell about his experiences here. As I began talking with him more and more though, something became more clear to me, the concern in his eyes, and I couldn't help but feel like even the ones who hadn't met me felt the same way as did some of the monarchs.

After the meal, the dancing began again and this time I observed that pastime more, and less of the drooling girls who stood off to the side. King Peter and Queen Susan took part in dancing as well, laughing happily with their partners like they had been in that position a million times before. I could see Lucy from the opposite side of the room, chatting with Trumpkin and a faun who had never seen before. The dancing was quite simple, it seemed, most of which consisted of a waltz and easy ballroom. I wouldn't dare step out onto the dance floor, however. Every now and then I scanned the room for Evangeline but I'm sure she, as well as her anxiety, got lost within the crowds.

"You've remained near the beverage table the whole night yet you haven't had a single drink," a familiar voice said from beside me, making me jump out of my thoughts.

"I was just observing, Edmund," I said, not even looking at the youngest king. He chuckled, "So I'm sure you've noticed?"

"Noticed what?" I said, looking at him this time. I followed his gaze as his eyes narrowed on a flock of swooning girls. I gave him a sympathetic look.

"It could be worse," I noted.

"Yes, it could. I should remember that," he replied. I watched as he turned around and began pouring himself a glass of wine, and then looked between that and the one he help in his other hand.

"Two drinks, Ed? Really?" I asked in disbelief. He smirked at me before stretching out his arm to the beverage he had just poured.

"Not for me, for you."

I managed a smile as I reluctantly took the drink, keeping it firmly in the grip of my hand.

"You know what would make them really mad?" he wondered suddenly, setting his gaze on me.

"What, Edmund?" I inquired, mock-annoyance present in my tone.

"If they saw me dancing with you," he answered. It took me a moment to realize he was serious.

"Ha-ha," I said, to brush it off.

"I'm not joking!" he told me, and then looked back at the flock again, which had already spotted us. "They would get so mad. Me dancing with a beautiful girl like yourself..."

"Beautiful?" I repeated, locking eyes with him. Edmund smiled.

"Beautiful. You're one of my closest friends, which is weird to say because I have barely known you a month, and you look lovely tonight. What other definition of the word is there?"

I looked down at my feet. "I don't know, Edmund. But in conclusion, I'm not dancing."

"Oh, why not?" he whined.

"You know I'm beginning to wonder what all that alcohol intake is doing to that tiny little brain you got up there," I joked, tapping his head lightly. He shook his head but with a smile on his face. "Absolutely nothing. Please just give me a reason why."

"Please just give me a reason why, what?" somebody repeated from in front of us. I was so happy to see it was only Susan, leaving the dance floor with pink cheeks and a smile on her face.

"Why Eleanor refuses to dance with me," he explained. I shot him an exasperated look.

"Don't make it sound personal like that. I wouldn't dance with anyone," I said.

"Why not?" Susan and Edmund asked at the same time, causing them to grin at each other. I tried to stand my ground in between the two of them by keeping a straight face.

"No, but seriously Eleanor, it's a lot of fun," Susan said with a face full of mirth. I shrugged, watching her set her drink on the table behind us. "Please just say why, and then I'll leave you alone."

A memory flashed before my eyes, one I haven't seen in a long time, of my family. Singing and dancing. Playing music...

"I just don't want to make a fool out of myself," I lied. "I don't really know how these things work."

Susan gave me a thoughtful nod as I explained, and then was taken back in by the crowd and left, just as promised.

I hated lying, but right now didn't seem like the time to give her my complete life story, especially with her being swept away to the dance floor every five minutes.

"I see that look," Edmund said beside me. "You're hiding something, I know it."

"Am not," I said defensively.

"Alright, fine then," he took one final sip of his wine and then grabbed my untouched glass and set them on the table. "If I lead, you'll be fine. Dance with me."

"Ed, I'm not doing that. I already told you," I replied sternly. "I thought I would be left alone about this."

"That was from Susan, not me," he edged on. I realized it was only a matter of time before I gave in. "Come on, El, please?"

"Since when do you call me _El_?" I asked, more interested in getting away from dancing. He looked intently, which hinted to me he had saw through it.

"Since when do you call me _Ed_?"

I met his gaze on me and instantly regretted the decision I made to take his hand and allow him to lead me to the dance floor. The music was slightly upbeat, and as we got a spot on the dance floor he lifted my arm and I instinctively spun around.

As I turned back to him, I noticed his head was cocked to the side. "How did you know to do that?"

"Lucky guess?" I tried. He let it go.

"Alright, well, just follow my lead. This one's pretty easy," he pulled me closer to him and put his one arm at my waist. I put my arm on his shoulder, and our others hands intertwined as he lead me into the dance.

He was right about how easy this dance was as we began making our way around the floor, myself following the steps. Some memories flashed by, but the song was soon over so they left quickly. The next song was slower, so we stayed in a much smaller area than what the dance before had us cover.

"If anyone's asks you how you got so well, tell them you learned from me," he joked. I rolled my eyes. "Go back to your gaggle."

His mouth opened slightly as he grinned at what I had said and then exhaled. "You know, I could step all over your toes."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Why do you say that so seriously?"

"Because I'm not kidding. It wouldn't do you any good with the shoes I'm wearing," I explained, making him smile.

I watched his eyes meet mine. "I was serious about what I said before, though. You're a really good dancer. But you're too tense."

"Sorry," I muttered quietly.

"It's not your fault," he said. "You're just nervous."

"I am not nervous..."

"Oh yeah, sure," he said in disbelief, trying to make a joke of it all. I rolled my eyes again. "Just be quiet, Edmund."

"I can do that," he said melodramatically. I ignored this.

As we continued to sway to the music, I realized he had both his arms around my waist now, and mine around his neck. I'm sure that seemed more fitting for the tempo of the music, it just worried me that I didn't realize when that happened. Why on Earth was I dancing now, with Edmund, of all people? I'm sure I was most comfortable with him, but why did he give a damn anyway...

"Are you having a silent fit with yourself, or something?" he asked quietly, causing me to bring my gaze up to him.

"I though I told you to be quiet," I said, flexing my thumbs which rested on his neck. He looked up and around the room, other couples still dancing, and leaned in closer to me.

"The gaggle is gone," he whispered in my ear. "We don't have to pretend like we actually like each other anymore."

"You're such a child," I whispered back. As the music ended, his slid his arms off me and I did the same.

"I'll see you at my funeral," he smiled, backing away from me and the dance floor until I couldn't see him any longer. I didn't even bother rolling my eyes this time as I made my way outside for some fresh air.

It was dark out, with the exception of the numerous amount of stars, colored across the sky like paint on a canvas. Seeing them all, I couldn't help but feel so tiny. I often thought about this when I looked up in the sky. It was just something that triggered in my mind when I saw them. There are million other things out there, and yet the world seems so much smaller than it actually is. My family is out there somewhere, thought I don't know where exactly, but it scares me to think of the infinity that is right in front of my eyes. Where does it end? Where does it go? How could one possibly begin to think they know a decent amount of information about the world when is just keeps going on? How could I ever have the hope to believe I'd see my family again if there are so many unknown places out there?

* * *

**Author's Note: WOOOOAHH! Nice long chapter, I'm surprised I did this all in one day. I've actually been looking forward to writing in Eleanor's POV for a while... I've missed her! Special thanks to SiriuslyAmazayn and MsIndependentGirl for following and favoriting my story! :* And also to Anna the Viking XD for following. I love youuuu.**

**Review? Favorite? Follow? Nothing? You decide!**


	12. Working Under Conditions

Edmund

Peter and Susan had been at it again, keeping secrets, and no matter how hard I tried to ignore it, I couldn't. I felt like I was so small behind the both of them, and I was hurt by the fact that they didn't think they could trust me with whatever they felt the need to hide. Could it really be that bad?

After I entered Susan's study, the two of them concluded their conversation in a hushed whisper before turning to meet my confused gaze.

"What's going on?" I said hesitantly, though I expected it was still the same old secret.

"Nothing," they both said at the same time. I rolled my eyes.

"Bull. Tell me the truth."

Susan looked to Peter with an unsure look on her face. "Ed, I don't know if that's the best idea…"

"Why not?" I interpolated, glaring at the two of them. "Did you forget we are in whatever mess it is you two are talking about together?"

"That's not true," Peter tried to argue.

"Yes it is. Am not part of this monarchy anymore?" I asked him, though he knew the answer to that.

Susan sighed and stood up. "Ed, it's different now."

"What do you think I'm going to do? Tell everyone in the castle? No. I just feel like you two don't take me seriously because of everything that has been going on," I replied exasperatedly. Peter pinched the bridge of his nose as Susan sat back down.

"Aslan came to me a little bit before Eleanor came…"

"Peter!" Susan exclaimed as her eyes widened.

"Sue, there's no point in keeping it a secret from him now," he explained, looking between the two of us. "Aslan came to me a little bit before Eleanor got here. He told me something had changed, and whatever it was, that was the reason for us staying with Caspian in the first place."

"After we defeated Miraz?"

"Yes," Peter gave Susan a wary look. "We don't know exactly what that means, and we've been trying to figure that out. We think it has to do something with Eleanor. We don't know why she came, and we don't know why we stayed either. They're both connected, somehow, it seems."

I exhaled and ran a hand through my hair, taking in all that he had said. How could Eleanor have anything to do with this? She was just any other girl, I mean, her parents had died and all, but tragedies like that occur all the time, everywhere…

"If she's involved in some way, I doubt she knows anything about it," I told them. Susan shifted her head back and forth slightly while shrugging as if contemplating the idea.

"That's possible. But how could you be so sure?"

I said, "I just know. She's a terrible liar. Lucy agrees as well. And she and Lucy are best friends now," Peter's eyes went to the floor. "If she had noticed anything, Lucy would have told you, right?"

"Right," Peter said sternly. "But that still doesn't explain why she's here."

I didn't argue with him on that, but didn't stop wondering. I suppose it hadn't been in my mind since she got here, Eleanor, because I stopped questioning why she was here a long time ago. It was not even something I felt the need to think about. She seemed to be at home here in my eyes, subtracting that minor detail.

"Alright, well, thank you for telling me," I said after a minute. "I'll see you later, I guess."

* * *

"Eleanor, I was thinking," Susan said in between forkfuls of food as we all sat in the dining hall for lunch, "If you really wanted to learn how to dance for the next ball, we could set you up with lessons so you don't have to stand around the whole time."

I released a short laugh. "Eleanor's the last person here who needs dancing lessons, Sue. She's more than exceptional."

Lucy smiled, but remained quiet as Susan spoke, looking directly at the girl who was now the topic of conversation. "Is that so, that's too bad. I didn't get a chance to see."

"You were too busy dancing with everybody else," Peter joked, getting a whack on the arm by my older sister. I didn't blame Susan for trying to help; especially now since it seemed Eleanor's slate was clean. It was almost as if she was trying to redeem herself from their first encounter by showing she cared, even if we didn't know why she was here and what Aslan wanted us to do. In a diplomatic sense, it's never a good idea to go out of your way to make enemies.

"That's very nice, Queen Susan," Eleanor said after a long pause. "But even if I was terrible I don't think that would be a good idea…"

"So you know you're good?" Lucy interjected, a playful smile tugging at her lips. Eleanor shot her a confused look, but something more was on Lucy's mind. After nobody said anything for a decent amount of time, Lucy added, "Well you are."

She stabbed her fork gently in the food, shooting an innocent smile towards Eleanor's way. What was on her mind?

"Well, I'd love to stay and chat," Susan said, standing up. "But duty calls. I will see you later."

Only a few minutes after Susan had bid us farewell, everyone had trickled out of the dining hall. I sighed inwardly to myself as I walked out alone, wondering what they day would bring. As per usual, I found myself at the library with Eleanor, keeping up the normal routine of holding books while she shelved them. It seemed our time to shelving books was coming to a close, due to her hard work; there was only one wall left.

"You're very quiet today, is everything alright?" I asked, handing another book to her.

"Everything's fine," she answered, avoiding eye contact. Even though I could tell she wasn't speaking the truth, I kept my mouth shut. It didn't feel right pestering her like that. I just stuck to the normal routine. We continued to shelf, book after book, a silence holding both comfort and tension inside it, like neither of us knew if it was right to speak or not.

"Now you're quiet, Ed," she noted softly, looking at me. I smiled. "Right, we have nicknames now."

"You started it," she said, stepping down the ladder. I followed her back to the table.

"El," I breathed, causing her to turn. "El, El, El…"

"What is it?" she said, partially smiling. I looked at her.

"Oh, nothing," I replied. "I'm just deciding if that name really suits you."

She laughed. "What suits me, then?"

I leaned against one of the many plush chairs found in the library, watching her smile. "Ellie?" I tried.

"Too babyish."

My eyes looked thoughtfully towards the door. "Nora?"

She scrunched her nose. "Where did you get that?"

"Elea_nor...Nor_a…"

She nodded and sat down in the chair I leaned on, a stack of history books at her lap, cupping her chin in her hands.

"Well, that's all I got," I confessed, looking down at her.

"El is fine," she decided, looking at the empty shelves with a distant look in her eye. I began to wonder what was actually bothering her again, so I sat down on the chair beside hers and began staring intently at the wall as well, partially hoping she would see me and get a laugh out of it.

"What are you doing, Edmund?" she asked curiously, seeing my eyes narrow at the blank space.

"I don't respond to that name," I said monotonously, not averting my gaze. I heard her chuckle softly.

"_Ed, _what are you doing?" she said irritably, though when I looked at her I could see her mouth was upturned into a smile.

"Who, me?" I said, acting shocked and bringing a hand to my chest. She laughed and looked down. "Yeah, you, you big idiot," she shoved my arm playfully.

"I was trying to think like you," I said truthfully. "You were staring intently at the incredibly boring, beige-colored, empty shelved wall, so that's what I did."

She looked between the two. "And your conclusion is?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Well," I clapped my hands together and leaned over my knees. "That wall is incredibly boring, so you must be thinking incredibly boring thoughts."

She glared at me in mock-annoyance. "So that means you are equally boring then, since you looked at it as well."

"I suppose you are correct."

Eleanor straightened up and looked down at the book on top of the stack she was holding. "Just like you are now looking at this picture of a faun and a goose. Not only do you think incredibly boring thoughts, but you're also a goose."

She showed me a book with a picture just of that on the front. "But what if I want to be the faun?"

"You got drawn the short straw, sorry," she said, shrugging and then pretending to give a sympathetic smile as she stood up.

I followed suit but marched over to the shelf and pulled out a book I had seen earlier in the day. She shot me a confused look but I continued to speak as I held its' cover up in the air. "Now you're looking at a picture of a cricket, so you must be one of those."

"Goose," she said playfully.

"Cricket," I snapped back at her. She smiled and looked down, tucking a piece of hair in her face behind her ear. "Now we have our nicknames."

Her eyes widened. "Everyone would think we went mad."

"Everyone doesn't have to know, Cricket," I retorted.

"Oh, how did I get stuck with you?" she wondered, mostly to herself as she stepped closer.

"Sorry about that," I drawled, stepping closer to her, putting my hands on either side of her face. "It wasn't in the terms and conditions."

Her eyes twinkled as she grinned, and then her hand shot up from her side to cover the one I had on her face. She didn't let go, even as the smile ran away from her face. It was like all at once she was sad again because she wasn't distracted from her thoughts anymore. Sometimes I would blink and see the change, and the world would turn gray, and suddenly her upturned smile had left her.

"Cricket," I exhaled. "What's wrong?"

Her breathing became more ragged as her eyes widened, those big brown eyes, and she didn't have a clue. I could tell. Something was wrong, with what she was feeling, and she couldn't find the words or thoughts for it. Finally, she said, "I don't know."

My hands brushed the hair on the side of her face away as I moved them back, and then down to my sides. She looked at me intently, and then I watched as her eyes glazed over into a totally different feeling, replacing whatever she had been feeling before.

Suddenly, a burst of energy electrified through me and I went and wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her into a hug. She wrapped hers around my neck, resting her head on my shoulder, and I could feel her breath hot on my neck as I held her, silent. She didn't say anything, and I don't know if she wanted to, but it seemed clear that she needed somebody to hold her, all this time of not knowing how to feel or think or see had caught up to her, and I'm sure even though that wasn't exactly what she was feeling, I was close. It reeked from the sign of darkness in her eyes.

Her hands flexed on my neck, and I lifted my head to meet her eyes, which I was surprised to find were closed. I watched her thoughtfully, unsure if she actually was asleep until those brown orbs opened up. She managed a smile towards me as she backed away.

"What do you want to do now?" I asked, assuming she'd want to take a break from shelving books.

She ran a nervous hand through her hair. "Could you tell me another story, Goose?" she said sheepishly. I smiled, and led her over to the couch were we sat and I began with _Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. _As I told her the story, she leaned her head on my shoulder and played with my hand thoughtfully, running her fingers up and down the sides and turning it over as if she was actually fascinated by it.

A little while later, she had managed to fall asleep, and I couldn't help but observe her as she was at peace. My eyes went over every curve of her body, her jawline, her sides, all the way down to her feet as a burning sensation began forming itself in my stomach. I tried to ignore it as I continued telling the story, even if she wasn't completely conscious. I suddenly felt the urge to kiss her, like full on kiss her, on the lips. Why would I think something like that? Was she even thinking the same things as we were together? She probably wouldn't even remember most of this tomorrow, and I tried to remind myself of that but my attempt was to no avail. After a few minutes, she exhaled deeply and wrapped an arm around my torso, her eyes still closed. I reached over and brushed a strand of hair from her forehead, my hand instinctively going to trace the frame of her face lightly. Once I realized what I was doing, I pulled away quickly, and decided to look at anything but her as we sat there together. Whatever had been bothering her had been gone, as she probably wandered into a deeper sleep. I could tell by the way her face softened under my touch that she had found bliss.

I found myself drifting in and out of sleep as well, finally allowing my conscious to float away after a few minutes.

"Ed, what are you doing?"

That didn't last long.

"What, Lucy?" I yawned, rubbing my eyes and looking at my sister who stood above me. Her eyes looked pointedly at Eleanor right next to me, now lying out with her feet on my lap.

"We fell asleep," I said simply. She gave me a skeptical look, but didn't say anything as she sat in a chair across from us.

"How exactly did that happen?" she questioned, now a playfulness lacing her voice. I rolled my eyes.

"I was just telling her about another book she missed out on, and then I looked over and she was asleep. I didn't want to move and risk waking her so I fell asleep as well."

"How romantic."

"It is not romantic," I replied defensively. This time Lucy was the one to roll her eyes as she looked at Eleanor again, who rolled onto her back.

"What was going on with you at lunch, by the way?" I asked, genuinely curious as to why she had been acting so pointedly towards Eleanor.

She shrugged and looked out the window. "Honestly, I was just hoping she would tell us something about herself."

"You're not the only one," I muttered, looking numbly towards her.

"Peter told you," she stared blankly. I nodded. "Figures. I only did it because they were driving me crazy. I feel bad, but they make me want to scratch out my eyes sometimes."

My eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. "Who?"

"Peter, Susan, and Caspian," she said. "I mean, don't they understand that she's just a girl? Just like us? When we came into Narnia, we didn't have any idea what was going on. How do they expect this to be any different? If we keep treating her like a fugitive, then how will she adjust?"

I replied, "They just told me today. What do you think about the whole thing with Aslan coming to Peter and telling him all that stuff?"

"I don't think we should live off of it," she replied blatantly. That surprised me, because Lucy was the most faithful of us all.

"I can see what you're thinking. I just mean that if Aslan told Peter all this, it seems there's nothing we can to do change it. Let's just play the story out," she said in a consoling tone, though it didn't make me feel much better about anything else.

I nodded in agreement, turning my head to see Eleanor stir beside me. She swung her feet over the side of the couch and sat up, finally meeting the eyes of Lucy and myself.

She rubbed her eyes. "Hey, guys. Sorry about that."

Lucy smiled. "It's fine. I just walking in here and saw you and Ed getting all cozy so I figured I'd sit down and chat."

"You could have woken me up," she said slowly, ignoring her comment, and then looked at me. "Especially if you had to go do something."

"As far as I know, our schedule is cleared for the day, but that could change anytime," Lucy said, as Eleanor sat back into the couch and rolled her neck. "Stiff?" Edmund said with a chuckle.

"Yeah," she breathed, finally sitting back in the couch. "What were you guys talking about?"

She looked between the Lucy and me and noticed the sudden silence that had come over us all.

She managed a smile and sat up. "That bad, huh? That's a dangerous game. I could have just heard every word you said."

"But I know you didn't," my sister said, smiling back. Eleanor reluctantly nodded.

I noticed a look on Lucy's face, like she was about to say something she knew I wouldn't like, but before I managed to stop her she blurted out, "Eleanor, how did you get so good at dancing?"

Instead of turning away shy, like what I expected, a grim look planted itself on her face. "That's what you were talking about?"

We both nodded carefully, watching her gaze set on something right past Lucy's form. "I don't know what you want me to say. I don't remember much."

"Just tell us what you do," Lucy said, looking lightly on her.

Eleanor exhaled and turned her head between the two of us. "My father worked at the local newspaper from where we lived when I was younger, some town on the coast of England. My mother stayed at home with us, my sister and my brother and me, but she enjoyed singing and dancing. We were just very musical. I don't really remember anything else, though," she sighed, raking her hands through her hair.

"Are you alright?" I asked, concerned, watching her put her head in her hands. She looked up to me and managed a smile. "I just don't understand why. I can't remember anything on my own, that's why the memories of dancing only came to me at the last ball. It's like my mind automatically blocks them out, and I don't have any way of remembering."

"You have your necklace," Lucy pointed out. Eleanor shook her head.

"Yeah, it's not much use, though. It used to open a box I had a long time ago, but I gave it to my sister, unlocked, and now I don't have anything."

"Do you want to remember?" I inquired.

She sighed. "I don't know about that either. It's like a double edged-sword. I do, for their memory. But I don't because I don't want there to be all the pain and I don't know how I could not notice it."

"We could start with something simple," Lucy suggested, causing Eleanor to look up to her. We watched, waiting for an answer, and after a moment, she sat back into the couch and nodded.

"What was your mother's name?" Lucy began.

"Margo. Her real name was Margaret. But my dad called her Margo."

"Dad's name?"

"James Senior. My older brother was James Junior."

"Your sister?"

"Sophia."

Lucy smiled. "That wasn't so bad."

"That was easy," Eleanor replied dismally, looking up at the ceiling.

"You say your family was musical. Elaborate," I suggested, leaning in closer to her.

She stayed still as she answered, looking up at the ceiling at nothing in particular. "We all played instruments. My mother and I played piano. James and my father played guitar, and Sophia could play trumpet and violin," a small smile sneaked itself on her face. "My mother and I used to sing together, now I remember. That was one of the pictures we used to have. My father would always take pictures of us with the extra camera rolls he had from the newspaper. There is one of my mother and me at the piano, from behind. I was maybe six, and she had already taught me everything she knew."

Lucy grinned. "That's nice."

Eleanor looked at her, eyes glassing over. "It was."

After a moment of silence, she suggested an idea herself. "Enough about me. Tell me more about yourselves."

"There's not much to tell," I noted. "I think we already told you everything, really."

"Tell me about the first time you came to Narnia," she said, eying me. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, but luckily Lucy decided to take this one.

"The first time we came to Narnia, we met these two beavers who helped us on our journey to meet the White Witch. We didn't know animals could speak, and as we approached them, Peter made this clicking noise, and Beaver told him off."

"What did he say?" she asked curiously.

"I ain't gonna smell it, if that's what you want," I answered in a very animalistic type of voice. Eleanor and Lucy erupted in laughter, causing me to smile at the two girls.

"That was great, now thinking about it," Lucy said in between fits of laughter, wiping a tear from her eye. "He hated to be told off by anyone, let alone a beaver."

Exhaling happily, Eleanor calmed herself down.

"Oh shoot…"

Lucy and I both looked to her, who had her eyes on a clock nearby.

"What's wrong?" I asked. "Late for something?"

"Yeah," she answered, a bit dazed as she stood up. "I told Evangeline I would be up twenty minutes ago. I'll see you later, Goose!"

And with that, she was gone.

"Goose?" Lucy asked, with a sly grin on her face.

I shook my head. "Don't ask."

She turned away from me with that sly grin still on her face, and so I decided to turn the conversation around by asking sardonically, "Should we go run to Peter and tell him everything she just said?"

She rolled her eyes, looking back to the doors Eleanor had just left in and breathed out one word as we both looked at each with small smiles on our faces, "No."

* * *

**Author's Note: And there you have it! Chapter 12! I hope you enjoyed! Thank you to The Cupcake Superhero for following and favoriting, MsIndependentGirl for reviewing, and Yellowdog262 for following! I will try to update as soon as possible, but it will come faster if you review, so review? :D**


	13. The Obliterated Marriage Proposal

Peter 

The letter from Archenland proposing a marriage between Prince Solomon and Susan had been at the very back of my mind until many weeks after Eleanor's entrance into Narnia when I found it on the top of a pile of documents on my desk. As I reread it, thinking of what I would actually say when I replied, I noticed at the very bottom an invitation for Susan, as well as two others, to journey to Archenland next week and stay until the end of summer. With all the thoughts racing through my mind, I hastily wrote a letter in reply due to the fact that they had probably expected an answer a couple weeks ago. I had Evangeline send it away with the rest of the post, and hurriedly searched the castle for Susan to tell her she had agreed to consider the offer.

"Peter, what if don't want to marry?" she nearly screeched at me, sitting on the couch of her extravagant suite as I stood nearby, observing a vase of roses as I spoke.

"Sue, nothing bad could come of it, and besides, there's not much going on here, anyway," I assured.

"I know, but…" she trailed off, and then started at me with something very regretful in her eyes. "It's Caspian. I know we had hit it off, but it doesn't seem like he cares anymore."

"You'll never know how you feel unless you take a step back. You've seen each other nearly every day for the past five years. Maybe you just need a break," I suggested, watching her stand and cross her arms.

"I suppose so," said sighed, and then looked down. "Who should come with me?"

"I'd prefer at least Edmund or Caspian," I told her.

"Then Edmund. I highly doubt Caspian would to take a trip just to see if courting Prince Solomon would work out or not," she replied despondently. "Who else?"

"Doesn't matter. If you don't care then Ed can decide," I said. "It will bring you to the end of the summer, a little over a month."

"I'm sure he'll want to bring Eleanor," she told me, almost smirking. "It's either her or Lucy, if you think about it."

I did. "I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Why not?"

I exhaled heavily. "I don't know… complication? How would they explain her place when they got to Archenland? And how she came in contact with a king if she has no history here whatsoever? I think it's just better we keep her here," I said finally, meeting my sister's gaze. She shook her head at my idea.

"Maybe she should go. Get some air. She doesn't affect us any more here than she will there."

I considered the idea as another thought popped into my head. "It would give them a chance to get closer. Maybe she would finally say something about who she is."

Susan rolled her eyes. "If that's how you want to think of it, Pete, then go ahead."

"Well, what's your reason?" I questioned irritably, leaning back on the small, glass top side table.

"Get some air," she repeated. "Genuinely for her sake. She spends all her time in that library. I think she needs to see what it's actually like living here."

"Isn't living in a castle good enough, Sue?"

"It's more her state of mind I'm worried about," she admitted, setting her eyes far away from me. "Think about it. She has no one. We had each other. We don't know what happened to her, but Ed said her parents and brother are dead, Pete," she sighed. "What bad could her leaving do?"

"Keep your enemies close," I said sternly.

"She's not an enemy! If you haven't noticed, she and Lucy are thick as thieves nowadays."

I did notice.

"So what is the High King going to do now?" she pestered on mockingly, taking a step towards me, after I held the pause. I looked at her and narrowed my eyes, wondering why she was constantly battling me. Does it really make a difference if she goes or not? No. The only thing that made me snap was knowing deep down Eleanor actually meant something to Edmund and Lucy. I couldn't damage any more of what they had with what they've already been through.

"Fine," I responded, leaning forward so I spoke eye to eye with her. "But don't come running to me if something bad happens and it has to do with her."

"Nothing's going to happen," she said, her voice not much louder than a whisper.

"Of course that's what you say now," I countered, turning around and walking towards the door. "I'll tell everyone else the news."

"Don't give yourself a nose bleed," she commented dryly as I left. It took me all my will to not turn around and try to snatch the last word from her as I walked out the door.

Edmund and Lucy were fine with the plan, though I could tell Lucy was a bit upset she wouldn't see her friend for the rest of the summer. They went to go find Eleanor to tell her the news.

Now I had to tell Caspian.

It boggled my mind when I tried to understand how the two of them had felt all those years ago. They cared so much when we were defeating Miraz, but once he was gone, so was whatever they had. It was just for that reason that they seemed to keeping trying to make it work, but what I didn't understand about the whole affair was that even after all these years, neither one of them have snapped. Even if Caspian didn't approve of Susan going to see Solomon, he had no say over the matter, but telling him now was better the alternative; not telling him and having to deal with his moody demeanor later.

"Yes, she can go," Caspian answered, very nonchalantly, which surprised me. I found him in his study, secluded from everyone else, reading one of his professor's old books.

"Alright, then," I said happily. "I didn't know you'd be so fine with it, but I'm not going to complain."

Caspian shook his head and put down the book he had been reading. "What am I to do, Peter? It would have been different if you hadn't stayed, or if she actually showed interest in me when you did, but she didn't. If it works out with Prince Solomon, then great. That would only strengthen the alliance between Archenland and Narnia. And, who I am to keep her from going? Nothing would happen if she stayed, anyway."

By the time he had spoken the last bit, his voice changed, almost as if it was more sadness than rage that had overcome him. I nodded my head at his testimonial, and he stuck his nose back into his book, so I decided to leave. I never would have liked him and Sue together, but better him than a stranger from another country. I already managed to tolerate Caspian, most of the time, and even though we argued on many things it showed me he was passionate about what he was doing. He wouldn't let anyone take Narnia away from him after we're gone. If we ever go.

The week seemed to go by incredibly fast as everyone was preparing for the departure. Archenland had sent back a letter, explaining suites for Susan, Edmund, and Eleanor had already been set up. They will come just in time for the mid-summer's ball, so there should be a lot of ways that Solomon and Susan can get to know each other while still keeping Ed and Eleanor occupied.

The morning of their departure came, and I found myself standing outside Cair Paravel, watching the carriages pull up to take them away to Archenland. Lucy, Caspian, and Evangeline had come to say goodbye, as well. I approached Edmund first.

"Watch out for Eleanor, Ed," I said sternly. He nodded at me, and then I shook his hand firmly before he went off the say goodbye to the others.

"I'm going to miss you," I heard Lucy say close by, and I watched as she pulled Eleanor into a hug and the other girl smiled. Evangeline came up behind them and did the same. "Have fun. Write to us."

"I will," Eleanor smiled back, and then walked away from them while waving. Her eyes turned as she saw me staring at her, so she walked over to me, a bit apprehensive.

"Thank you for letting me go, King Peter," she said softly. "I'm sure the time will fly and I will be back here again in a blink."

"No problem. Try not to get into any trouble," I said, trying to joke but also showing her I meant what I said. She nodded curtly at me, before turning to Caspian and doing the same. After a moment, Edmund came up from behind her and tapped her arm lightly. "Time to go, El."

She gave everyone one last smile before following him into one of the large, black carriages that had two horses shackled to it.

As Susan stepped out from the door frame of the Cair, Caspian stiffened slightly. Her goodbye was much like Eleanor's, except when she got to me she pulled me into a hug.

"Write," I told her. "If anything happens."

She let me go. "I will. Remember, don't give yourself a nose bleed."

I managed a small smile as she turned to Caspian, giving him a subtle nod, and then disappearing into a different carriage. Caspian began walking backwards into the castle, staring at the carriages raptly, and then he was gone as well.

With only Lucy and Evangeline by my side now, I suddenly felt a lot more alone, but it felt right. Caspian and Susan needed this break from each other, and to be honest, I needed a break from them as well. It was only a distraction, and while much hadn't been going on since we rebuilt Cair Paravel, it didn't make things any easier.

Inside one carriage as it waited in standstill to be taken away, Susan opened up a small book and began reading. In the other, Eleanor was waving to Lucy and Evangeline. After a minute or so, the carriages began moving, and Eleanor turned to Edmund as he said something that made her erupt in laughter. I had never seen her like that, so happy, and I began to wonder what would happen to all of this when we were gone, and what would happen to her. Lucy turned to me with a sad smile on her face, a poignant reminder how much Eleanor meant to her nowadays. We watched together as the carriages went away, and I looped an assuring arm around my sister's torso as they became faded dots in the horizon, the only sign of them ever being here being the dust that had erupted from the earth and now hung loosely in the air like stars in the sky.

* * *

**Author's Note: Thank you for the lovely reviews from SweetSunnyRose and the anon LittleKid13! Also a thank you goes to SweetSunnyRose, eastern-tennis1621, and fangirlofeverything for following my story! I hope everyone else who is reading is liking it, review? (^o^)**


	14. There Goes the Walls

Eleanor

_"Ellie, Ellie, Ellie!" my mother yelled up the spiral wooden staircase to me. "You don't want to be late for your first day of school!"_

_"Jesus, mom. I'm coming!" I said irritably, making my descent down the creaking staircase to my mother. She looked me over with eyes full of mirth and then brought me to the living room where James and Sophia had already been rounded up. My father stood by the small wireless that was playing music softly as he got ready to take a picture with his gaudy equipment. I stood beside Sophia, now seven years old, as my father got ready to click the button to initiate the flash, and then we'd be on our way. _

_"Mummy, can we go yet?" Sophia whined next to me. My mother rolled her eyes as she approached my sister and straightened out the end of her pleated skirt._

_"Just one picture for Daddy, he hasn't got much film left," my mother said. Sophia released a big sigh as my mother backed away from her._

_"At least it's not often we have to do this," James muttered to me._

_"Imagine one hundred years from now. There will probably be cameras the size of our fingernails," I replied. James shot me a look of mock-horror, causing me to erupt in laughter. The button clicked, the flash went off, and I stopped laughing. _

_Then we were on our way._

_"Oh, you're going to have such fun," my mother cooed as we stepped through the front door, but as I looked back, I saw a deep look of sadness flash into her eyes as she watched us go. _

_"C'mon, El!" my sister said happily, getting onto her bike. James was already down the road on his, not looking back. _

_I took my bike out of our white picket fence and swung my leg over the seat, catching my balance and heading off with Sophia and James now much farther ahead of me. I looked back one last time, my mother and father standing in the door frame, sad, and then turned forward. Suddenly, the air that which had previously smelt like salt and the waves that had been crashing on the shore had gone, like time had stopped around me for only a moment. The world held its breath and I was the heart, the only thing that was moving as everything else was fixated at one precise moment in time. I looked back, and a bittersweet feeling hit me in the gut and I stopped my bike. Everything went still._

_I could feel my blood beating through my body, constantly rolling like how the waves had just crashed. My parents still held their pose for the moment, and it almost seemed like I was meant to watch. I was meant to look and remember and see what it was like right now in this moment as I left them._

_"C'mon, El!" my sister chimed to me once again, and my head jerked forward so I could see both her and James circling back to ride with me._

_I looked down, gripping the handlebars tightly, and began pedaling. The waves crashed again and I could smell the salt as vividly as ever, but even as the world finally caught its breath, I felt like it was ending at the same time._

* * *

King Peter, Lucy, and Evangeline became only figures behind me as the carriage finally began moving, our estimated time of arrival in Anvard being tomorrow morning.

"I hope you never get carsick. You'll probably me sick of me by the time we cross the Archenland border," Edmund hummed to me, still looking out the window on his seat across from me in the rustling carriage.

I turned to him and erupted in laughter. "That may be true. But I plan to sleep the majority of the time."

"You're no fun, then," he teased. I pretended to doze off as I leaned against the glass of the window.

I heard him chuckle, but I didn't open my eyes because I actually felt myself getting tired and I wasn't going to stop myself from falling asleep. Just like that, I was gone and back again.

"Cricket, we are stopping now," I heard a voice say. Ed was staring at me as I looked up at him, myself now sprawled out across the cushioned seat of the carriage.

"Are we there yet?" I asked hopefully, rubbing my eyes as I sat up.

Ed didn't look up from the book he was reading as he flipped a page. "Sadly, no. You've only been asleep for a few hours."

My eyes widened. "Then why are we stopping?"

Ed shrugged. "Bathroom break, probably. We all need a stretch, too, because I hear this is the last place to stop for a long time."

"What time is it?"

"Two."

I rubbed my eyes again, still awfully tired even though I had been sleeping the whole trip. I had barely gotten any sleep last night due to all my nerves of leaving Cair Paravel. It was the closest thing I had to a home in a very long time, and I didn't want to go out of my way to corrupt everything I had managed to build there. I sat back against the cushion, shutting my eyes, listening to the beat of the wooden wheels of the carriage against the road.

"Cricket, we're getting out soon. I don't think it's a good idea for you to fall asleep again."

"Oh, shut it, Goose," I said, completely still as I listened to the wheels some more, a constant beat moving in circles.

Then it stopped.

"We are here," Edmund told me, Opening the door and stepping outside. I followed him, and took his hand as I stepped out onto the dirt road we had been traveling on. Wherever we were, it was on the very edge of civilization. One small cottage sat square in the middle of a grassy field, the last of its kind. One direction went towards Narnia, and the castle of Cair Paravel still stood in the distance as a faint spot on the horizon. The other direction, the one we were heading in, lead one dirt path down towards grassland on either side.

The sun was particularly bright today and as it shined down on my shoulders I felt very warm. Edmund let go of my hand as we made our way towards the beaten down building on the edge through the overgrown grass of the fields.

"Lovely day," Susan noted as we met up with her on our walk over. "What have you two been up to?"

Edmund answered, "I've been reading. Eleanor has been sleeping."

Susan's eyes widened. "The whole time?"

I nodded.

"That's not good, you know. You'll never sleep when you're supposed to," she explained, looking at Edmund. "Try to keep her awake next time."

"I tried, I tried," he said, though I rolled my eyes at him.

We finally reached the cottage, which I was surprised to find out was actually a bar, and went to the bathroom. Terros, one of the men guiding the horses, and his crew asked us for drinks on our way inside but I declined. I wondered if drinking was the best thing for them since they were the ones leading the carriages.

I didn't have any more time for this thought as I entered the bathroom. I took extra long to stand at the sink and splashed cold water on my face, making sure I was awake enough for the rest of the day.

As I stared at myself in the oval golden-frames mirror, my fingers drumming on the marble countertops of the bathroom, my key caught my attention.

_"C'mon, El!" Sophia's voice echoed._

I rubbed my hands over my eyes as I rinsed my face again. I was still doubtful I would manage to stay awake until an appropriate time came to fall asleep, but nevertheless, I left the bathroom much faster than I thought I would.

The wooden door of the bar shut behind me loudly as I stepped back into the glaring sunlight, making the trip back to the carriages. The air was much more humid than I remembered as I walked, the only noise being the cicadas just beyond the brush of the trees. When I finally made it back, Edmund and Susan hasn't come yet so I sat inside alone, flipping through one of the books I had brought to keep me occupied.

"El, honesty?"

My head snapped up and I looked to see the figure of Edmund in the doorway of the carriage, now sitting, a look of disbelief on his face.

My head went down and I saw the book in my lap, though I don't remember reading it.

"What?"

"You feel asleep, again," he said, the carriage beginning to move. "We hadn't even left yet."

"I'm sorry," I replied. "I splashed water on my face and everything. I'm just really tired, I guess."

"Yeah, I bet," he answered, grabbing the book from my lap and closing it. "Talk to me."

"About?"

"Anything. Anything to keep you awake."

"Why don't you talk?"

"You'll fall asleep!"

"What makes you so sure?"

"I've seen it happen, El."

I smiled. "What do you want me to talk about?"

He contemplated the thought for a moment. "I'll say a word, and you have to give me an adjective describing the word. GO."

"What's the word?" I asked him.

"Books. GO."

"Interesting."

"Swords."

"Heavy," I said. He laughed.

"What about horses?"

"Nice."

He looked out the window. "Clouds."

"Pretty."

"Trees."

"Tall. This is boring," I answered, a yawn escaping me.

"I don't know what else to do!" he said. "You'll fall asleep to anything."

"I'm sorry," I muttered, another yawn escaping. "I didn't get a lot of sleep last night."

"Nerves?"

"What else?"

"Right," he said, and then a sly grin planted itself on his face. Before I could say anything, the wind was knocked out of me as Ed began tickling me.

"Edmund, NO!" I screeched in between laughs, trying to push him away. He didn't stop, but I found myself laughing so hard I didn't have any power over him as he continued, making my sides burn and my insides crawl.

After a minute, he said, "Alright, if you say so..."

He released me, plopping down next to me on my seat. I shoved him as soon as I got the chance, muttering a "You idiot," along the way. He just chuckled.

"What should we do next?" he asked curiously, looking out the window. I laughed. "After that, you can stay to yourself. I'm just going to sit here quietly."

"Fine by me, just don't fall asleep," he warned, swinging his legs up onto the seat and stretching them out. I rolled my eyes and did the same, both of us stretched out on the minimal space we had on the seat together.

I set my head back against the wall of the carriage and listened to the beat of the wheels again. Constant...

"Hey!" Ed yelled, tapping my boot. "No sleeping."

My eyes shot open. "How long as it been?"

"Hmm... I'd say about ten seconds..."

"Shit."

He locked eyes with me for a moment before looking outside the glass window, all the fingerprints completely visible from the sun's rays. An idea seemed to be coming into his mind. "I spy with my little eye..."

"Okay, Ed, I'm not four years old," I whined. "Why don't we just talk? You don't have to tell me a story. We could just have a normal conversation."

He scrunched up his nose jokingly. "Nah. I don't think that's us."

I began shaking his leg. "C'mon, Ed. Take me seriously for five minutes."

"Alright, alright," he complied. "How long have you been in Narnia for, again?"

"Just before summer began, so almost two months," I answered.

"And are you enjoying yourself?"

I ignored his tone of sarcasm as I answered. "Very much, thank you. And how about you? Are you enjoying your stay in Narnia?"

"Well, this is my second time around," he explained. "The first time it was just my siblings and I ruling Narnia after the White Witch was defeated. The second, Caspian called us because he needed help defeating Miraz, which we did. We haven't seen Aslan in five years, since Caspian's coronation."

My head jerked up. "Five years?"

"Yes, why?"

_ I felt like it was ending at the same time._

I rubbed my eyes. "Nothing. It's just... It's been five years since my family died."

Trying not to sound as sad as I actually was, I managed a small smile, but Edmund's body stiffened. "Coincidence. I'm sure."

I refused to meet his gaze, so instead I looked out the window, the landscape of the outside world one large, barren field. "What were your parents like, Goose?"

He surprised me by switching places with his feet on the seat so our shoulders and thighs were touching. I looked at him curiously.

"So you can't doze off," he explained, and because I nodded, he continued. "My father was a soldier, maybe he still is, I don't know," he looked down. "I don't remember much about the small things, like his favorite color or his favorite thing to do, but when he was around, I remember he hated telephones," I interrupted him by laughing, and he couldn't help but smile as well as I watched him. "I'm serious. He thought the whole bit was nonsense. If someone wanted to see him, _they would come to him. _He thought calling was an easy way out to make up time and anybody who wouldn't see him wasn't important."

"So you're father and my father couldn't have sat down and had a drink together?" I asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"My father was a photographer for the newspaper, remember? He loved all that technological stuff," I said. Edmund looked down at his hands with a smile on his face while he murmured an, "I suppose so."

After another moment of silence, he started up again. "But he was a good man. He liked helping people. That's why he was in the war. He told once it was all over he wanted to teach."

"I always though teaching would be really fun," I said.

"Well, you'd be good at it, El," Ed noted, meeting my eyes. "My father loved books as well, and my mother did just the same, but she didn't teach. She did war work during the Blitz. She was very caring, like Susan, because she always wanted us to do the best to stay out of trouble."

"Were you a rotten child?" I asked, half joking.

"I actually was," he admitted, looking away from me. "Peter and I fight every once it a while now, but back then I hated having to follow his orders. Nobody ever took me seriously, and if he told me to do something, I would do the opposite just so he couldn't have the satisfaction of having power over me. "

I smiled. "Well, you turned out alright."

He rolled his eyes and shifted in his seat. "Thanks. What about you? Were you a rotten child?"

_"Jesus, mom. I'm coming!" _

"I had a couple screws sticking out, I'll admit," I told him, but suddenly as I spoke the words it was like all these feelings and memories I had came flowing back. "My mother was very optimistic, about everything, so you can imagine her surprise when her children were not the same."

"I'm sure she didn't mind," he said to me. I shook my head.

"If she did, she didn't show it," I mentioned, and then all of a sudden the tables turned and I found _myself _telling the stories; all the times Sophia and James and I would go to the beach, and my father teaching me how to swing dance, my mother playing the piano as we did it...

And how my mother loved to sing, and we had a dog when we were very young which Sophia named Lonnie because she liked the sound of it, and James and I riding downtown where we pick up groceries and watch as hopeful soldier recruits would put their name on a list to be taken away to a land of gun shots and scars that wouldn't go away, a land James dreamed of going to.

And the first day my father came home with his camera, both of my parents ecstatic that he managed to get a job during the war, and how he set it up all nice and had us take a picture together, and later in the day I had stuffed my whole dinner in my mouth, and my father got a picture of that, too.

I was laughing hysterically, looking back and realizing how silly I was, and Edmund was laughing right along with me.

And then when I was ten my mother was sick, so my brother and I took it upon ourselves to make her feel better (it was my father's idea), and we were scared she would get mad when we painted _LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL _in big, messy letters on the stone wall looking towards the beach, a wall my mother could see through the window, in bed, upstairs.

"But she wasn't mad," I told Ed, playing with his hand like I always found myself doing when we sat next to each other. "She loved it so much, and even after how happy she was, my father didn't say anything about being involved."

And then one day, my father taught us how to fly kites on the beach, but the wind wasn't working in our favor so I accidentally sliced him across the face with the tail of the kite.

I found myself laughing, and remembering, and almost bringing myself to tears as Edmund listened to me intently when I told him the stories. Real ones. Ones in life that were so much better than whatever I had read in those books. As I told the stories, the barren field of emptiness outside had suddenly gone away, and the world held its breath again, the only two people knowing anything about this particular time being Edmund and I, sitting in the carriage. The world was gone, and I was weak because of it, revealing all this to a boy who I had only met a little over a month ago. And for some reason, even when the world got its lungs back, and everything outside was real again, I was okay with it.

"Why do you always do this?" Ed asked curiously, looking down at our hands, which I had been playing with.

"I don't know," I answered, dazed. "Hands are so weird, if you think about it. It just keeps me occupied when I talk or I'm listening to someone else speak."

"Lots of things are weird, if you think about it," he said, looking at me. "Like toes. Who ever thought of those?"

I grinned and flipped his hand over nonchalantly. "I think they're for balance, Ed."

"Right. Otherwise we'd all have to roll around in carts. Very clever thinking, whoever designed the anatomy of humans," he mused, as I threw my head back in laughter. When I did this, the muscles and bones in his hands fought back against mine as he put our hands up palm to palm. "Your hands are so small."

I watched his face as he observed our hands together intently, and then without saying anything, he intertwined our fingers. Rubbing his pointer finger over my thumb, he gazed at me, and suddenly I lost myself in his eyes as I stared at me, not saying a thing at all.

He hummed softly to himself for a moment before his hand went limp and landed on his lap. We both just sat in the silence for a long time, the only thing reminding us that we were here and we were alive being the beat of the wheels underneath us. I wasn't tired anymore. I felt like my whole soul had been stretched out just beyond the walls of the carriage, and I was content with or without talking.

Many hours later, after another chat and another passing of ideas, the sun was setting and I found myself getting drowsy once again. This time however, Edmund let me go willingly and I found myself drifting off into the dark before I had time to thank him.

The next morning we had come to Anvard, a place much like Cair Paravel, and we were greeted by a young man named Tirerius who began showing us the castle with his nose pointed far too high and a voice with a very unpleasant timbre. I stifled a laugh and looked at Edmund, trying his hardest to be regal, but I knew deep down he was probably thinking the exact same thing.

* * *

**Author's Note: Chapter fourteen... WOW! Believe it or not, I didn't think I'd get this far. I'd like to thank SweetSunnyRose and Little Missus for your lovely reviews. I'd also like to thank Madeline932 for favoriting and Miinnahuovinen, A Fearless Knight's Fairytale, and youaregonnacatchacold for following! :)**

**Review? (^o^)**


	15. A Ceaseless Pit

Susan

"Queen Susan, miss, King Adonis and Prince Solomon request your company now," a woman from the door frame of my suite said. One of my other chamber maids, Helena, had just finished helping me prepare for the ball, a lavish red dress with lots of embroidery along the torso now on myself. I thanked the woman at the door, and then she curtseyed and left the room. Turning to the wall length mirror beside the large, wooden armoire, I looked myself over before deciding I was satisfied. Helena then proceeded to show me towards the door. Outside, Tirerius, stood with Edmund, looking very regal in his dark blue Narnian-style clothing.

"Queen Susan, you look magnificent as always," Tirerius said to me, his short, brown hair carefully slicked back, framing his face.

Managing a smile to him, I said, "Thank you, Tirerius. Shall we go now?"

Looking back at Edmund, who kept on a very serious face, I reluctantly took Tirerius's arm as we headed to the King Adonis's study. The man wasn't that much taller than me, even without my shoes, but he sure did keep his chin held high.

He began rambling about the history of the tapestry that hung like streams of sunlight from the windows, but I blocked out his voice as he seemed like the type who just liked to hear himself talk. Seeing the sun nearly setting outside on the unfamiliar Archenland horizon made me realize what an eventful day it has been. I'm sure underneath all the make-up I looked tired, especially considering Edmund, Eleanor, and I arrived on Anvard grounds early this morning. Once we arrived, Tirerius gave us a quick tour of the castle before we had lunch in our private living quarters, due to the fact that the dining room was being decorated for the ball tonight.

Seeing Eleanor react to the grand guest rooms of Anvard made me smile, especially when she first opened the double doors of her suite and her jaw dropped. She was not used to being treated like royalty because back at Cair Paravel she was a only a guest of ours, but here, she may as well be one of us because she was travelling with my brother and me.

"And here we are," Tirerius said, averting me back to where I stood beside him. He knocked three times on a large set of wooden doors, which stretched up all the way to the very top trim of the ceiling, lighted by a brass chandelier hanging in the hallway we currently stood in.

Only a moment later, a tall man with graying hair, who I recognized to be King Adonis, opened the door, a bright smile on his face.

He clapped his hands together. "King Edmund! Queen Susan! Welcome to Anvard, once again," dismissing Tirerius, he turned to look at another man who had left the office and stood right beside his father, a man who I remembered to be much more scrawny. "This is my son, Prince Solomon, of Archenland."

Prince Solomon stepped forward and took my hand, placing a soft kiss along the top of it. "Queen Susan, it's a pleasure to finally have you here," he straightened up, so now we were eye to eye. King Adonis placed a hand on his shoulder. "Why don't we begin walking down to the procession of the ball, King Edmund? And let these two catch up."

Edmund had no reason but to oblige so I watched as he and King Adonis stepped ahead, immersing themselves in conversation. Prince Solomon offered his arm to me, which I carefully took as we began walking in step about ten feet behind them.

"You do look wonderful tonight, Queen Susan. Your beauty is talked about throughout all of Archenland," he complimented me, glancing sideways.

"Thank you, Prince Solomon. You look very nice as well," I said, noticing his Archenland garb. "Have we met before?"

"You recognize me?"

"Of course I do," I said. "Wasn't it last summer when all of my siblings and I came to visit? I believe that was the first time we met."

"It was, wasn't it?" he mused. "It feels like it could have been yesterday."

"Time does fly," I murmured as we entered the holding room in front of the large doors that I recognized to lead to the ball. I bid Prince Solomon farewell, receiving another kiss on the hand as we parted. Edmund and I entered the together this time, walking up the large stone steps that came up to a dais on which we stood as our names were announced to the crowds.

_Queen Susan the Gentle of Narnia, and King Edmund the Just of Narnia, personal guests of King Adonis and Prince Solomon. _

Anvard was very different from Cair Paravel, and it was very easy to tell upon first glance that this was not home. While Cair Paravel lain on the ocean, the breeze and waves constantly in hearing, Anvard was completely landlocked, and because of that, it had a much simpler décor, no influence from the water or the animals like Narnia did.

As the crowd cheered, Edmund whispered beside me, "All humans. It's weird to think that's weird."

I laughed. "I know. I'm so used to all different types of creatures."

We stepped off the dais and onto more glassy stone steps that lead us down to the dance floor. Soon after, Prince Solomon and his father were announced, and the festivities began.

Music began playing, people began talking, and it suddenly felt very familiar to be in the midst of chatter. I had lost Edmund in the crowd, probably as he was going to look for Eleanor who we hadn't seen in a long time, and so I found myself looking for Solomon.

When I did, after making small talk with a few of the other Lords and Ladies, he stayed by my side the whole night. We talked together, and danced a few times, and when dinner came, he requested I sit next to him.

We talked and talked and talked, about nothing important and all, and all the while I didn't feel anything. I didn't know if this was good or bad or not.

The night was growing very old so many of the elder couples who had previously come had left, leaving a much smaller group of people in the ballroom until the very early hours of the morning. As this began to happen, I found myself on the balcony outside, alone, finally peeled away from Solomon for some fresh air.

Turning back to the balcony, I looked down at all the people below, leaving in big, black carriages with a lot of alcohol in their systems. Instinctively, I peered at my hand which held a small glass of champagne that I had barely touched.

I looked down again, and this time a group of many people who all had wine glasses in their hands approached a carriage, one of the older men opening the door for the ladies as they stepped inside, all happily laughing at a story a young red-haired woman had been telling her friends. The carriage slowly rolled away, their laughter dancing out in the air right in front of me even after they left.

I looked behind me and that's when I spotted Edmund and Eleanor together by the dessert table, laughing as Eleanor wiped a happy tear from her face. They way Edmund looked at her, it was almost as if he had known her for centuries, like he could tell who she was in and out, and even so he loved to be with her.

It was at that moment, watching everyone else together and joyful, when I realized I was the black sheep. I was out standing on the balcony, hiding from a Prince who seemed very close to being infatuated with me, and I wasn't happy. I knew the second I had stepped onto Archenland soil I wouldn't be happy. I didn't need the change. I was more content being alone but close with my family than convincing myself anything otherwise. I've spent over twenty years with them, and I'm not even as old as that.

Edmund wiped the tear from Eleanor's cheek as she smiled widely, throwing her head back in another fit of laughter.

It didn't even seem right for me to go try looking for love right now. Even with Caspian nothing ever changed. It was always complicated. And now, complication had become an old friend of mine. How could I get used to living otherwise?

I chuckled to myself, remembering how I had gone from England to Narnia in less than five minutes and I was perfectly fine with that.

I turned on my heel and stalked over to Edmund and Eleanor in desperation from where they stood, now feeling like I needed conversation as something to get me out of my thoughts so I could forget how deeply unhappy I was and how much I desperately wanted somebody to pull me out of the pit in which I had been digging myself into deeper each and every minute.

* * *

_Dear Susan, _

_I just received your letter. If you are really that frantic, just come home. It isn't worth anything if we must sacrifice your sanity. Peter told me to tell you that you should stay, but I don't see how that would work if you have no more interest in Prince Solomon or getting married at all._

_I know I'm much younger, but I definitely understand where you are coming from when you say you can't give up what we already have. I think we're very lucky as a family to actually genuinely like each other, and even though we have our problems I wouldn't be willing to give it up like that either, especially if I'm not happy._

_Caspian misses you. I can tell. I know you didn't talk much, but I can see from the way he doesn't hold the same kind of light in his eyes anymore from when he used to see you around. I don't know whether or not this will comfort you, but it's the truth, and if that does make you feel worse at least you'll actually know what's going on._

_I think we've had it all wrong. Caspian may have started like a stranger, but now we're in too deep, and he's a part of this family now. This is just my humble opinion, but maybe he started out as a love-interest, and now he's just like a brother._

_You'll probably laugh at that. I'm just trying to help. I miss you too, but other than that not much is going on here. I'm sure Edmund and Eleanor are having a great time. Tell them I said hello, and write me again if something comes up. _

_Love, Lucy_

* * *

_Dear Lucy,_

_I thought about what you said, and maybe you're right. Perhaps we have had it all wrong, but I don't know what to believe anymore. Either way, I've dug myself in a pit. I'm going to stay the rest of the summer, just to not cause any tension. The last thing I need right now is unfamiliar complication. _

_Ed says he misses you, and he wishes you could have come. He said he especially missed you when we all went to the pond yesterday. Remember that place we went cliff jumping? He took Eleanor out there. She seemed to have fun._

_I keep forgetting we are still trying to figure why Eleanor has come here, but nothing has popped up. Even small stuff in conversation doesn't seem to do anything, but even with that, what does it matter? _

_I'll keep writing, regardless of what happens. I'm missing you too, Lu. It's been a long time since we've been apart and now it's catching up to me. I'll see you in a few weeks._

_Love, Susan_

* * *

**Author's Note: Chapter 15... please tell me what you think. I wasn't entirely sure with this one, so if there's any problems, let me know! **

**Thank you to Rach1998 for your review and your kind words, I really appreciate it. I'd also liked to thank pischouette for following and SweetSunnyRose for the lovely review! I'll try to update as soon as possible but school is approaching D: Blechhh... I know. I'm going to try to write as much before then but I'm afraid once it does start, updates will only be about once a week.**

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	16. Falling from the Sky

Edmund

After the first ball at Anvard, I spent most of my time with King Adonis working out future plans of trade between Narnia and Archenland. If Susan did plan to marry Solomon, then the ties between our two countries would only be stronger, "a great advantage", Peter would say.

Regardless of the fact that I noticed my sister spending less and less time with Solomon, I still went each and every day to talk with King Adonis when he had a chance. I enjoyed his company as well, as he was quite a character with all the stories he told.

Solomon was different. Even though he was a good man, he wasn't like his father. King Adonis held a certainly air of compassion and he loved to be with people. Every time I came to see him, even just to chat, his eyes lit up and he quickly began telling me a story. I never met his wife, who died many years before we had come again, but I had heard that ever since she passed King Adonis spends all the time he can around people, partially as a way to keep his mind of things.

Prince Solomon is much more reclusive, only spending time with those he cared about, now Susan when she gave him the chance. I had a feeling deep in my gut she did not harbor those same feelings due to her subtle lack of interest.

Today, about two week s after we had arrived in Anvard, I decided to spend the whole day with Eleanor due to the fact that she has nearly made herself a stranger the past couple weeks. It got to the point where I only saw her at meal times and right before the evening ended when I bid her goodnight, but she seemed to be avoiding me, knowingly, seeing how I had come to Archenland for diplomatic matters.

We were joined by Susan as we each rode a horse, riding on one of the many dirt paths that lead out of the castle. I had finally managed to pry El away from her room because I knew she felt guilty if there was any reason at all that I needed to be there with King Adonis. I kept assuring her, and finally she complied.

"Where are we going again?" she asked, looking over to me and Susan as we continued trotting along.

"You'll see. We went here last year with Lucy, it's quite fun," Susan answered for me. Eleanor nodded, and then looked away, probably focusing on keeping her balance on the horse.

"Well, you made me wear my bathing suit, so I have a hunch," she murmured, mostly to herself, but I could hear her. After another minute, the trees on each side of the path began to open, and we found what we had been looking for.

I gave Susan a knowing smile as I hopped off my horse, the girls following my lead. We began walking towards the edge edge of the small cliff, looking out onto the pond below us. A waterfall was rushing wildly on one side, and on the other, a path lead down to the area where were planning to have lunch.

Eleanor's eyes widened, but she didn't say anything as we continued down the path, leaving the horses to wander up top.

Soon we got to the bottom, a clearing perfect for us to lie out and eat. I set down the bag I had brought and looked up to where we had just stood only minutes ago, my eyes following the long and winding path that brought us where we now stood.

"How did you find this place?" El said, mesmerized. Susan smiled as she sat down, setting up the blanket and laying her legs out in front of her.

"We had a day off last year, and we just went wandering," I explained, sitting next to Susan. Eleanor soon followed suit as she began unpacking the bag.

"What are doing?" I inquired curiously, observing her as she pulled out her food.

"Getting something to eat," she said simply. "Is something wrong with that?"

I grabbed the back from her and set it aside. "The idea is to go swimming first, or you might get sick," I stood up. "Are you coming, Sue?"

"I think I'll sit this one out. It's too nice right here," she said, her eyes closed with her head tipped back slightly, soaking in the hot, Archenland summer sunlight.

"Suit yourself," I muttered, slipping off my clothes so I stood only in my swimming trunks underneath. Eleanor looked at me inquisitively.

"What are we doing?"

"Cliff jumping."

"Cliff jumping?"

"Yes, we are going to jump from up there," I pointed to where our horses moseyed aimlessly, "To down there," I said, Eleanor's eyes following my hand as I moved it towards where the falls emptied into the pond.

She stood up, raising her eyes skeptically to the edge of the cliff as I began walking away. "Do what you have to do. I'll meet you up top."

A nervous expression passed her face, but she didn't say anything and only a minute later I found her jogging up to me as I made we made the trek back up to the top. Her bathing suit was like a dark blue mini dress, something we would wear even back in England, but I could help but glaze over her body as I she walked right next to me. I could feel that same burning sensation from when we were in the library begin to grow in my stomach.

"You've done this before, right?" she questioned, staring at me intently as she gripped my arm slightly. Her hands were somewhat shaking against my bare skin. I looked at her with concern in my eyes. "El, it will be fine. It's not that high, and once you do it the first time it's a lot of fun. These aren't even the highest falls."

"There are bigger ones?" she gaped in disbelief. I nodded, "Once you get over these ones, I can show you the others. None of them are bad. This will be the highlight of our summer."

She mumbled softly, "I've never liked heights, though."

"I didn't either, Cricket, but believe me, it's worth it," I consoled her, approaching the top where the land dropped off over the water. Her grip on my arm tightened as we got closer, peering over the edge, and I glanced at her sideways, "Do you want to go together, or should I go first?"

Her hand instantly left my arm as she replied, "You can go first."

I rolled my eyes at her as I turned my back, getting closer and closer to the edge. I was preparing to jump, but then a thought entered my mind, making me turn around and ask, "You can swim, right?"

She nodded slowly. "I can, I just haven't in a long time."

I contemplated a though for the moment, and then I said, "Okay. If anything happens I'll be right down there."

She nodded again, so I turned my back and jumped, in free fall in the air and watching the world in front of my eyes over the trees make its appearance. Only a moment later, I hit the water smoothly, not as warm as I thought it would be.

I surfaced, looking up at her as she bit her lip tensely at the edge. "I'll be right here," I said, her arms falling to her sides. She shook them out and then peered over the edge again, looking down at me. "Should I just jump?" she said, taking a step back.

"Or fall. Sometimes it's good just to fall," I called up to her. Before I knew it, she was in the air, in free fall with her eyes shut tight. When she broke contact with the water, if made a soft crackling noise. I swam over to her as she surfaced.

"Are you alright?" I asked, wiped one of the pieces of hair from her face.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I think I just hit my arm weird, that's all," she said, looking over to the falls. I could see the pink racing up her left arm as I came closer to her, motioning for her to lift it so I could see. The outside, which was already pink, was now turning to a deeper red. As I reached my hand over to touch it, she flinched back. "Sorry," I muttered quickly swimming to her side so I could look at it better without contact.

"It doesn't feel that bad if you don't touch it, Ed, I think it's fine," she said slowly, beginning to swim over to the shore. I watched her as she swam to make sure she wasn't struggling, and then I followed her.

Once on shore again, I looked over to her, "So what did you think?"

"I thought it was fine," she said softly. I raised my eyes skeptically. "You're probably not as excited because you shut your eyes and didn't get to see it."

"See what?"

I pointed over to where the trees turned back into a forest, not very far from where we stood. "Over the break of trees, you can see the whole world. It's like you're flying."

She bit her lip again, and that's when I noticed she was shivering. "C'mon!" I said, pulling her with me to the top once again. She clung loosely to me, her lips turning blue, so I made a run of it.

When I looked back, she was jogging behind me, "What was that for?"

"So you would warm up," I said. She smiled slightly, and then we both approached the edge again.

"Can we go together this time?" she asked sheepishly. I nodded, taking her hand in mine. "Just jump, don't think," I told her. Her mouth tightened but she nodded hastily, causing her hair to bounce loosely below her shoulders.

"One…"

"Two…" her grip on my hand tightened considerably as I spoke that word, "Three."

And then we were in the air, same experience as before for me, a rush of wind creeping through my bones as I held her hand. The jump only lasted a few seconds, but I had time to briefly look over at her, smiling.

We hit the water, and we didn't let go of each other's hands as we surfaced.

"That was incredible!" she nearly screeched. I grinned. "I told you that would make it more exciting."

She smiled back at me, finally letting go of our hands and floating on her back.

"Do you want to do again?" I asked.

"No, but maybe a little bit. Let's drift for a while," she breathed, looking up at the sky. I rolled onto my back as well, lying next to her in the water and watching the sky above us. It was a clear blue day, perfect for swimming, and if there weren't lines of trees poking out in my peripheral vision I would felt like my body was in mid-air, held just above the surface of the ground.

I looked over at Eleanor with her eyes fixed loosely on the sky, and the burning sensation came back. I looked away.

"Are you having a silent fit with yourself, or something?" she questioned sarcastically, reminding me of when I said that to her at the ball.

I managed a laugh. "No, but I remember you were. You were all fidgety when we were dancing."

"You remember that?"

"Of course I do, why wouldn't I?"

She sighed, a grin planting itself on her face. "Nothing. I just didn't think you would because you had been drinking."

"No," I exhaled. "I couldn't forget the first time you had real, genuine fun in Narnia."

Another moment passed, the only sounds coming from the falls and the wind, and we both just lied on the water, like lily pads floating but having no effect on the world around them.

I peered over at Eleanor who already had her head turned slightly, glazing over me.

"What are you staring at?"

Her big, brown eyes didn't move as she spoke. "A goose."

I laughed and then turned my vision back to the sky. Eleanor got off her back and the water lapped underneath me as she swam away. I got off of my back as well and turned to see her sitting on the very edge of the pond with her feet sticking out into the water, basking in the sun.

"London never gets this warm," she said happily, eyes closed in the sunlight. I moved over to her and stood in the water, now only knee deep. She opened one eye and glanced up at me. "Goose, what are you staring at?"

I rolled my eyes and plopped down next to her, suddenly thankful for all the benefits training to fight gave me.

She looked behind us at Susan who lay on the blanket, completely still.

"She looks asleep," I said.

El nodded slightly, looking at her feet in the water, and rubbed the side of one of them with the other.

"Edmund, can I ask you something?"

My eyes fell onto her, being shy by not looking at me. "Of course."

Her hair fell over her shoulder as she turned to me, and it was then I saw how beautiful she was, and not the kind of beautiful that could be seen right away, the kind that was found once you dug deeper and could see how lovely she really was, like the rain. I could see it in her eyes, which crinkles in the sides when she smiled, and how much loved to laugh, too. I don't know how, but it was all of a sudden I understood why I loved being with her so much, even if I couldn't put it into words.

"Do you believe in miracles?" she said simply, watching me as she spoke.

I turned away from her, "I don't know. I'd like to believe I've earned all the things I've been given, and maybe I have seen a miracle, but I didn't interpret it that way. I believe in them, to some extent. Why do you ask?"

She picked up my hand and began playing with it again, a habit I didn't mind at all. "My mother... she just believed in them, religiously," she paused. "And because she did, so did I."

"Did?"

"My mother spent her whole life looking for one, and I don't know why, and now since she's gone I feel like I should keep looking. I don't know if I want to, though. She told me they come when you least expect it, and if I keep looking for it, and if it actually comes, won't it be not as special?"

Her fingers traced the inside of my palm, a shiver running up my side. I shifted in my spot. "I suppose so. But it's pretty miraculous you came here, right?"

"Yeah, but my sister-"

"You can't blame yourself for that, Eleanor," I interrupted, her face washing over solemn as she turned away. Her mouth hung loosely open as if she were going to say something but Susan called from behind us, "You two want to eat lunch? It's getting kind of late, and we should head back soon if we don't want to get caught in the dark."

I turned to see her already setting up the food we had brought so we both walked over to her. Susan talked about everything there was to talk about, except for Prince Solomon, which I found pleasantly ironic.

Soon it was time to go, so we all packed and Eleanor went to go change in the trees. When she came out, I did the same, and then we met Susan up by the horses and said goodbye to the falls.

When we got back to the castle, there was little time to freshen up before we ventured to dinner, even though I guessed none of us were particularly hungry. As per usual, King Adonis has much to say about nothing in particular, and each one of went off to our own rooms for night.

Except for Eleanor and I.

Both of us were sitting on the couch of my suite laughing about all the fun we had today, reminiscing, when she yawned.

"Tired?" I grinned.

"Yeah," she answered, bring a fist up to her mouth as she yawned again. "I just wish Lucy could have been with us. I'm sure she would have liked to come."

"She would have wanted you to go," I said, and then the light shined on her eyes fight at the right moment for me to notice something. I moved closer to her. "Wait a minute; your eyes aren't completely brown."

She gave me a confused smile. "Yeah, I know."

"They're a little green."

"Yeah, I know."

I rolled my eyes at her sarcasm, realizing how much closer I was to her face now. The burning sensation came back into my stomach as she watched me, and I tried to move back I couldn't move.

"Ed, are you okay?" she asked, furrowing her brows.

My mouth hung open for a moment before I said, "Yes. I just had fun today, that's all."

She leaned on the back of the couch with her elbow and held her head in her hand. "Well, then we should go back sometime. When you're around, again, that is."

"El, you don't need to feel bad about any of that. I'd rather be with you than anybody else," I blurted out, her eyes grower slightly bigger at what I had said. My words hung out in the air, like somehow they had broken down a barrier down between us, and we both watched each other carefully for another moment for everything to turn back to normal.

She turned and faced forward, being shy again, and that's when I knew she felt the same. It was coming off of her, and I've been with her long enough to have a general idea about how she felt. She didn't turn away due to discomfort. She turned because she didn't know if I actually meant it.

"El, can I tell you a story?" I asked her. She leaned back in the couch, remaining forward, and then nodded slightly, setting a loose gaze on the empty fireplace.

"This one doesn't have a name…" I began. "And it's kind of short but-"

"Let me guess," she said curtly, turning her head slowly towards me. "It's about a skinny love."

"Skinny love?" I repeated, confusion clear in my tone.

"Yes, it's sort of this thing where…" she paused for a moment, looking down at her hands. "Two people are too shy to admit they like each other, or they don't what they feel, but it's just in the way they show it. You can tell they care for each other."

She stood up abruptly, turning so I couldn't face her.

"I'm assuming there's something you want to tell me," I said cautiously, standing up and walking up behind her. Her arms were crossed, but I could tell she was frustrated just by the way she whirled around to face me and spoke through gritted teeth. "Don't you dare do that to me, Edmund Pevensie. You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"What do you want me to tell you, El?" I nearly yelled in hindrance, watching her as she brought her hands up to her forehead.

"I want you to be honest with me. Why are doing this?"

"Doing what?"

She brought her arms down abruptly, the air in the room becoming painfully silent as she spoke. "Why do you care about me so much?"

"Because I like you, is that so hard to believe?"

"No, I mean seriously, Ed," she said sternly, looking at me straight in the eye. "Explain to me what that means, since I'm not too sure. Are you doing it because you feel bad for me? You only talk to me only out of pity? Because that's what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid you don't actually care and when I'm back to where I've come from when this is all over all you're going to think is how proud you are of yourself for being nice to me and knowing you made my time here worthwhile in one way or another. I don't like not knowing, Ed. Please tell me I'm crazy for even having any feelings for you so we can go back to things how they were and I won't feel so lost."

And there she stood, in complete oblivion and feeling lost, and I was in free fall, like when we went cliff jumping. Except this time, when I looked over to her and she was smiling brightly at what she saw, and when we surfaced, I…

I stepped towards her closely now, so I could feel her breathing deeply, her big green-brown eyes looking at me intently. The words still didn't come.

I brought my hands up and placed them gently on either side of her face. Without a single word, I leaned down and brought her lips to mine into a kiss, finally knowing what it felt like. And then she surprised me, by leaning in deeper and bringer her hands up behind my shoulder blades, like this is the answer she was looking for, and she didn't have to be lost, because I wasn't so stupid as to think lying to her about how I felt would help. Now I was positive it wouldn't. The walls had crashed in front of us and now, together, it was like we were falling from the sky.

I stepped closer so our bodies were pressed against each, and held her just underneath her jaw bone, deepening the kiss even more. After another moment, she parted from me, her forehead pressed against my chin.

I kissed the top of her head tenderly, holding her in my chest, and she was completely still.

"Edmund?" she said after a moment, looking up at me.

"Yes?"

She looked slightly nervous as she turned away. "Sorry I kind of exploded on you before. I was just really confused."

I chuckled. "Me, too, and it's alright."

She managed a smile, observing her feet, and then I dropped my arms from her, both of us just watching, waiting to see if something else would happen. She turned away shy, and then bid me goodnight. Never before have I ever been so sad to watch her go.

* * *

**Author's Note: Whoop! And there it goes! Took sixteen chapters for them to admit they like each other! I hope everyone enjoyed this... thank you to SweetSunnyRose for her continual support and wonderful reviews and to lucyinthesky1249 for following! :)**

**Review? (^o^)**


	17. And If I Had Known It Was Goodbye

Eleanor

Edmund Pevensie made my insides burn.

He made me want to rip my hair out, just so I could fix it all over again. He made me want to scratch out my eyes, just so I wouldn't have to endure the pain when he walked away from me. He made me want to sing out loud to the whole world just so they could hear how happy I was, and he made me want to crawl up into a ball and never see the light of day again.

I couldn't endure this... feeling...anymore. It was something I have never felt. The moment he kissed me, it was like a bomb went off and havoc was rushing through the streets, totally out of my control. I wanted to hate it, I really did, but I couldn't turn my back to him. I needed him. Too much. And I couldn't bear to think of one day when this would all come to an end and Edmund would no longer be a goose, my goose, and I would not longer be his cricket.

It scared me, to think of how much I needed him. It was like as we were too busy living our everyday lives, suddenly this wave of... this feeling... curved over us, getting closer and closer, and there was nothing either one of us could have done about it.

And yet, I loved it all the same.

* * *

We haven't talked in a couple days, but I did see him at meals. Eye contact made my stomach flutter, a small touch as we passed by each other, it was all the same. I kept inwardly scolding myself whenever my gaze drifted at dinner, and his eyes would meet mine, and then I would turn away, playing with my hands as the meal continued. And then after, I would pass him by in the hall, and our hands would casually touch as we slid past. Or worse, his hand would briefly graze over the side of my leg, and my eyes could have shut right in that instant if I allowed them. He would smile at me for only a second, then he was gone, and then I would squeeze my eyes shut and imagine that the biggest, most goofy looking grin had planted itself on my face.

Most days I spent alone, reading, on the balcony of my room. The thing I liked least about Anvard was the fact that I didn't have the gorgeous ocean to look out to, and the smell of the salt. It was rejuvenating back home in Narnia.

Home. I couldn't believe I actually called it that. I suppose even though I didn't have family there, it still could be home. I mean, if Narnia wasn't home, I don't know what was. Maybe back in London when Sophia was with me, but once she left, so did that essence of whatever "home" felt like.

Huh.

I leaned back on the lounger in which I sat on the balcony, the now familiar Archenland sun beginning its descent to the horizon. Looking down at the book in my lap, The Complete History of Ancient Archenland, a great novel Susan managed to get me somehow, probably through Prince Solomon, I flipped one of its pages.

And then another.

And another.

And another.

I sighed, twenty pages later, and looked up, the sun now a half circle against the sky, looking like if I walked to the edge of the land, I could touch it.

"El, what are you doing?"

I nearly jumped out of my spot as I turned to him, a sheepish grin on his face once he saw me squirm.

"Damn you, Ed. Did you forget it's customary to knock on someone's door before you come in?"

I moved my feet to one side and sat up slightly as he sat down at the end of my chair and said, "Yeah, well, it's just you. And I knew you would be out here reading. You don't do much else."

"I don't need to do anything else, Goose," I told him, skimming through the last paragraph of the page and then turning to the next. I heard him chuckle in front of me.

"What?" I said, shooting him an inquisitive look.

He looked out at the sky, a strand of his dark hair falling over her forehead. "Nothing. I just haven't talked to you in a couple days and the first thing you say is to me is 'Damn you.'"

I grinned. "Sorry," and turned my eyes back to the book, "You don't have to be anywhere else now, do you?"

"El, c'mon. You know if I had to be anywhere else I would be there, even though you know I want to be here," he reached over and pulled the book out of my grasp. "You read all the time. Lets do something together."

He set it down beside the chair, took my hands and pulled me up from my seat. With our fingers intertwined by my hips, I looked at him and then looked down at my feet, out of habit.

"What do you want to do?" I asked softly, observing his feet. He chuckled, and then craned his neck close to me and stole a kiss from my check. A blush rose to my face, but I didn't look up at him. I began playing with his hands as they were held together by our sides.

I heard him exhale.

"I know why you do that," he said, very softly. I didn't look up. "You do it when you get nervous, or when you don't know what to say. That's why when we were dancing, you were so nervous. You had no hands to play with, so you wanted me to keep my mouth shut so I couldn't make you any more apprehensive. You probably don't realize why you do it, but I figured it's probably instinct by now."

His words crawled up my spine as my hands went limp, still held by his. I didn't look up, so I just stared at his chest. "You're right. I didn't know that."

"So I make you nervous?" he asked, very matter-of-factly which agitated me a bit.

"No. Stop flattering yourself."

"Stop acting like its a bad thing."

I couldn't help but release a smile as I moved my gaze to his shoulder. "You frustrate me, Edmund Pevensie."

"Yeah, do I?" he said, jokingly, a smile on his face too.

"Yeah."

"Alright, well, why don't you look at me and tell me?" he said.

I sighed, my gaze finally moving to his eyes, both of which were planted intently on me. "You frustrate me, Edmund Pevensie. Why are you going this?"

"So you won't be as shy," he explained, and then added, "and nervous. You were rarely like that before."

"For some reason, like now, I feel like you can see through me. That's probably why. I'm pretty much an open book. I don't have much to hide from you anymore," I said suddenly, unsure of how I managed to get those words out.

"But still, you get nervous-"

"Thanks for pointing that out, again," I said exasperatedly. His head fell as he laughed, and instantly my head fell foreword so it leaned against his. He slowly slid his head back up, our faces staying connected the whole time. After another moment, our foreheads met, creating an space so our mouths were less than an inch apart. He watched me, I could feel it, and then finally, he closed the space between us by lifting my chin and bring my lips to his. My hands found their way to his neck, inadvertently drawing circles on the back of it, and his wrapped themselves around my torso, bringing us so close that our bodies we pushed flush against each other. He deepened the kiss, and suddenly his hands were holding my hips firmly. I parted.

"Edmund Pevensie, you frustrate me," I breathed against his forehead, causing him to grin.

I backed away from him and stepped towards the edge of the balcony, my eyes reverting their attention to the sun, which was now only a small speck on the horizon, whispering the stars which would soon come out onto the sky's canvas.

Ed came up from behind me, wrapping his arms around my torso, and placed his chin on my shoulder. "El, don't you know that you do the same thing to me?"

I didn't say anything, not really sure what to say, so I just looked out at the sun, now disappearing.

"You make me nervous, too. It's nothing to be embarrassed about. It is what it is."

"I make you nervous?" I questioned skeptically. "Ed, you're not like me. Like I said, to you I'm an open book. I don't have much more to say. And with that, I feel like I can't hide anything from you, which isn't a bad thing, but you're-"

"Better at hiding my feelings that you," he finished. I turned my neck towards him. "So I make you nervous?" I said mockingly, and this time he was the one to turn his gaze away. "No fun being the one on the spot, right?"

He laughed softly, and turned back to me. His grip around my torso tightened, and then I felt his fingers flex out in preparation.

My eyes widened. "Ed, no."

But he did it anyway, with a huge smile on his face. His fingers came back into my sides, making them burn, and making me squirm in his grasp. I tried to pull away, but I couldn't help but laugh.

Finally, I wiggled out of his arms and walked backwards towards my suite, making sure I was staying a good distance away from him as I did. He laughed. "Okay, Cricket. I'm done."

"I better hope so," I warned, siting back onto the red-velvet couch. He sat beside me, a goofy grin on his face. I glanced at him sideways and then crossed my arms, raising my chin in mock-annoyance.

I felt his hands reach over to me, trying to spread my arms apart, but I held still. I cast him another sideways glance while keeping my mouth set firmly in a straight line. He sighed and moved towards me, placing a tender kiss just above my jaw. It was short, but that was all I need. My eyes almost squeezed shut.

I turned to him, a pout of my face, as he smiled and kissed the same spot again.

"That's cheating," I said quietly as he moved his head back from me.

"Doesn't matter now," he pointed out. I tried not I grin.

He moved over so we were right next to each other, thighs touching, and I happily sighed as we both looked at each time. I was the one to close the space. I brought my hands up to his face, the pad of my thumb rubbing the side of his check fondly, and then met my lips to his. He smiled against me, and then deepened it, his lips so soft and intoxicating, my thoughts went blank. His hands found my hips again and he held them there, as mine played with his hair.

Suddenly, I found myself beneath him as he had pushed us back against the couch, the kiss becoming more and more desperate. All I could think about were his hands, now holding my sides, resting at the middle of my torso, the grip becoming inadvertently tighter and tighter, and I liked it. It didn't put butterflies in my stomach. His lips parted mine as he went to kiss my jawline, and my eyes squeezed shut as I held onto his neck. His kisses were quick, but so addicting, as he ran them up my jaw to my ear, and then back down again. Suddenly he was back at my lips, finishing what had been started, and I felt myself finally relax underneath his body.

There was a knock at the door.

We parted, and that smile that had been on his face before seemed to have never left.

"I'll get it," I breathed, and he pulled me up so I had my legs planted on both sides of his lap. He pecked my lips quickly before I got up.

I opened the door, getting my breath back, and was surprised to find the figure of Susan standing in front of me.

"Susan, how are you?" I asked curiously, but I instantly became worried as I watched her more. Her face was incredibly pale, and she held no expression at all as her mouth hung open slightly and her gaze was set loosely on me.

"Is Edmund here?" she said monotonously. I opened the door slightly, revealing him, sitting on the couch.

"He's right here," I said, gesturing towards him. She stepped closer so she was just inside the frame of the door.

Edmund turned his head and abruptly got up, seeing Susan at the door.

"Are you okay, Sue?" he inquired worriedly, standing next to me.

"Yeah. Can I just talk to you for a second... alone?" she said weakly, staring at the space in between us. I got the message.

I looked between the two of them and then backed away. "Yeah. You two talk. I'll be on the balcony."

I turned my back to them and stepped outside, giving them some space. Some muffled whispers entered my eardrums soon after, but I didn't bother to listen.

Susan looked sick, really sick. Maybe it was a virus, but she had been seeming down these last couple days, almost depressed. I couldn't help but think it had something to do with Prince Solomon, but I didn't have the courage to ask her. I rarely saw her, and we had finally got off the formalities boat. It's not that I didn't like her, it's just things didn't click with us like it did with Edmund and Lucy, even though Lucy told me she meant well. They all did, of course, but it had dawned on me these past couple days that if Ed and I decided to make things serious... how would we tell the rest of them? What would they think?

There were a terrible sound that came from inside, a sound I could only match to one thing. My instincts made me run.

Susan was buckled over a pile of her vomit on the floor, Edmund kneeling right beside her.

"I'm sorry, El. Do you have a bowl or something?" he said desperately. I ran to the bathroom, emptied out the washing bowl from yesterday, and ran back to the them.

Ed took it and gave it to Susan, who held it tightly against her stomach as Edmund stood her up. She looked up as sick as sick gets, and I couldn't help but feel sympathy for her as I helped Ed walk her out of my room.

"Where are we going to take her?" I asked Ed, looking at Susan's head dangle like she wasn't even conscious, the only sign that she was still with us being her feet slowly scuffling against the ornate rugged floor.

"Infirmary," he told me, and then looking up to see a group of maids rushing towards us. "I'm going to have to take her home."

* * *

_Dearest El, _

_I'm sorry about everything that's happened. I guess Solomon and Sue just weren't meant to be. I'm sure you'll have a splendid time in Archenland, with or without Ed, and it's only a couple more weeks. If anything else happens, do come back. I know it's an inconvenience for you to stay there while we are all here, but King Adonis would be so upset if all his guests left, and he is a lovely man. You'll be in Narnia for who knows how long, so to experience something different does have its benefits._

_I do miss you. It's been so long! Hopefully Ed managed to get you outside while you were there together. I would be so angry if you came back paler than before! What a sight that would be... but I'm only kidding. Susan's feeling a little better, but the doctors aren't sure what she came down with. They say it's a mixture of a virus and something inside her head, but no one is positive. I'm just glad she's home now, in our care._

_Edmund misses you. I can tell. He speaks very highly of you nowadays, what's that all about? I'm sure you could give me the full scoop..._

_Anyway, see you soon! I can't wait until you're back at the Cair. I'll be waiting!_

_Love, Lucy_

* * *

**Author's Note: Duh duh duh DUUH! Susan's sick and now Ed and El are ****separated for the first time EVER. We'll see how that goes...**

**I'm afraid that blasted thing called 'school' has started. *Passionate booing from the audience as well as me.* Oh well, I'm afraid to say with that, the updates we be less often. I'm always thinking, and writing, and thinking about writing, but it will take me longer to get it all together and edit. I'm terribly sorry, but I will try to update about once a week! Anyway, still do REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! Believe it or not, it is motivation and helps me get through the school week!**

**THANKS GOES TO: SweetSunnyRose for reviewing, BellaCordelia (that's such a pretty name, is it from something?) for following, A Fearless Knight's Fairytale for reviewing, and Alex Indigo by being AWESOME and following both the story as well as me, and reviewing and favoriting! WOOT WOOT! Thank you all so much!**


	18. Overlapping Paths

Part 2

_And she woke up in a cold sweat on the floor... next to a family portrait drawn when you were four._

The Middle East: Blood

Lucy

I remember the first time he looked at her, how it showed how at that moment they could do anything they wanted. At least, that's how I believed it to be. It was like his eyes streamed an open pathway in front of him, narrow margins presenting themselves towards her. And when her eyes met his, their paths overlapped, but didn't intertwine.

And then when I saw how he looked at her after the war, when peace came again, and when they had nothing to say… I saw the truth. But I didn't think it was my business to tell them what they already knew, even if it was dug so deep down within them and they couldn't bear to say it to each other after everything they had been through. They cared too much for each other to hurt each other, not realizing how saying nothing at all made it only worse.

_Caspian, this isn't going to work how we thought._

_I know, Sue, I know._

And now here I sat again, staring at my unconscious sister as she lay in her bed, distraught from all those feelings that had built up against the wall she had tried to hold up for herself. But the wall had crashed, and now she knew how she felt. I knew. That's why she was so distressed, and I wasn't going to make the same mistake like last time by keeping my mouth shut.

I held her hand firmly at her bed side, the letter I had sent to Eleanor yesterday seeming to be only a mild explanation of what was actually going on. Susan was not getting better, but she was not getting worse, and I know I should thank Aslan for that, but it wasn't enough.

Caspian couldn't even look at her. He rarely saw her and I've become very keen at observing so I could tell when he finally accepted the fact that they had been looking at it all wrong. He covered it all up, but there was a tension in the air now in the castle that wasn't there before as he sauntered through the halls, more aimless than I remember.

Susan stirred beside me, moving her head so it faced me, but her eyes stayed shut. I leaned closer to her. "Sue," I whispered, though I didn't expect anything less than an exhale; a sign that she was alive.

"Lucy," she mumbled, keeping her eyes shut as mine widened. "You can hear me? Are you feeling better? Do you want me to get you something?"

Her lips upturned into what I perceived to be a small smile. "No," she managed, drawing out a long and inconclusive breath. "Just stay here."

So I did, watching her lightly, wondering when her eyes would open. Her fingers squirmed in my grasp, so I released them, and she raised her hand in the air, twisting and rotating it in circles like it had been turned to stone and now she could move again.

She put her hand down. "Thanks, Lu."

I brought my gaze up to mouth, now set in a fixed line. "For what?" I asked.

As she turned her head back to the ceiling, her eyes opened slightly. I watched as they suddenly got used to the late afternoon sun rays streaming thought her curtains, glistening like a glass bottle under the light.

She set her eyes on me, and I exhaled as she spoke. "Just being here. You understand, and yet you have asked nothing except of my well-being. Thanks."

I suddenly felt like she had been reading my thoughts as I had held her hand and she seemed in a far-away place, only a few minutes before.

"I'm your sister, Sue," I answered, unsure of what else to say. "Of course I care about your well-being. Right now it's the most important. You have to get better again."

She rolled her eyes, but not in a way that was directed towards me. "I know," she murmured, and then curiously asked, "How is everyone else? How long have I been like this?"

"Peter is well… Peter," I answered, exasperatedly, for lack of a better word. She smiled slightly. "You and Edmund returned nearly a week ago, and he's the same as well, going straight back to work," I said. "Eleanor's still in Archenland. We haven't heard from her, yet."

"And Caspian?" she asked weakly, taking the strength from her. I exhaled again. "He's the same. He misses you. I think you both need closure."

"Closure?"

"Well, clearly avoiding the situation has not worked out."

She surprised me by turning to me, a grin plastered appropriately on her face. "I was in Archenand, and that's when I realized I needed space. I began to understand that right now, the men in my life," she began, eyes still fixed on me, "Or any men who come into my life, for that matter, cannot make me happy. I need family, especially with everything's that's happened. I need ties. I need tradition. I need familiarity. With Narnia and Aslan and the whole bit, I just can't deal with it all any other way. I would rather forget Narnia than have to live any other way. I need _you_, Lu. I need Peter, and Ed, and even Caspian, but as a brother, as a friend, someone who I can depend on. Sacrificing you all for some strange man who only wants me for my name would kill me."

I stared at her in bewilderment, letting her words wash over me as I returned her smile. "Well… I'm glad you figured it out," I said.

She turned back to the ceiling. "I wonder where Aslan is right now."

"Mmm?"

"I wonder where He is. I mean, what does He do when He's not around? Does He have a favorite pastime? What does He like to do?" she wondered, mostly to herself.

I cocked my head. "Where is this all coming from?"

Sighing, her tone turned dismal as she said, "I've been wondering about Eleanor and why she's here. Aslan has a reason, yet he doesn't show it. What could He be doing?"

"He does have the rest of the universe to attend to," I replied sardonically, watching her as she stared at the ceiling above her the way one stares at the stars in complete fascination. A question popped into my head.

"Well, now that we've got most of your problems sorted out," I began, causing her attention to revert back to me, "Could you tell me what's going on with Ed and El?"

She laughed quietly, propping herself up on one elbow before she spoke. "At first, I was worried they would end up like me and Caspian, but now I know it won't. We just didn't speak to each other, or have contact with each other. But with them, they got lucky."

"Lucky?" I said, a giggle pressing itself against my throat. Susan nodded.

"They're best friends, and even though I'm not sure they've admitting to each other how they feel, they show it. It's shy and fascinating at the same time. The way they just clicked was like that," she explained, snapping her fingers in the air.

"Ed would never admit something like that," I noted softly.

My sister raised her eyebrows, breathing out, "Maybe not to us. But to her, he would do anything. Give her the world, if he could."

I shook my head in confusion. "How do you know this if you're not even sure that they have said anything yet?"

"Maybe when you're older, Lu, you'll understand," she sat back into the bed, appearing much smaller than before. "But I think it's what happens between all the dates that counts the most."

I mimicked her emotions, resting my head in my hand as I thought. Is that what mattered more? How they showed even when they weren't together, they cared? I had absolutely no idea what to believe, so how could Ed have possibly managed to fall for-

Peter opened the door to Susan's room abruptly, approaching the bed as we both straightened up.

"You're awake," he breathed happily, looking at Susan. "How are you?"

"Getting there," she replied quietly. "What's got you in such a rush?"

"Oh, right," he grumbled, rubbing his hands over his face. "There's some people at the Cair."

Susan and I exchanged a look. "And?" I pressed on, craning my neck forward.

"They claim to know about Eleanor. They say they know who she is," he said. "But we don't know who they are... yet. It's just a man and a woman."

Susan asked him, "How did they find her?"

"They saw her at the latest ball," he answered, looking at my older sister. "They say they've been looking for her for a really long time."

"Did you ask them their names?" I questioned, standing up and wondering why he was taking so lightly to this. "When did they come in?"

"They requested to see me. All of us, really," he looked out the window. "I just got the word from Trumpkin. I though you should be there."

"So you haven't seen them yet?" Susan said, sitting up in bed.

"No, but some guards are taking them to my study right now," he clarified, growing impatient. "We should go now and try to figure this out."

I turned to Susan, who gave me a sympathetic look. "Go on, Lu," she said, sitting back against the huge, plush pillows on her bed. "I'll be fine."

I bit my lip, turning back to my brother. "Let's go," I said, following him out the door.

"Did you already tell Edmund?" I whispered to him in the hallway, now in ear shot of all the creatures working around us, wondering who knew and who didn't. There wasn't even anybody other than my siblings, Caspian, Evangeline, and Trumpkin who knew where El had actually come from, so I suspected even less knew about these visitors.

"Yes. I don't know how he took it, though," he replied, running a hand through his hair. "What's going on between Eleanor and him?"

I smirked, saying, "Nothing that I know of." It was an honest statement; I just didn't think it was right to tell him the whole truth.

He nodded, maybe detecting I wasn't saying something, but we both stayed quiet as we finally got to his study. Edmund and Caspian were already inside, waiting, and suddenly I realized how important this meeting was. These people could very well help us figure out why El came to Narnia in the first place.

I sat in a chair behind the large, wooden desk of Peter's study beside Edmund, casting him a sideways glance. He finally met my eyes. "What?" he asked, completely oblivious. I rolled my eyes, turning away from him, and I felt him straighten up slightly as the doors to Peter's study finally opened.

A man with incredibly dark hair, brown but almost black, was the first one to enter our line of vision, small lines of stubble on his face causing a shadow to cast over his lightly tanned and wrinkled skin. Like his hair, his eyes were so dark they could have blended right in with his pupils if you didn't look hard enough. Thin, circular glasses, a hue of gray, were perched at the top of nose.

The woman who followed him almost had the opposite features: blonde hair, green eyes, and incredibly fair skin. Her face was soft, regardless of the wrinkles on her forehead and around her eyes. She smiled slightly as she entered. They didn't have enough have of _her_ features on their own, but together, the resemblance was completely evident.

Edmund stiffened beside me, watching the two of them take a seat in front of them as Isoniphus and Orute shut the door slowly behind them.

Peter stood up, looking at the two of them. "Where should we begin?" he asked, looking to us.

The woman exhaled. "My name is Margo, your majesty. And this is my husband, James," she gestured towards the man next to her. I tried my hardest not to look at Edmund as I felt his eyes suddenly look down at the space between us, thinking exactly what I was.

"And what's your relation to Eleanor?" Peter continued. This time the man, James, answered.

"She's our daughter, sir," he said softly, looking up to my older brother. Peter's gaze turned solemn.

I released a shuddered breath. "That's not possible," I told them, looking up to meet Margo's eyes, shining sadly.

"It is quite possible," she rejoined calmly, pausing before each word and pronouncing each impeccably.

"But El told us you were dead," Edmund breathed beside me. James exhaled, an unsure glance passing between him and Margo. "What did she tell you?"

And then a silence came over us, a net, surrounding Edmund and me, trapping us both. We never told anyone what she had told us, it seeming not that important at the time. And regardless, she was our friend, and I wasn't about to go blab to everyone about her personal life, whether it was my duty or not. I cared for her.

My eyes met Margo's again, and this time the resemblance between just her and Eleanor was scary. _She _was Eleanor. The way their jaws pointed, the way their eyes crinkled when they smiled, the way they never really frowned, but instead held their mouth in a firm line and furrowed their eyebrows. Eleanor was she.

She saw me looking, sitting back in her chair and an expression passed over her face as if saying… _You see it. I know you can._

An uneven breath came out of me as I looked outside the window, wondering what Eleanor was doing and thinking right this moment.

"Are either one of you going to answer the question?" Peter implored, a sore tone rising from within him as both of us seemed reluctant to say anything. Finally, Edmund and I met eyes. Me, trying to tell him I couldn't find the words, and him, nodding his head and understanding that it wasn't my place to tell them.

He turned towards Margo and James, keeping wary of Peter, and took a deep breath before folding his hands inside themselves and leaning them on the desk. "Eleanor Jane Astley is sixteen years old..."

"There's your first fault," Margo interrupted, kindly but with a firm tone in her voice.

"Excuse me?" Edmund said. "Eleanor told me she was sixteen."

"When did she tell you that?" she asked him curiously. He sat back in his seat, answering, "When she first arrived here. Almost three months ago."

Margo looked at her husband, rolling her eyes. "Some things never change."

"Excuse me?" Caspian said, clearly befuddled like the rest of us as he sat beside me.

"Eleanor hates birthday's," James answered, meandering his head to the darker haired king as he said, "She's always been that way. She thinks they are completely peripheral. People should only be celebrated at the times that count; graduations, weddings, funerals...et cetera."

I looked at Edmund. "Did she ever tell you that?"

He shrugged and shook his head at the same time.

Margo exhaled, a look of reminisce on her face. "She believes they are merely an acknowledgement of one's existence..." looking down, laughing, and then looking back up again, "And there are better ways to do that. So whenever another year passed, we would take her to the zoo and not say a word about it. She was born on August 15, turning seventeen just last week."

I couldn't help but smile as Margo told her story, seeing Edmund do the same.

"Alright, then," he said, exhaling, getting ready to speak again. "Eleanor Jane Astley is _seventeen _years old. She was born in a small town on the coast of England, a town she does not remember the name of. Her whole family was very musical, all enjoying to sing and dance. James Senior, her father, and James Junior, her older brother, both played guitar. She played piano along with her mother, and her younger sister Sophia could play violin and trumpet. James Senior was a photographer," he said, looking at the very man, "So they used the extra camera rolls to take their own pictures. There was one of Eleanor and her mother from behind, she was about six, and they were playing piano."

He stopped for a moment, watching Margo as she peered to the side of the study and closed her eyes.

"Is that all?" Peter said irritably, shooting him a glare. Edmund turned to him, no longer reluctant, drawing out one word for him.

"No."

He continued.

"They had a dog named Lonnie, she told me Sophia named him because she liked the sound of it. He was a beautiful dog, she said. A golden retriever, if I remember right," Margo's hand went up to cover her mouth, but he didn't stop. "At the age of eleven Eleanor's family, except for her and her sister, disappeared in a fire that destroyed their entire home. Exactly five years ago. Sophia and Eleanor went to live in an orphanage in London after the fire. Only a few years after that, Sophia was sent away to live with a foster family so Eleanor gave her the box that contained the only possessions she had left, but kept the key to open it with her, so she would still have a piece of them but also so she would never have to look at it again."

Margo's head turned back to him, now a glassy shade of green. "Is that true?"

He nodded slowly.

"Continue," she said. So he did.

"Now she enjoys reading and dancing, though she could never admit it. And she's shy if you ask her, but she knows the truth," his gaze overlapped Margo's, "Her mother spent her whole life looking for a miracle, so that's what she did, too. Recently, she admitted to me that she doesn't know if she should keep looking because she's afraid that will ruin the surprise. But I think she's just scared she won't find one."

And then he exhaled, letting everything off his chest and more, and I observed the line between him and Margo in bewilderment. Peter crossed his arms.

"You didn't think any of that should be told to me? What did I tell you?" Peter nearly yelled, looking at the both of us. "And you too, Lucy. It didn't cross your minds that I should know exactly five years ago there was a fire… and exactly five years ago _we stayed._"

"Pete, she's our friend," Edmund roared back, glaring straight at him. "We weren't going to betray her like that. It happened and I'm sorry you found out this way. But let's get over it, okay? I think we should first and foremost find out why the parents of Eleanor, who first seemed to be dead, are certainly not anymore."

"Yes. How is that exactly?" Caspian interposed suddenly, switching gears and watching Eleanor's parents like they had suddenly betrayed us.

James looked at Margo, the glassiness of her eyes now washed away. "Could we see our daughter, please? Then maybe we could begin to explain. We don't want to tell this story twice."

"Hold on a moment. How do we even know you're her parents?" Ed seethed from beside me. "You've brought nothing to show us you are who you claim to be."

"Your sister sees it," Margo commented as she looked at me. I remained still. "But if we must prove ourselves…"

She drifted off, reaching into a dark satchel which hung off the side of the chair and pulled out a large rectangular box, lacquered white with golden roses along the top. One word stood out on the front of it, engraved in cursive just above a keyhole. _Eleanor._

"What's this?" I said. Margo pushed the box towards Edmund and me, gesturing towards it.

It was left unopened. "King Edmund should know out of all people," she said calmly, watching his arms as he moved to take the box and open it, pulling out the first thing he could get his hands on.

Out came a photograph of a young boy and girl, smiling the biggest smiles I have ever seen. They both had dark hair, from what I could tell in the black and white photo, and held dripping paint brushes in their hands. They stood in front of a wall; the words _LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL _sliding down it in messy paint strokes. Edmund held the two sides of the photo firmly, looking down at it. An unsuspected smile came onto his face.

"What's this?" I said, though much softer than last time, whispering it near Edmund's ear as I leaned over to get a better view of the picture.

"It's Eleanor and James," he murmured. Margo looked fondly at him.

"She told me about this," Edmund said and put the picture back into the box. He closed it and slid it across the desk back to Margo, who took it into her hands, placing back in the back lightly, still opened.

"So Sophia is here, too," he said. James nodded, turning to Peter as he spoke. "Our son and other daughter are at a small inn just outside of Cair Paravel. All that explaining will come soon enough. Where is Eleanor?"

I shot a concerned look to Peter, who took his hands off the edge of his desk and stood up tall as he spoke. "Eleanor's in Archenland. Originally, she was with Edmund and Susan for the summer, but Susan got sick so Ed had to bring her home. She's coming back next week."

Margo's eyes widened, standing abruptly to face my older brother. "She's alone?" she gasped. Peter gave her a confused look, probably guessing her concern only came from being a mother of someone who is on their own in a different country.

He stepped around the desk to speak to her. "She's okay, Margo. King Adonis is a fine man. She is not alone, really. There are plenty of people in Anvard to watch after her."

"Besides, she never wandered very far. I bet she's out on the balcony of her room right now, a book in her lap," Edmund said lightly, attempting to console her.

"You don't understand," Margo worried. "It's too dangerous for her to be out there alone."

"She's safe, Margo. Just like King Peter said," Caspian reassured, standing up.

Her head shook in frustration. "You need to send word to bring her back _now,_" she demanded. "Eleanor is not safe in this world. If anybody finds out who she is, they _will _kill her, King Peter. She needs to come back as soon as possible."

Peter's head crooked to look behind him, preparing to ask us what we think. Our unanimous looks of concern told him what we thought was the best thing to do, so he slowly turned back to Margo and James, telling them that he would do what he could. They were sent away with guards, planning to be brought back to the Cair by sundown with the rest of their children.

And as this plan was followed through the only person who was more anxious than Margo and James was Edmund, even though he wouldn't admit it to anyone, not even himself.

* * *

_Dearest Eleanor,_

_I don't know how to say this: but we have sent a carriage to bring you home right away. I'm sure it will arrive just as this letter comes, but I'm also sure you will want an explanation to come with it._

_The truth is I cannot tell you why we are bringing you back. I couldn't possibly begin to even try in a letter; it wouldn't be fair on your part. So I'm afraid you'll have to wait, but believe me, you have nothing to worry about._

_Susan has gotten better, believe it or not, which is actually fantastic because I have been missing her. We all have. I will still be waiting at the gates of the Cair for your premature arrival. See you soon._

_Love, Lu_

* * *

**Author's Note: Some of you may have noticed, but I changed it so 'Part 2' doesn't come until now as oppose to where it used to be at the beginning of Chapter 14. Also, I changed the song I used, feeling I should save 'Power Hungry Animals' for something else. **

**Music is one of my passions, and has been a huge influence on this story… so if you would like to know the songs I use while writing this you can PM me and I will send a list to you. :)**

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	19. The Man on the Platform

Peter

The tension in the castle was incredible after the Astley family arrived in waiting for Eleanor's return home. We had discussed it and until further notice their whereabouts were to be kept on the down-low, per Margo's request. The anticipation was getting to us all, but we had agreed on a plan to let the news to Eleanor easily without shocking her completely.

Sophia, who was a mirror image of her mother with her short, blonde hair had said, "She's going to be shocked as it is. I fear if we all come out at once, she won't know how to handle it."

She was quite intelligent for a 13 year old.

The first two days I hadn't seen any of them much, only Caspian and Lucy. Edmund often visited Susan, and although Lucy did too, she seemed to find some time for me as well. I tried to continue on with my normal duties as much as I could, we all did, but I couldn't help but think how much things were going to change around here.

Then as the Astley's grew more comfortable I saw them. But it was the kind of conversation you have with co-workers or colleagues, not the kind of people you would want to ally yourself with. And I'm sure one of the most surprising thing to come to Eleanor is the fact that she gained a sibling though this whole experience, but I'm not sure how she'll feel about that at all. Margo and James Sr. still didn't explain their story, but I've got this growing feeling in my stomach that the fire that occurred five years ago was more than just that.

Today was the day Eleanor was to arrive and I stood at the gates with Edmund, planning to get her inside as fast as possible.

"Nervous, are you?" I said, seeing him moving slightly on the balls of his feet.

"Of course I am. Eleanor's supposedly in danger. I'm not going to feel relieved until I can physical see her back with us," he answered, still on his toes.

"Whatever you say, Ed."

He head jerked towards me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Looking straight ahead, I said to him, "Nothing. You genuinely care about her. What's wrong with that?"

I tried not to sound demeaning, but I had to get my point across. "What's that about?" he asked irritably. "Do you have a problem with that?"

"Eleanor's got a lot of problems she's going to have to deal with, Ed," I said, turning to him. "I think it's the best idea to get too close to her."

His body stiffened. "What does it matter?"

My head directed itself back to the gate again, watching the horizon as the late afternoon sunset danced in front of us. A black dot appeared right before it. "I just think you shouldn't get any more involved than you have to."

I could feel his glare sweep over me. "All the more reason to help her."

"I would have to disagree. The last thing you need is a distraction."

He scoffed exasperatedly, setting his eyes on the black dot that grew bigger and bigger in front of us. "Pete, you don't get anything. Just drop whatever you're trying to lay onto me."

He defensiveness triggered my attention. "Is there something you're not telling me, Ed?"

He rolled his eyes. "No, Peter. Nothing," he snapped, now bitter. Watching as the black dot suddenly turning into a carriage, leading up to the pathway of the castle, he strolled down the steps towards it and away from me. The centaur at the gate, Iodinus, pushed it open in one swift move and then backed away from it just in time to get out of _The Just King's _way.

The carriage approached and pulled up to the side of the gate, an eager Edmund standing by its iron bars only a few feet away. Terros stepped around the carriage and opened the door, giving his hand the girl who had traveled in it. And when she came out, I watched Edmund. He shoulders and arms automatically released all their tension, like he had finally gotten home after waiting for a delayed train. She was tanner, and hair was longer and lighter, and her eyes were greener, and she smiled brighter than I remembered when she saw _him; _standing there reaching out content to bring her back to her new home. And while all these things were mere observations for me, I knew my younger brother had ideas and thoughts and stories running through his head that he didn't tell me. I knew he didn't always trust me, but even so I wasn't going to change my views. There was no compromise; we had to work with what we had.

I realized this as I watched him embrace her, his arms just above her hips. As they pulled away, her said something in her ear that made her laugh, throwing her head back in merriment. Those ideas and thoughts and stories flashed through his eyes again as he watched her, stealing a quick kiss from her cheek. She looked down, and suddenly their train had sped past me as I looked from the platform, completely missing the departure time.

They both turned to me, Eleanor first with a happy smile on her face, and approached.

"King Peter, it's nice to see you again," she said, walking up the steps. I nodded curtly at her. "Likewise, Eleanor. How was Archenland?"

"It was nice," she smiled. "King Adonis finally showed some interest in me once your lot left. Now what has brought me back?"

Edmund's mouth turned firm. "Let's just get you inside," I suggested, turning towards the archway and heading down to the library where everyone else currently waited anxiously. She complied, not saying anything, though I imagine her curiosity was getting the better of her. She and Edmund walked behind me as we walked down long halls which suddenly felt like were narrowing. I didn't look behind me to see them.

I opened the great doors to the library, Lucy right there to see me, and suddenly brought Eleanor into a huge hug, throwing her arms around her as she entered. Edmund chuckled, stepping next to me.

"El, I've missed you," Lucy said into her shoulder.

"I've missed you, too. Did I miss anything while I was gone?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary. It was so boring without you."

Eleanor squeezed her gently one more time and let her go. "You've gotten taller!"

"And you've gotten tanner!"

She laughed. "Thank your brother for that," she noted, gesturing towards him. Lucy returned her smile, and then Eleanor looked to us all.

"No more waiting," she said firmly, meeting my eyes. "Tell me what's going on."

I bit my lip and turned my head to the other side of the room.

Her eyes followed mine as they scanned over the room until they fell upon the figure of a 13 year old girl not so far away from us, waiting for her as she sat at a long, wooden table. As Sophia's eyes finally met hers, a huge intake of breath went into everybody. Sophia slowly got up from her seat, but neither one of them moved. Eleanor's arms were already dropped by her sides, and the beat of the room suddenly grew louder and louder as a fear began to dawn on me that maybe Eleanor didn't want to see her sister right here, right now.

That fear quickly left as Eleanor's body completely loosened, like she was a wave that had just crashed on the shore and was now pulling back again. She stepped passed Lucy, Edmund, and I, watching her sister who did not move from her spot.

A hand came up to her mouth and she looked away, squeezing her eyes shut just like her mother. "Soph," she breathed. "You're so tall."

The 13 year old smiled brightly at her, walking towards her as Eleanor's eyes turned back to her.

"I could have shrunk, too," she replied, causing Eleanor to laugh and pull her sister into a hug, rocking her back and forth slightly as we all watched in silence.

They parted, and Eleanor turned back to us. "Good call on your part, Lu. I would have lost my mind if I had known about this before."

Lucy smiled. "It gets better."

Eleanor's eyes widened, turning back down to the sister whom she held, and then her eyes set themselves on four figures who stood in a doorway across from the room, approaching them slowly as they came into view.

Margo smiled at her two daughters. "Hello, darling."

Eleanor's hands dropped from her sister, watching her mother and the three other figures intently, craning her neck. Her eyes grew larger and larger, like the room on her face wasn't enough for them as she stood in bewilderment. Her father and brothers stood beside Margo as they walked closer, each side their own party that seemed to have to compromise to join together, because one wouldn't budge.

That was Eleanor.

"_Hello, darling?_" she repeated breathlessly, her eyes now in a full glare on her mother. "You leave us... and that... that _address _is the best you've got?"

And then her mother's face grew solemn. It was our time to go.

I motioned my siblings and we all exited quietly. Margo had told me that reaction from daughter was completely acceptable. I didn't question it.

Lucy, Edmund, Caspian and I all stepped out into the hallway of the castle. Awkward at first, and then we all parted.

I wondered which one of us would get stuck telling Evangeline.

* * *

**Author's Note: Short chapter... I know. But I'm going to update soon... once 38 reviews becomes 40. ****I can't thank everybody enough for all the reviews last chapter... Anna the Viking XD, Alexa Indigo, SweetSunnyRose, thestargazer7, and Guest. Also big thanks to lairyfight who just started up with this... I'm sure you'll get this if/once you reach this chapter! I'd also like to thank miacullenvampirefan for following! I love you all!**

**So I realized now a lot of new characters are being added to the story... but for plot purpose I'm going to keep the POVs within the anarchy and Eleanor. Things really pick up and this point... in more ways than you expect! I hope to have the next chapter up by Sunday night EST... which I'm sure can happen. Just a heads up...**

**Anybody else up for the playlist?**


	20. Bound

Eleanor

I watched the others as they walked out of the room, one by one. I don't know if it was an extreme sense of relief or an extreme sense of disappointment I felt when Edmund didn't turn to look at me. I wanted to look into those big, brown eyes of his and somehow get a response of assurance, but I also wished he had never been here at all at the same time.

Relief.

The door shut, and I jerked my head back towards my mother. Rather than being confused, she looking curious, as if wondering what generated my fury.

"So you know," she said flatly, almost as if she expected it.

My jaw clenched.

She nodded slowly, turning back towards the others and saying to my father, "Can you take James and Jude outside for a moment? I need a time with them alone."

My father nodded, turning to the door they had entered in and disappearing through its frame.

"So it's true," I said bitterly, once they were gone. Margo shot me a look, almost one of _sympathy, _and I felt my head burn with frustration.

"Let me explain," she suggested, approaching Sophia and I. As she did, my arm instinctively went around Sophia's shoulder.

"Please do not take long," I snapped through gritted teeth, holding Sophia close to me. Margo leaned against the edge of the table.

"Why don't you tell me how you knew?" she began. I stayed still. "Just so we don't repeat anything."

I knew what she was doing. She was trying to get me to say it. How could I begin to string the words together if I refused to think about it?

"You shut it away," she breathed against the table, watching me stare at the floor. "I understand-"

"You know nothing," I seethed, looking at her straight in the eye. "You know what that did to us? To Soph? Thinking your family is dead and you have _nothing? _Nothing to look forward to? No future? We had nothing and we still have nothing. You being here may as well not make a difference."

She straightened up slightly at my words, appearing unmoved. "You don't say that because you mean it. You say it because you're mad."

"Of course I'm mad! You left us alone, for God's sake!" I screeched, loosening my grip on Sophia slightly.

Margo shook her head. "You've always been mad we were gone. But that's not it. I know what you're thinking. I need you to say it."

My eyes widened. "You _know _what I'm thinking?" I asked incredulously. How could she possibly think she's knows what I'm thinking? What I'm feeling? She was gone. If she expects me to welcome her with open arms after everything that's happened she's crazy. Absolutely crazy. Completely crazy.

"Just say it," she said smoothly, softening her face. Was she really trying at this again?

"I don't know what you're talking about!" I said, glaring at her. "I don't know what you want me to say! _Gee, mum, it's so good you're back now. Why don't we go play the piano and make sandwiches now that we're together again_-"

"You are blinded by fury," she said calmly. I craned my neck forward at her, dropping my arms at my sides.

"I am not blinded by it! Stop making up excuses! This whole thing is your fault and you know it... you always knew it! It was always _your _fault!"

My breath was ragged as I watched her, and then her face softened some more, like she had cracked me open and figured out all that I knew.

Shit.

I gasped for a second, my eyes widened and completely startled from what I said. I shouldn't have said it. I shouldn't have.

"I always knew..." she drifted off, straightening up. "You always knew."

I bit my lip.

"You always knew they were going to leave?" Sophia said suddenly, looking between the two of us. I shook my head. "I didn't say that. She twisted my words around."

"It is still true," Margo said plainly. "You knew we were going to leave. Looking back on the memories and remembering the last day before we left, you could feel it. You knew we were going to be gone. The world was coming to an end, right? And you were so mad at yourself for seeing your fault and not doing anything about it that it dug so deep within you and you needed out. You created a whole new mindset. They left because they were dead, but you knew the truth. You know it is my fault and my fault only so that is why you are so distraught. It is reeking from your blood and your bones and I can feel it because you are my daughter and I know who you are."

I shook my head again, but this time when my mouth opened no words came out. Suddenly, a memory of Edmund and I flashed before me.

_We were in free fall. Together, like we had fallen from the sky. I was smiling, and then I hit the water and the world I could see beyond the trees disappeared. We surfaced. _

_"That was incredible!" I said happily, still holding his hand. And he smiled. I never felt so free._

Sophia exhaled. "What happened?"

Now I was bound.

"They said you were in Archenland, Eleanor. How was that?" Margo questioned casually. I couldn't move.

My mind was blank, the memories going down into a pit and being locked away because now they actually meant something. I couldn't answer her question, or else the memories would get curious, pecking at the walls and making my insides turn out and my outsides cave in until I was nothing but skin and bones.

"It was fine," I said shakily, my hand grazing the bag that was slung over my shoulder at my side.

But she saw my movement, and moved closer to me.

There wasn't anything in it, was there? I can't remember... I can't... I can't... I can't...

She grabbed the bag as I backed away from her abruptly, but it was too late. Its contents spilled on the floor.

I instantly looked up, not even bothering to get them. I could see her pick at something curiously, and then a name flashed before me and I couldn't breath. I was held there. I was tied. I was bound.

She picked two objects up from the floor, two gifts King Adonis had graciously given me because I asked. Because I wanted to know. Now, I wish I had thrown them in the hearth of the fire that was lit in my suite because the nights were getting colder and colder and I could see my breath in the wind as I sat out on that balcony when the stars came out. I wish I had burned them until they were ash.

I looked over at Sophia, who watched Margo curiously but hesitantly, like she knew the room was about to explode. Like she knew one of us was about to explode.

Margo's breath hitched as she began to speak. I tried to block out her words. I tried.

"_Romeo and Juliet..._" she said, glazing her eyes over one of the books. "And _The Complete and Unfinished History of Winged Beings._"

My insides curved out.

_King Adonis had shown interest in me once the Pevensie's had left. I wasn't complaining but it was a little much. At first it was manageable, only a few visits for afternoon tea, but then as we grew closer and closer it became a constant thing. He had showed me the library and one day I was left alone for the first time since Edmund and Susan left so I went wandering. I read, and then my curiosity peaked so I climbed higher and higher up the ladder to more books and more stories. A name flashed before my eyes, and then it was gone._

_I looked back again._

Romeo and Juliet _was perched at the very top of the shelf, like it had been waiting for me. I carefully took it into both my hands and skimmed through its pages, the name of Margaret Jacobs written in the back of it, the name Margo had before she became a mother. _

_And then before I left, I asked to keep it. King Adonis happily let me do so, even giving me another before I departed._

"You found these in Archenland, am I correct? And that is how you finally figured it out?" Margo asked me.

I nodded steadily.

"And you dug it so deep down within you only a few minutes ago because you were afraid what you actually believed to be true was indeed true," she added.

I nodded, more reluctant this time.

"Can you tell me what's going?" Sophia said irritably, almost angry. "What's so special about these books?"

I turned my gaze to her, and suddenly I felt like she was older and I was younger. _Don't think. Just talk. Get them out. _

"You know they didn't die," I told her. She nodded, her completely brown eyes open in confusion. "They set fire to the house because they had to go. She had to get away from us because it was dangerous. And then somewhere along the line, Aslan sent them to Narnia to finish what had been started. And then me. And then you."

Margo's eyes were sad.

"And while we were all separated in this world, they journeyed to Archenland and hid that book in the library, in hopes that one of us would find it and we would figure it out," I said, adding, "And I did. And then they found you."

"But I don't understand..." Sophia drifted off, and then looked at Margo. "What had been started that had to be finished?"

Her eyes wandered to the next book, _The Complete and Unfinished History of Winged Beings. _

"Now one day you are going to tell this story to your children," Margo said, lifting the book and leaning on the edge of the table. "So listen closely."

She opened it, reading the first page aloud.

"_Of all Jadis' evil_ creatures," she said. "_The Winged Being were the most powerful. She had created them herself, by bargaining with a sorceress who refused to say her name. The creatures were humans, who could fly with wings as white as snow and then hide them again, an easy camouflage while the two Sons of Adam and two Daughters of Eve rose to take her crown. They were elusive creatures, so very few knew of them._"

My breath hitched.

"_These Winged Beings were sent to places like Calormen and Archenland to spy on the humans, understand what her enemies kind were like so she had more advantage over them when the time came. She learned they mourned the loss of others. She learned they would sacrifice for family. The Wingeds could camouflage and then fly back to Jadis to tell her their secrets. They could manipulate the thoughts of Narnian creatures to get them to turn to her side, but they never got close enough to the humans,_" she paused, breathing heavily. _"They had no power on the humans because they were completely pure. Completely whole. Eventually, they confessed their vulnerability to Jadis and she was furious. She threatened to kill, and so she did. One by one, turning them to dust. As she came to the last creature, a woman, Aslan approached and offered this Winged a chance to start over, a chance to be whole. The Winged took the offer and was sent away to another world. The reason Aslan chose to save her is unknown. Jadis continued the war without them, eventually dying on the battlefield to Aslan himself. In this book the accounts of all memories of Wingeds will be told, in hopes to discover why Aslan chose to save such an impure creature._"

And then she stopped, the room suddenly much smaller than it was before. All I could hear was my own breathing, watching my mother intently as she gingerly closed the book and set it on the table.

"You were that Winged," Sophia said, mesmerized. "You were that creature."

Margo nodded faintly. "Two weeks before we burned the house, Aslan came to me and told me Jadis had almost risen from the ice and was coming after us. I thought leaving and getting us apart would only keep her away," she laughed slightly, but not out of humor. "It didn't work."

"So she is back," I said defiantly.

"She is trying to rise, and there is ways she can return," Margo explained. "And now I am back, _you _are here, and once the rest of the creatures in this world figure out what is going on there will be war against us."

"Wait... hold on a moment," I said, approaching her. "What do I have to do with this?"

Margo cocked her head and exhaled heavily. "You are my first born daughter. The Winged's magic is in you, too."

"Can I turn into its form? Can you?"

She let out another heavy sigh. "I cannot anymore. I am too old. But you, you might be able to."

And that is the moment my outsides curved in and suddenly the world was a trillion other people against me. I felt like every moment I had ever lived I was being watched, like every moment wasn't even true humanity.

"So what-what do we have to do?" I managed, and then the most fateful answer came to her lips as she spoke.

"I do not know."

Sophia's head turned to me in worry, my whole head filling with questions. How were we supposed to stop Jadis from rising if we don't know where to look for her? How do we stop the uprising of the people who should be working with us? How will we prevent them from finding out?

My mother's eyes met mine. She couldn't help me answer any of these questions.

Why would Aslan ever want to save her, anyway?

* * *

I laid on the bed of my room, feet on my pillows as I looked up at the ceiling. The wind that whispered in from the open balcony door brushed my head, moving my hair slightly above me. I shifted my body towards the pillows so I could move my legs up the wall, stretching my feet back and forth against the creme colored wood.

It was dinnertime. Tonight's topic of conversation was me, and I didn't want to attend.

Right now at this moment, Margo was telling them all about what I am. They'll probably think I'm a freak. A traitor, even. I am the daughter of a creature who served a Winged, Jadis' own creature.

I don't know how she could bring herself to do it; tell them all she was. I know she wants to fix it but I've looked at her enough already and if she planned to dump all this on me than the least she could do is have a few answers.

There was a knock at my door, and then it opened slightly. Only one creature I knew would come into my room without even bothering to call my name.

"I don't want to talk, Evangeline," I called into the open air, keeping my eyes on my feet, pointing and flexing and pointing again.

I heard the door shut softly, footsteps creeping towards the bed. Eventually she came, and sat on the edge of my bed. I didn't speak a word.

"Alright, I'll talk then," she said finally.

I didn't move.

"You're mother couldn't have controlled what happened to-"

"Please do not call her that," I interrupted. My feet flexed.

She gave me a look full of scorn. "That is who she is."

"No mother would do that to her child," I argued, finally looking up at her. She ran a loving hand over my forehead and down my scalp.

"She had no choice, Eleanor. The first step towards fixing this is knowing it is not how she wanted it to be. She was made that way. Aslan gave her a chance. You could look at her with a sense of gratitude after all she's been through and all she's willing to do for you."

"It mustn't have been that bad," I said. "They managed to have another child after they left us."

"You should be happy, then," Evangeline said, taking a knot out of one of my pieces of hair. "He is Narnian-born."

I didn't bother to argue again. Maybe she was right, but it didn't feel right for me to believe it.

"Edmund must think I'm a freak," I murmured finally.

"Edmund Pevensie? Think you're a freak?" she said exasperatedly, stopping what she was doing with my hair. "Eleanor, he rules a land of talking animals and 'magical' creatures. If anything, it makes you more like us. What is so bad about that? I'm a dryad. Why should he care?"

"It's not all about what I am! It's what Margo's done and what I must do. And even Wingeds are freaks. They are the White Witch's creatures. Nobody knew about them and now I am the only one. What am I to do? Why would he ever want to talk to me?"

She looked at me fondly. "You are not her creature. You are Aslan-bound. He saved you. Now you get to save us."

"You say that as if I know what I'm going to do," I sigh. She spins my hair around her fingers again.

"Maybe not now, but you will figure it out," she said, placing the strand of hair beside my face. "It's in your nature."

* * *

**Author's Note: da da da DUNN! Eleanor's mother worked with Jadis? That changes things!**

**I was a bit hesitant about writing this chapter the way I did... if there is any confusion/mistakes/comments please let me know!**

**A HUGE THANK YOU GOES TO the reviewers: Hadam, Guest, Anna the Viking XD, SweetSunnyRose, and S.G. Hix, the favoriters: Hadam, Her Grace the Duchess, VeraWhite, and S.G. Hix, and the followers: Hadam, VeraWhite, and S.G. Hix. Thank you all so much! Your kind words and advice got me through the school week. **

**Anyway, I know things have changed a lot with this story so if there is anything that seems really extraneous (aka bad/mary sue-ish) please please PLEASE let me know! Thanks to all the readers!**

**-JK**


	21. I'll Take Care of You

Edmund

I stood in front of Eleanor's door, a tentative fist in mid-air as I prepared to knock. She hasn't made herself seen in these past couple days; most of the time in her room or walking about the castle. We still haven't talked since she returned from Archenland.

My hand was almost touching the door, and then it halted.

Would she want to see me?

If she had, she already would have. Maybe I should give her space, but what if she is just hoping I come to her? Maybe it's because she's embarrassed. Maybe it's because she can't bear to see me since I didn't bother to see her. Maybe she doesn't have the time. Maybe she doesn't think I actually care…

I knocked. There was no answer.

I knocked again, this time slightly louder to make sure if she was inside she could hear me. I brought my head closer to the door, hearing a shuffle from inside, but nobody came.

Slowly, I turned the knob of the door, unlocked, and opened it.

And there she lay on her bed, feet on her pillows and a book above her head. From where I stood in the door frame I could see her eyebrows were slightly furrowed like she was trying to concentrate on something really hard. I shut the door softly behind me.

"Did you not hear me? Or did you not bother to answer?" I asked, stepping up the dais towards her bed. She remained still, seeming stuck on the same paragraph as before, her dark hair in untamable swirls around her head.

I got closer to her, now standing next to the bed when I noticed she had no shoes on, her bare feet running up and down the headboard nonchalantly. I smiled, kicking my own shoes off beside it and flopping onto the bed, unsure whether or not that would make her react.

It didn't.

She finally flipped a page, but her brows were still furrowed.

"You're going to start getting wrinkles if you hold an expression like that for long," I noted calmly, looking up towards the ceiling. She released a small laugh.

"I'm reading German," she said simply, some of the tension in her face being released.

"No, you're not," I replied, viewing the title of _Romeo and Juliet _peek out between her small fingers. "If you have never read Old English before, it will be like reading another language, I suppose. Would you like any help?"

"I'm alright," she breathed, flipping another page. I looked away from her and continued to stare at the ceiling.

We stayed like this for many minutes, maybe an hour, I don't know, but it was comforting to know she wasn't mad at me. I think at this point, I had to let her come to me.

Although, I had to tell her that what's happened to her, _what she is, _does not matter to me. And even with the impending war at our hands, I will stand by her. I was in too far deep to go back, sinking to the deepest oceans I had never explored before and wondering what new things I will come across.

I turned my head to her, her expression just the same as before. She may have told me she was an open book but she isn't as easily read as she thinks she is, I realized. Here I lay next to her, an extemporaneous act, and couldn't get another word to come up from my throat.

After a moment of staring, she put the book down beside her and let out a heavy breath.

"Deny thy father and refuse thy name; or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I'll no longer be a Capulet," she murmured, looking nowhere in particular. I sat up and leaned on my elbow so I could face her.

"Romeo, doff thy name, and for that name which is no part of thee. Take all myself," she recited, finally meeting her eyes to mine, green and brown and rich like I remembered.

"I take thee at thy word. Call me but love, and I'll be new baptized; henceforth I never will be Romeo," I replied, causing her to smile.

"_Doff_ thy name," she repeated melodramatically. I brought myself closer to her.

"What a terrible time to live," she mumbled. My smile faltered.

"It will be alright-"

"I don't mean now," she answered quickly, pulling my hand up from my side and intertwining her fingers in mine. "I mean during the Middle Ages and the Renaissance."

"Oh. Do you want to talk about now?" I questioned hesitantly.

She sighed. "I have decided to think only about what is right in front of me. And right now, I need space from the rest of them. There is nothing more I can do, and judging by right here, right now, it seems to be a pretty good time to live."

She grinned slightly at the last bit, and I carefully drew myself closer to her so I could peck her cheek quickly, but then she placed either hand on each side of my face and brought my lips to hers.

"As that vast shore wash'd with the farthest sea, I would adventure for such merchandise," I recited after she separated from me.

"You're such a goof," she laughed, allowing me to lie on my back, crossing her elbows and laying her head in them on my torso. "What do know about the Middle Ages?"

I looked at her quizzically. "Why do you want to know that?"

"I'm just curious," she paused, looking up to me. "I want to be assured things could be far worse."

"Well you should already know they could," I told her, rubbing my hand up and down her back in a very loose pattern. "But just to give you a little idea, the Middle Ages are also known as the 'Dark Ages'."

"How dramatic," she mused.

"Yes, it was absolutely lovely," I said sardonically. "People were living with animals. There was no real sense of government. Personal hygiene was on nobody's mind."

"Lovely," she drawled, nodding slightly.

"There was also the Bubonic Plague," I added, receiving a horrified face from here. "I told you it could be worse."

"You're completely right," she said, laying her head on my chest. My hand remained still, now lying at her lower back.

She drew lazy circles on my chest with her fingers and for a few moments we held very still. One of my arms was placed firmly as it held her at her back, and then she brought the other which had laid by my side to her as she pressed our palms together.

"And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss," she breathed against my neck, causing an electric charge to run through my body.

"Are you trying to seduce me in Old English?" I asked curiously, half-joking. Her head leaned upward so we both could see each other's eyes.

"Ay, pilgrim," she said smiling, like she knew she was doing something wrong. I laughed and then said, "I'm not going to say it, if that's what you want."

"Say what?" she asked innocently. I moved my head down towards hers and kissed the top of it.

"The next line," I answered. "I'm not doing it."

"But you kiss by the book," she replied sweetly, causing a chuckle to break from my lips.

"That's nice of you to say," I replied shortly, looking back to the ceiling. She kissed the spot on my jaw that was open to her and then propped herself up on her elbow. Our eyes met, a million different moments passing between us. I couldn't help but smile.

"What?" she said, cocking her head slightly.

"Nothing," I answered, running my hand over the top of her head and down her neck. "Just give me my sin again."

Regardless of the fact that she rolled her eyes, she leaned down to bring her warm lips to mine.

**(Semi-suggestive stuff up ahead, if that makes you squirmy, skip over to the second section!)**

Her hand came up as she ran it through my hair, a gentle gesture as I ran my hands up and down her back. Her other hand was placed at my hip, and while she kept it there still and I knew she would keep it there, it did tantalizing things to my body. Our mouths curved into each other, and suddenly my hands were creeping lower and lower down her sides, leaving them at her hips. I didn't want to do anything she wasn't comfortable with, yet all the same time I felt I might explode if I didn't.

I decided to hold my control and leave it there, her hands finding my neck and stroking it lovingly. My grip on her sides became firmer slightly, fighting my hands as they were getting a mind of their own.

"Goose," she said softly, parting from me. "You- you can touch me. It's okay."

She was completely content as she looked into my eyes, giving away a part of herself. My hand ran over her cheek and her jaw as I realized something. She trusted me.

"You sure?" I asked hesitantly, feeling her soft hands run down my neck and onto my chest.

She pecked my lips again, smiling slightly. "Of course I am."

We held there for a moment, and then I brought my lips up to hers and tried to collect myself. This only seemed like a vain effort because once her hands found my neck again I couldn't help but think about my own.

She brought one of her legs over to the other side of my torso so she lay on top of me, holding my neck and stoking the sides of it with her fingers. A new feeling rushed over me, my hands running down her spine and then stopping right before her bum. She parted her lips from mine, kissing my jaw and then back to my lips again. My hands then ran down over her bum and down her thighs and her calves, finally reaching the skirt of her dress. Suddenly they were running underneath the dress and onto her bare legs, the skin soft against my fingers.

A noise hid itself in her throat, sounding almost like a suppressed moan, so I knew she was okay with what I was doing. My hands went up farther and farther until they held her thighs. It was then I realized her hands were gripping my side very hard. She was nervous.

Parting my lips from hers, I said between shaky breaths, "Are you okay? Are you sure?"

She nodded fervently, but I waited a moment to make sure she was positive.

She nodded again.

I proceeded to hold my hands at her bare thighs and kiss her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, her jaw, her neck, and anywhere else I could get to assure her that she could completely trust me.

After another minute, one of my hands slipped under the waist-band of her underwear and instantly she parted my lips in a quiet gasp and held her arms around my neck. I held her close to me with my other arm and kissed her neck, a subtle moan suddenly erupting from her and kissing the same spot again.

"It's okay," I whispered into her neck, seeing her trying to hold back. "Let go. I'll take care of you."

"Ed," she said into a moan, her eyes shut tightly as she held the back of my neck and brought her head into my shoulder.

A deep sigh escaped her, my roaming hand under her dress allowing her to forget about herself and everything else that may or may not happen.

"I'll take care of you," I said again. She pulled me closer, her hands running up and down my sides which did things to me on their own even if she didn't realize it.

And then a few minutes later both my hands were back at her hips, El and I very still as we held our mouths only a few inches apart, breathing in each other's air.

"I know," she said, barely above a whisper. Her voice was shaking. "I know."

I smiled slightly at her, kissing her lips one last time and then pulling her down to me, allowing her to rest her body on my chest as our legs were intertwined. Not a word was said between us. Nothing had to be. The skies had become clearer and both knew even if the world was completely against us, we were safe here. This was our haven. This was the place where we could let go.

* * *

As per usual, dinner was filled with light-hearted conversation that shielded us from the prolonging factor that a war was coming and there was next to nothing we could do about it. Margo sat diagonally across from me, next to her husband, and as she looked at the empty seat next to me that was open to Eleanor at every meal I realized that if El and I were to continue our relationship, I would have to tell them all eventually.

There didn't seem to be another option.

"Ed, have you talked to her at all since they got back?" a voice whispered beside me.

It was Peter. "Who?" I asked, turning to my older brother who held his head slightly lower than it was before.

"Who do you think?" he said exasperatedly. "I haven't. But that's because I know it's not my place. You can. Have you talked to her?"

I could have laughed. "Yes, Pete. I have talked to her."

"And?"

I exhaled, taking a drink from the goblet in front of me. "She said she just needs space. We all know there is nothing we can do, as does she. I just think she can't bear to look at her family right now," I moved my head towards Sophia and James, both telling a story to Susan with great passion; laughing. "Imagine how you would feel, Pete. All your life you think we're gone and suddenly we're back, but we had the choice. Imagine that."

"There may not be anything we can do right now," he said. "But that's because she hasn't tried anything yet. Narnian-lives are on the line, Ed. We can only put this off for so long."

I was about to retort his statement, a dozen different arguments forming in my head, when the doors of the dining hall opened and a girl with dark hair and a very defiant allure waltzed in.

Eleanor sat beside me, not a word said, and took her napkin from the table and set it on her lap. She proceeded to eat what was on the plate, her eyes set on the table like she was afraid all of us would be staring at her when she looked up.

Which we were.

"Eleanor, you haven't been formally introduced to Jude," Margo said sweetly, trying to diffuse the tension that overtook us all in the following minute she had arrived.

She looked up to her mother and returned a dangerously fake smile. "Okay."

The youngest brother, Jude, who was a mutt like Eleanor in the way that he didn't look distinctly like either one of his parents, put out his hand like he was older than all of us.

"I'm Jude," he said, revealing a smile with a tooth missing in the bottom. "I'm four."

"Is that so?" Eleanor said, putting her hand out and shaking his lightly across the table. "I though you were much older."

Jude sat back, smiling at Eleanor's comment, and then once her hand had escaped his it retreating to underneath the table where it had before. Except this time, it gripped my left kneecap. I looked to her face, completely unmoved, and then felt her hand against my leg. If she had not put it there, I would not have known how nervous she actually was.

Without looking at her, I reached my hand over to hers and pulled it from my knee and held it. Our fingers intertwined.

She held it tightly and continued eating.

"El, did you show your friends here how you can play piano?" her older brother, James, said, obviously trying to eliminate the tension some more.

"I did," she said, smiling slightly. "And I told them about the dancing, too, so don't try asking about that either."

He smiled back. "I won't."

And then the air loosened slightly.

"Hold on a moment," Lucy suddenly said from the other side of the table. "You tell us all that, El, and yet you still think it's irrelevant to tell us when your birthday is?"

Eleanor dropped her fork, but relief came to me as a silent laugh came over her. Her mouth hung open like she was going to say something, but she couldn't get the words out.

I don't know if it was the unfortunate predicament we found ourselves in where we all needed a laugh, but we did anyway. Even Caspian smiled slightly.

"Birthday's are completely beside the point, Lu," Eleanor finally replied, letting go off my hand to act out her next words. "Like, here's a gift. Congratulations on your existence."

Susan took the opportunity to chime in, "Yes, congratulations by the way. You're now _seventeen_. That's exciting, right?"

"I'm sure she'll think not," Sophia noted.

"Okay, let's get the conversation off me. Please," her older sister asked of us. "It's getting uncomfortable."

"Fantastic. It's working," James said sarcastically, causing a short laugh to erupt from his younger sister.

"I am surrounded by lunatics," El murmured beside me, grabbing my hand again. I smiled slightly, and looked up to see Lucy looking between us.

I furrowed my brows, hoping she couldn't see over the table from where our intertwined fingers clasped each other.

"What?" I asked her curiously. She nodded her head slightly and looked away from me.

"Lunatics," Lucy repeated. "All of us."

* * *

**Author's Note: I did plan to have a third section to this chapter but it's Sunday night and I have no more energy and school starts again tomorrow and blehh... You know what I mean.**

**I made the terrible mistake of watching 'Now is Good' yesterday evening. I'm afraid some of my writing time got substituted with me crying over a movie and reevaluating every life decision I've ever made. You can imagine by disappointment when I go through all that and still get no closure whatsoever. :/ I think I'm going to have to go out and buy the book...**

**I literally cannot thank all the lovely people enough who recently reviewed/favorited/followed/PMed/supported my story: Rach1998, sarahmichellegellarfan1, Hadam, SweetSunnyRose, mimikry, hotcandy101, Anna the Viking XD, gpgrace99, Alexa Indigo, Dei-Chan13, TheLonelyDancer, and the two anons "Guest". I'd specifically like to thank the second one for telling me that the Narnians only used talking horses when at war. I plan to go back and edit that so thank you!**

**^^Those people helped me get through the school week. Thank ya so much. **

**Also, just discovered the Divergent trilogy (March 14, come faster!) Anyway, if you're looking for a good action-heavy set of novels, that's it! I read the first two in just under three weeks, and I'm on my toes for October to come so I can read the last one and then be on my toes for the movie to come out next year!**

**Just a thought. I'm ranting, sorry, it's been a busy week. See you next Sunday!**

**-JK**


	22. Old and New Things

Lucy

Preparations for Edmund's 18th birthday celebration were in effect, regardless of the new discovery of Eleanor's thoughts on the matter which made the occasion a little ironic in one way or another. Guests from all over were to join the three night festival which would bring us into the initial days of autumn. I could already smell it in the air; it was becoming crispy and fresher than the humid summer days. The castle, as of today, was a madhouse due to the fact that the festivities were to beginning this evening, guests already arriving at the gates of the Cair.

It was hard to balance my royal, political life with the one I now shared with Eleanor and her family. The celebrations were almost called off due to the inconclusive war but Peter, like I, saw how it would give all our countries a chance to unite and celebrate. Maybe that would affect their decision to turn on us if it did get to that point in the coming future.

I had spoken to Eleanor numerous times since her family has arrived, mostly in her room, I might add. One time, my curiosity got the better of me and I asked her if she ever imagined what flying would be like.

"I don't know if I would be too scared to get off the ground," is what she had said, "Or I would feel so free I would never come back down. I almost feel now I am bound to this life which I never asked for, and I know I should be grateful my family is back. It just-," she paused, looking at me, "It just almost feels like a mixture of a dream and a nightmare whereas one day I'll wake up and suddenly I'm back in London. I don't know any other way to cope other than what I'm doing right now."

"Which is?" I asked her.

"Not getting too close to them or pretending like I forgive her," she answered softly. "I feel like the moment I do is the moment I'll have to let them go again."

* * *

"Queen Lucy!" a woman called from behind me. I turned to see Helena holding up two very similarly colored tapestries. "Which one?" she inquired, holding them both up.

"The one on the left," I said, pretending to be more mindful than I actually was. She nodded curtly, satisfied, and then turning on her heel to return back to the dining hall.

I was headed towards the gardens for a little private celebration of our own before the big party was to begin. Susan, Peter, and Caspian were already inside when I entered, all sitting in the hearth of the stone-floored entrance.

"Finally, Lu," Susan said, setting her eyes on me. She had gotten extremely better since Eleanor has returned, though some sleep still showed in the corners of her eyes. I sat next to her on the wooden bench. "You know we really don't have all day."

"Sorry," I said sheepishly, looking over to Edmund. "Big day, huh?"

"More of a disappointment for you," he answered. "You're the only one left."

"The only what?" I asked curiously.

"The only child."

I rolled my eyes. "As if you aren't all children. I swear sometimes I feel like the mother."

"It's in rotation. Peter was the mother last week," Caspian smiled, making us all laugh.

After a moment, Susan said, "Then who's it now?"

"Me," I said. "Because now I'm the only one left, and I'm the mother that must make sure you all remain children."

She smiled at me. "That kind of contradicts itself, but we can go with it."

I smiled back at her and we continued to watch Edmund as he opened a few small gifts from each of us: books, a pair of boots, a new handle for his sword, among other things. It remained difficult each year to think of something better for gifts that we actually needed and wanted, some years were more meaningful than others. All the while though, Edmund took the gifts graciously and thanked us all. It only took a few minutes. I suppose this part of our lives wasn't that much important anymore; I don't think any one of us minded.

"So Eleanor didn't get you anything," Peter noted afterword. I laughed.

"Pete, even if she had money, I wouldn't let her," Ed replied. "I'd try to get you all out of giving me gifts from now on but I know that won't happen so I may as well go with it."

"But I spent so much time on that book," Caspian said sarcastically. "Surely it is nothing like the other thousand we have in the library."

Edmund shook his head, looking down. "Oh, shut it. I shouldn't have said anything."

"But he does have a point. Let's just give it up," Susan added. We all looked at each other.

"Well, all right," Edmund said, looking at all of us in disbelief. "If only you have managed to come to that agreement _yesterday_."

"We did it just to piss you off, Ed," I said, trying to sound serious. He blinked at me for a second, but then I cracked a smile.

"We should probably get ready," Susan told us, standing up. "All the guests are going to arrive soon so we should go to greet them."

I stood up as well and we all began walking back inside. "Have you seen Eleanor or her family?" I asked suddenly, look at them all. They shook their heads.

"Library?" Edmund suggested.

"Let's go find out," I said, and together we both parted from the other three and went down to find her.

The library was vacant, but music was echoing through the halls of the front of the castle so we followed it until we found they fairly empty dining room.

It was at that moment, stepping into the dining hall with my older brother, that I was glad I went looking.

James and his two sons had taken over the instruments as of right now, bringing a 1940's style swing back into the air as they played. Eleanor was off to the side, and even she couldn't help but smile as she sat at an empty circular table with Sophia.

When they ended, her father put his trumpet down and I approached him. "You have to play tonight, Mr. Astley."

"Excuse me?"

"At the festival," I explained. "It would be fantastic. Everyone would love it. It's different to them. Lively."

He stared at me for a moment and then looked over at Eleanor who now stood up.

"I'm not asking you to play, El. Just him and whoever else wants to," I assured her. "Narnia needs something like this right now and I think you do, too."

I looked between the two of them and smiled when Eleanor nodded reluctantly, stepping back from her father and I to talk to Edmund.

Eleanor's brother, James, stepped down from the platform where all the instruments remained. "Does anyone in Narnia know how to swing dance, Queen Lucy?"

"I'm afraid not," I said. His face turned crestfallen.

He looked over at Eleanor in the doorframe with my brother. "I'll just have to talk her into it, that's all."

* * *

Like usual, the guests arrived like how the sun rose in the morning; nobody noticed it until it was finally in the position of high noon. The castle was packed and bubbling with excitement, myself, Peter, Susan, and Caspian announcing the start of the festival.

And then Edmund came outside and the party had officially begun, most guests remaining in the court yard while the music played and it was still sunny enough to be outside.

"Dad's going to play soon," I heard Sophia say beside me to her older sister. Eleanor presented a face that held little interest, managing a smile, dropping it immediately once her sister turned to me.

"You know, Lucy, swing dancing isn't that hard. My father taught James and Eleanor in less than five days," she told me as we sat at one of the circular tables outside together.

"Four," Eleanor said suddenly. We both looked at her.

"What?" I asked, smiling slightly.

"Four days," Eleanor replied, looking over at the dancers who currently stood in play to a traditional Narnian tune. "It took us less than four days."

Sophia's mouth twitched. "Well it will only be easier, then."

Eleanor smiled, and the two sisters immersed themselves in their own conversation so I stood up and found Peter just inside the dining hall.

"Where have you been?" he asked me as I approached him. "I seemed to have lost everyone tonight."

"Just outside with Eleanor."

"I heard her father's going to play," he noted, looking out at the dancers.

"I asked him to."

"Is that really the best idea?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" I questioned, a bit defensive.

He exhaled. "Lu, we are trying to not break out the fact the Eleanor is different. I know this isn't _it, _but once people start asking it will only take time."

I clicked my tongue, looking away from him. Maybe it wasn't the best idea, but I knew something good had to come out of it because no matter how much Eleanor denied herself, she deserved this one distraction from the life she had been thrown in to.

Unable to think of anything that reinforced my argument, I changed the subject.

"I'm surprised you're not dancing with anyone," I told him. "Normally you have Lady Catherine or the Duke of Archenland's daughter on your arm."

He released a short laugh. "Since when were my affairs with Lady Catherine on your radar?"

I opened my mouth slightly in mirth. "So, it is she you prefer," I said, mostly to myself, looking forward. "That's good to know."

"You're always one to notice those things, Lu," he said, a smile still present on his face. I watched him, and he didn't say anything else, when a though suddenly crossed my mind.

I looked around the dining hall, a sea of happy, bubbly creatures socializing with one another.

"This is Edmund's party," I began. "Have you seen anything of our brother in the past hour?"

"No," he said, adding, "though that's not out of the ordinary. With Edmund I feel as though he disappears, going from place to place, and only at the very end do you find him again."

I glazed over the crowd again. "Oh, but I've found him."

I felt as though sometimes I was trying to put together a puzzle at these parties. For I was too young to bring any interest to any of the soldiers so I often spent time finding the people I knew, putting them into place, and then losing them again. Edmund stood at the very edge of the beverage table, talking with the Duke of Archenland, glass of wine ever-present in his hand.

"Oh, the irony of this all," Peter murmured beside me, stepping forward and given me a very melodramatic bow as he held out his hand.

"Will you care to dance, Queen Lucy?" he drawled, causing me thrown my head back slightly in laughter.

"Oh course, my lord," I replied, taking his hand and stepping out into the middle of the room.

We flowed right into the center, the other dancers finding a spot for us effortlessly, and began dancing. I never have been one to have great rhythm, but Narnian tunes were part of my blood and bones now so I could have done it just as well with my feet tied together.

Everyone who wasn't dancing around us were clapping and cheering to the beat, the vibe of glee being sent from every living thing inside the Cair.

"Remember when we first came to Narnia," Peter said to me as we turned, "And you couldn't even dance because you'd always step on our toes."

I laughed. "It only took a thousand years to get the hang of it," I replied wittily. He laughed, twirling me around one more time before the song ended.

"I must bid you farewell, my lady," he bowed, taking my hand and bringing me to the edge of the dance floor. "I have other women to woo."

I whacked his arm slightly. "Stop flattering yourself," I said, knowing it was my job to keep him grounded, even if he was joking. "Hubris doesn't suit you."

He laughed it off, officially bidding me farewell, and so I was left alone again. Only for a brief second, however, as Lady Catherine had coincidentally found my attention and instantly immersed herself in a conversation with me. Talking to Lady Catherine was easy; I'm almost positive she could talk a brick wall if she really wanted to, so even in moments where awkward silence was ensued, she found the words to fill it. Not that I complained, she was a lovely person, though I felt as though I were a melting pot as all her words came at me at once and my intellectual ability was dropped to zero. I only had time to say short, almost in cohesive words in between the large monologue I currently found listening into. It was about the ride over, and how they had almost been unable to come due to the conditional weather, but something caught my eye just behind her that brought her conversation to only white noise in my ears.

Ed, Eleanor, and James had been talking together, I had noticed that. But then Margo came over and began talking to them too, and what caught my eye was El's hand instantly found Ed's when she approached them, now hidden behind his back, like he was the last support that kept her standing and Margo's wave of nostalgia was pushing her over. Edmund ran the pad of his thumb over the inside of her palm thoughtfully as they began talking, but soon the waves settled and their hands hung loosely connected together.

Margo was saying something and they were all laughing, but then she and James went outside, leaving Edmund and Eleanor alone. Even after they left, their hands remained together, and then my mouth upturned into a smile.

I excused myself from Lady Catherine, who happily obliged and went to find her next recorder, and crossed the pathway to Edmund and Eleanor.

"You know, anyone could see you right now," I said casually, approaching them. Eleanor's hand subtly dropped to her side, but I raised my eyebrow at the motion as her eyes met mine.

She pursed her lips together in defeat, smiling slightly at me. "Lucy, you can't say anything to anyone about this, all right?"

"You told her?" Edmund asked, looking between us. "I was hoping maybe we could have had better timing."

"No, I just figured it out, Ed," I told him, still smiling. "When did it happen?"

They both looked at each other, no words coming, like they couldn't pinpoint exactly when.

"Excellent," I said, nodding my head. "You know each other's birthdays, at least."

Eleanor laughed, Edmund smiling slightly and saying, "When should we tell the others?"

My eyes widened. "You're planning to tell them?"

Ed gave me a confused look. "We can't really keep it a secret, Lu-"

"I know, that, Ed," I told him. "But won't they all think it's pretty bad timing, especially with everything that's happened? Perhaps you should wait it out a bit."

The idea crossed my mind, it didn't seem any time would be good to tell, and we haven't really had a chance to get to know the Astley family. Eleanor was still their daughter, regardless, but now just didn't seem right.

It also crossed my mind that, thinking it terms of what could happen in the future, this was the best time to tell them.

"Never mind, forget I said that," I said suddenly, looking between the two of them. "If you're trying to get the most approval from them, act quickly."

They both nodded, and then a familiar tune from the courtyard began playing. Eleanor's head instantly turned to see its players.

"Oh, no," she murmured, looking outside like the world was a glass bottle and somebody had set it at the end of a table, completely vulnerable to shattering as nothing could be done to change it.

* * *

**Author's Note: I first have to thank all the readers who have been patient with me. I'm so sorry I couldn't update last week! School's been a real pain...**

**I know I have a lot of people to thank for the reviews, alerts, and favorites but my email decided to send all my fanfiction things to spam so I didn't see any of it. I will have a big thank you for you all next week! **

**Again, thank you thank you thank you for being patient. Reviews do motivate me and I promise to get back into the normal schedule.**

**-JK**


	23. Hopes and Fears

Eleanor

_His_ music was playing. I could only vaguely hear it, but it rumbled though my blood and all my nerves instantly went on edge. My stomach dropped, giving the illusion that a pit had formed inside it.

It kept playing.

I almost felt like it would stop, sensing how uncomfortable it made me, but it played.

I stepped back slightly so my arm was touching Ed's.

"What?" Lucy asked me curiously, looking between me and the open archway to the courtyard just in front of us.

"Nothing," I said, and suddenly it was like a whole new person had come into my body, myself stepping out of it and seeing what the rest of the world saw. The only thing I could do was be aware of what was happening to me and not be able to act on any of it.

The music got louder, so finally Edmund and Lucy could hear it. Lucy smiled, instantly stepping towards the courtyard and disappearing in the crowd of people.

I saw outside of myself and I didn't like what I saw. The body that had possessed me moved toward the courtyard, slowly but forward, with Edmund right behind me, his hand trailing at my lower back.

Once I stepped outside, my world went back to my own and I didn't want to be here, surrounded by this- by this dome of memories pressing down on me like a hand.

I turned away and began walking back inside, Edmund looking at me in wonder.

"El?" he said, but I didn't answer him. I just kept walking. I kept walking until I was outside the dining hall, down the main hallway, back passed the library, and up another flight of stairs. I kept walking. I didn't look back. I physically couldn't. It made my body ache like a sore muscle.

And then I reached the gardens and I stopped walking.

I simply sat on the bench just inside the entrance, back leaned up against the cold, stone wall.

The memories were waves of water in front of the dam that had formed inside my head, some threatening to crash over and break all the walls that had held up so tightly up until these past few months.

"Stop," I accidentally said aloud, the word sounding sour as it fell off my tongue. I stood up, approaching the stone barrier that held me from the open air. This sensation whirled through me, like a self-motivator, and I began to wonder what it truly would feel like flying.

I outstretched my hands, wondering what the world looked like from the other side.

I stepped outside myself again, looking from the sky and down at my small form. My first thought was in awe. How could someone stay bound like that?

My hands pressed on the stone barrier, threatening to push me up any moment so I could see if I could fly, but I was interrupted.

"El?" a hesitant voice said from behind me. It was Edmund, but I didn't turn around.

My hands moved down to my sides as I stood stuck inside the barriers of the castle.

"It was a little crowded in there," I told him, looking down and fumbling with my hands.

He came up beside me and placed one of his arms around my waist, looking out onto the world. I leaned my head into his shoulder. I sensed that he was concerned but I didn't want to say anything.

"Would you have really jumped?" he whispered after a moment, as if the words would push me over on their own.

I thought about it for a moment.

"Probably not," I admitted, giving him a weak smile. "I'd like to think I'm brave or courageous or something like that and I would just have done it, but I don't think I would have."

He sighed beside me and pulled me closer, guilt sweeping over me like a blanket as I realized how selfish it would be for me to do that. "Please don't," Edmund murmured against my temple, shivers rushing through me.

"I'd probably just stand on top of the barrier and scream and the whole world for being so cruel," I added, joking slightly, trying to diffuse the tension.

"If you wanted to do something like that, I know a place," he said. I looked over at him curiously.

"A place to jump?"

"No. A place to look out onto the world and just scream. Much better than this. It's a little ways from here, a day trip maybe, but we could do it."

I laughed. "You would do that?"

"Sure," he shrugged. "It'd be cool. We could go for a picnic. Your family and mine-"

"Mine?" I interrupted him, stepping back slightly.

"Yeah," he said slowly. "Why would you think otherwise?"

"I'm not trying to get all lovey-dovey with them, Goose," I said, though I don't know why I held back with him anymore.

We both stood there for a moment, the silence suddenly becoming awkward as I looked away from him and crossed my arms.

"El," he began, myself still looking out to the sky. "I'm not asking you to do that. I'm asking you to at least try to make amends with them. I know you're scared, we all are, for Aslan's sake," he exhaled heavily and leaned on the stone barrier. I stayed silent and watched the sky. I wanted to tell him how I was scared of having to let my family go but the words just wouldn't come out. This was different than Lucy, this was Edmund, and if the time came for when I told him, my only instinct would be to act on his words.

"You're not as easy to read as you think you are," he said suddenly, my eyes inadvertently going to him. I kept them on his jawbone as he spoke, clenching my own. "I think you're more complicated than you even understand. All this is happening to you, and your first instinct is to take a step back and breath. Then everything will be alright," he paused, turning to me, "Isn't there something wrong with that? Don't you feel more than that? Anger, maybe? Sadness? Fear? I've given myself time to think and yet I still don't understand how you are coping."

"I don't know either," I said simply, watching him, shifting back on my heels.

He looked at me, mouth open slightly like he was waiting for the words to come to him.

"Well," he said. "If you don't forgive them, you'll only destroy what little time you have left."

I stood quiet, my eyes never leaving his, when Sophia ran through the garden gate.

"El," she said breathlessly, approaching the both of us. "What are you doing out here? Come back inside."

I stood there between the two of them and shifted slightly forward. Edmund's eyes fell to the ground. I could see she wanted me to go, and nobody was holding me back. I had to. The only thing worse than loosing them would be disappointing them.

"Okay, Soph. I'll be right there," I said, watching her smile and then turn on her heel, back to the courtyard downstairs.

I turned to Edmund, a shy smile on my face.

"Happy birthday, Goose," I sighed, watching his mouth upturn as he looked at me with a beautiful crooked smile.

"How do those words feel coming out of your mouth?" he said, gazing my way.

"Alright," I told him, stepping closer and placing my hands on either of his face, noticing the rough edges alongside it.

"Just as long as it's not for me," I grinned, and then adding, "I didn't get you anything."

"I didn't want you to," he said, winding his hands around my hips.

"How come?"

His lips connected to my forehead. "No," he breathed against me. "You already give me enough."

I looked up to him, hands on either side of his face, and said, "I know what I could give you."

"What?" he asked, running his hand over my ear and placing it along my shoulder. I looked up to him, hands on either side of his face, and brought my lips to his. It was a quick peck and as I parted from him, he chuckled.

"I would hope you would have given me that anyway."

"Don't be so sure," I warned jokingly. He threw his head back shortly in laughter as he brought his arms around me in an embrace. It felt good to be so close to him, like the broken and beaten parts of me fit into his like pieces of a puzzle.

When we parted, he looked at me, and I could see something deep within his eyes that flashed something- something of worry.

His head dropped and he leaned it against my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around him, running his back and holding him, as his breath fell heavy against my chest.

We stood there for many more moments, me holding him, and then his head slowly moved up so his lips connected loosely to the skin just underneath my collarbone.

"You were never scared of me," he murmured against me, running his head up so we embraced each other with our cheeks touching.

"I know. I know what I'm scared of, and it's not you," I said, and then suddenly I was outside of myself as I spoke, explaining to him how I couldn't get the words out. "I can't bring myself to tell you, Ed. I'm so sorry," I faced his chest, pausing or a moment.

He parted us, now standing about a foot away from me. "It's okay. When you find the words, you can tell me."

"Okay," I breathed, and hand in hand, we went back to the dining hall.

That was the first time I ever lied to Edmund Pevensie.

* * *

The instance we entered the courtyard I felt my stomach empty in nervousness, like all the my body had been filled with was anxiety and nerves pressing at all my internal walls. If Edmund wasn't standing right behind me as we entered, I probably would have ran.

But, unfortunately for me, he like a wall, blocking me from getting away.

No music was playing, my entire family sitting at a circular table off to the side.

I approached it, Sophia seeing me and saying, "Finally, El. You just missed the last set, but everyone loved it. Some were a little confused, but that's okay. Dad's going to play again in a bit."

"Great," I said, trying to sound genuine as I sat down in the empty chair next to her, Edmund finding someone to chat with inside.

"You should play, El," my father said, across the table. I laughed slightly.

"Dad, I haven't played in years. There's no way I could pull it off."

My father leaned back in his chair, watching me, and took a sip of his water.

"So you've been here at Cair Paravel the whole time," he said. "You like it here?"

I answered, "I do. The monarchs have been very kind to me. I'm very grateful."

"We definitely owe them greatly," he admitted, looking away from me. "Especially because of all that's happened."

I nodded slightly, watching him stand up.

"I'm going to play another, I think you'll like this one, El," he looked at me the way a father would look at his daughter in hopes of forgiveness, making me throat and mouth feel dry with a bittersweet taste.

"Good luck, Dad," Sophia said as he turned around, smiling slightly.

"Actually, Soph, I think I'll need your help," he said, and she smiled, happily joining him and disappearing into the crowd.

The rest of us sat in silence at the table: by mother, my brothers, and me.

"I wonder what they'll play," James said beside me. I shrugged.

Jude bit his thumb and wandered over to my mother, placing one of his tiny hands at her hips. She smiled and picked him, placing him in her lap and wrapped one of her arms around his waist.

"James," I said turning to my brother. He looked over to me, an almost blank expression on his face. "I'm going to want to leave once they start playing."

He sat back. "Okay-"

"Please don't let me," I interrupted him, sounding a bit desperate.

"You can count on that," he said after a moment, revealing a wide smile.

I nodded, biting my lip as the nerves beat through my skin and the anticipation took over.

I tried to pay attention on one thing, but the only thing my eyes could plant themselves on were my mother and Jude. Looking at them, it was almost a dream. I dreamed of this moment. I _craved_ it.

I sighed heavily. My mother playing with Jude's hands and making him giggle.

That is all I wanted, the security of a mothers warmth, and yet a pang of sadness hit me as I knew I would never experience such joy like that again. I would never be my mother's little girl. I was grown up now, and all the innocence and ignorance of childhood felt as though it drifted off me in a matter of minutes.

"Sophia's on violin,"James noted, peeking his head over the crowd. "They've got someone on piano, too."

I nodded slightly, still subtly watching my mother press her lips to Jude's dark, curly-haired head.

The scattered chatter if the crowd died down as I heard notes hit the air like boulders falling down a hill. They rumbled and rolled until I could make them out clearly.

I shut my eyes. This was one of my favorites.

Inside, I felt as though I would either explode or shrivel up and die.

James didn't seem to notice my apprehension, standing up and reaching for my hands.

I pulled away. "I'll stay. I'm not going to dance."

"Your loss," he said without a second though, turning and disappearing into the middle of the courtyard.

My eyes narrowed. Was that how he planned to get me to dance? Make me feel as though I was missing something?

I was kidding myself if I believed I wasn't.

My mother laughed, an elegant sound contrasting with the sharp, upbeat music of the violin, drums, and piano.

The music remained steady, very familiar from my early years on earth. I was reluctant to remain down, but I feared what would happen if I found my brother in the crowd.

I looked around, realizing I was alone at the table as everyone had abandoned me to the music. I sat still, feeling my teeth draw blood from my lip. It tasted bitter, and I tried to distract myself by wiping it off with a napkin but still the music penetrated my eardrums. Normally, I could make sounds I didn't want to hear become white noise on my radar.

But, it was curious, I think I knew deep down I didn't want to drown it out. It meant something so vitally important to me.

I hesitantly stood up and approached the crowd. The music got louder and the creatures got more excited as I walked further into the hearth of the dancing, everyone around me clapping and cheering to the beat. I excused myself to most, trying to find my brother, when a hand grabbed me and I spun around.

"Finally," James smiled, not giving a moment to speak as he took my hand and pulled me into an open spot of the crowd.

"Everyone out of the way!" he said loudly, swinging me around in a circle, creating a barrier around us with the little audience we had around us.

"James!" I shrieked. "What are you doing?"

"Having fun!" he answered, gleefully. "You don't want to kick anybody, do you?"

My eyes widened. "James-" I exhaled heavily as he wound his right arm around my waist and held my right hand in his left. "I'm not doing swing."

He exhaled. "Fine. We should start with something simpler anyway."

He lead me across our small space, very simple, repetitive steps to begin with, turning me abruptly at each corner. I felt new. I felt rejuvenated.

"Alright," he said to me in a yell, over the crowd, "Now we start scaring people."

I opened my mouth in protest, but he backed away from me.

"Don't you remember?" he asked. "You start."

And then the memory hit me like a stack of bricks, both in my brain and my muscles. A whole new rush of nerves washed over me and the movement came to me whether I wanted it to or not.

I reached out my hand to him, following his gaze as he approached me. I couldn't help but smile as his hand grabbed mine and he spun me around twice, bringing me into his hands which landed in my waist.

Our arms came out over our heads and crossed each other, myself having to spin to unwind it again. He smiled.

"Now you're a dancer, El."

I laughed, going closer to him as we danced faster and faster to keep up with the build up of the music. We spun in circles I lost track of after a while, focusing on my brother and his smile and the laughter we had together.

I only noticed the crowd that was now focusing on us, cheering and clapping us on, when the music softened slightly.

"Swing?" James asked, stopping, the memories coming back because I was not rushing to keep up with the beat that kept my body moving forward.

_There was a boy and girl, neither older than twelve, who stood their living room together. A record was playing in the background, the sound of vinyl rubbing against the needle encouraging them to dance._

"Yes," I said, taking his hand in mine.

He grinned. "Welcome back, Eleanor."

I tried not to smile as he spun me and started our pathway again. After a moment, he hands lifted me at the waist and I flew through the air, releasing a real, genuine laugh as he did so.

_And the world may have been crumbling down, but they made it their own._

I saw faces in the crowd but my mind would not form them completely as James guided me through the air, the music becoming the path I had chosen to live.

The only one I got a flash of was Edmund, and unable to hold it back, I smiled as he watched us.

And then it was over and suddenly the world spun around me as I only had James to hold on to. We both laughed, the clapping and cheering around us making me feel as though I may smile so wide that my lips will literally start to expand on my face.

"El, has anything about you changed? Really?" James wondered. I'm glad he had spoken because the crowd that had formed around us was making me feel small and bare.

I tried to shake my head to him, his eyes held loosely on me, but a feeling of sickness rushed over me. We both exited the opening of the crowd, disappearing just like everyone else when a new song began to play that distracted them.

My mouth dried, watching my mother and Jude approach us with Edmund and Lucy trailing behind, all smiles on their faces. Their chatter penetrated my eardrums, but not enough for me to forget what I had realized.

I wasn't afraid of any of this; the memories, the laughs, or even _her _or what I was. I wasn't afraid of war, or Edmund, or any of my feelings on that because I knew that in the end what must happen will happen. I wasn't afraid of forgiving of letting go or anything in between and I knew this because as I danced and finally felt free even though gravity had me pressed down my body replaced hopelessness with joy in a matter of seconds.

Jude tugged at my mother's skirt, asking for her to hold him, when Lucy came up to me, grabbing my hands.

"That was fantastic, El," she said, almost mesmerized. "How in the world did you do it?"

I stared at her for a moment, locking eyes with Ed before managing to say, "I just danced and I remembered how."

Lucy gave me a gleeful smile as she released my hands, and my breath hitched.

I was not afraid of the world. I was afraid of missing it.

James stood next to me, winding a hand around my hip as he spoke to Edmund across from us. I would have remained to be in fear of my fear, but two snake-like eyes had set themselves on me from across the room, grabbing my attention with their nearly black hue. It was Prince Solomon, different than I had remembered. He continued to stare even after our eyes met, like he wasn't ashamed of what he was doing.

I felt redness rise to my cheeks as his chin tipped up slightly, like he had analyzed something and found what he had looked for, and without a single word to me he turned on his heel and strode back into the crowd.

I looked down, hiding my face in James' arm as I let the world sink into darkness around me.

* * *

**Author's Note: Yay! Back onto schedule, kinda. Now Prince Solomon is up to something... that can't be good! Hopefully you enjoyed this chapter. I would love to thank everyone individually but alas, my email is pretending it doesn't know what is spam and what is not so it deleted the batch from the last chapter. I will start up with the individual thanks for next week because I know how grateful and lucky I am to have such wonderful, avid readers. Please continue to give me feedback; it gets me through the week! I'm hoping to get maybe 5 reviews by the next time I update!**


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